My friend kept dds money and used Tesco vouchers

[jammyjamjam]

Hi, ds had inservice yesterday and a friend (a mum from school) offered to take her, her own dd and 2 others to an amusement park, entry fee was 25 pounds. When ds got back in the afternoon, we chatted about the day and it turns out the mum paid for my dd and the 2 other children with Tesco vouchers, ie, she had redeemed her Tesco points to pay for the 4 dcs and then kept 75 pounds form my dd and the 2 other dc. Surely she could have told us that this place took in Tesco vouchers and I could have used my own points and saved the money? I'm grateful that she took dd but surely she should have been upfront about her intention of using vouchers....AIBU?

No, Carmine. Those of us saying we'd be ok with it would BE ok with it.

I understand the other POV, I just don't share it.

Make sure every SINGLE thing you her give from now till the point the equivalent value has been reached comes from your Clubcard points.

Justice will be served.

I can do you a spreadsheet.

Reread my post, Winifred. I never said you wouldn't be ok with it. I said you'd (universal you, not you in particular) be a shitty person to do it. Some people are happy to do shitty things. Some people don't mind shitty things being done to them. It doesn't alter the fact that it's shitty to make a profit of an unknowing friend.

*off, not of.

But she did financially profit from the day... if you shop at tesco or get uour fuel from there (money you have to spend anyway to live) you build up clubcard points. We don't normally do our food shopping there but build up heaps of points buying fuel for two cars. Tesco is the cheapest place to buy fuel anyway so the points are a bonus.
We then get say £20 in clubcard vouchers. We could use these towards a food shop or double them to spend in different depts in store but the far better deal is to swap them for days out tokens at 4x or 5x their value. Hence I now have £100 worth of days out tokens to use in the summer. But then...I invite a load of kids to a theme park and take their cash in exchange for the vouchers. Technically the kids and parents haven't lost out....but I am definitely quids in!

And some people just don't think that this is a shitty thing!

Anyway, OP has gone so I will too.

We could use these towards a food shop or double them to spend in different depts in store but the far better deal is to swap them for days out tokens at 4x or 5x their value. Hence I now have £100 worth of days out tokens to use in the summer.

Not strictly true, as you end up spending money on the park, in food for example, and it costs to travel there. Plus, you are still paying full cost in store.
The deal is only better if we really wanted to have those days out, otherwise, you are just spending more money. And the better deal would have been to spend it on groceries.

But I digress.

Well I use them for trips to the zoo which I would pay for anyway and always take a packed lunch. Fuel is free (company car so we actually MAKE money or points on filling it up). Appreciate this isn't the case for everyone.

If she had used her vouchers to pay for the trip she would have lost out. She has gained them through grocery shopping so they are hers to use. If she then only asked for whatever the small amount is then YOU are getting the benefit of her previous spending, not her.

Therefore YABU.

Mewkins, we have no idea how the op's friend accrued her clubcard points. She might have been saving them for years.

For me to buy my petrol at Tesco would cost me a fortune - the nearest one with a forecourt is 10 miles away.

I would still like to know which park it was, and how far it is from the OP's house. Last time I went to Alton Towers it cost me 80 quid in fuel, as i live in the SE. But the op has gone so I doubt we will ever know now

mewkins - seems fine to me. You have vouchers you can use to buy XXXXX and if you spend them on the other family you have made it so you can only buy XXX if you take two extra children therefore the money puts you back where you were albeit spending money in the store and not on a entrance ticket.

"sly and devious"

Yeah, the cow, how dare she take your DD out for the day at a theme park? The bitch.

Sorry It'sfab, I nearly didn't see you there, have you lost weight?

Lol, love how the OP has flounced because the turn of tide to YABU. But apparently we're all sneaky, dishonest users because we don't agree with her. Okay for her to come on here and badmouth her "friend" who had the decency to take her child out for the whole day but she'll continue to use her to entertain her DC and not actually confront the issue, just bitch and snark on an internet forum. Horrible, horrible person.

Just saw you CTK!! I haven't weighed myself so just the one pound off, Will weigh in again on Sunday..

There would have been nothing wrong with DD's entrance being paid with the £25 cash given.

Therefore why didn't it happen?

Because it benefited OP friend not to.

She went home with cash in her purse that she didn't start the day with as a direct result of this decision. That does not sit right with me.

She went home with cash in her purse that she didn't start the day with as a direct result of this decision. That does not sit right with me

Me neither.

My family has yearly membership to a Safari Park. It means we get in 'free' and also get reduced rates for other features of the park. However, whenever we go we get given a 'free return ticket' to the park to be redeemed that year. The ticket has the Car Reg and number of passengers written on it.

I can use these 'free return tickets' to get my friends into the Park. All I would need to do is swap cars with my friend at the bottom of the driveway, giving her the free return ticket that goes with my car registration, whilst I go in with her car using my own yearly passes. Oh and then I'd be given another free return ticket with my friends car registration on that she could use herself another time.

By doing this I would be saving my friend at least £48 (two adults one child), and actually £96 if she used the second free return ticket as well.

Could I charge her then? I have already paid for my yearly passes, so didn't get them 'free' by virtue of using the park.

(I wouldn't dream of doing so btw. I think that would be bloody awful of me)

She must have felt pretty desperate for some cash, to have come up with this.

"She went home with cash in her purse that she didn't start the day with as a direct result of this decision. That does not sit right with me."

Exactly.

It all just smacks a bit of whipping your calculator out at the end of dinner and working out who had a starter and who had mineral water - it's viewpoint, I guess - in my particular circle of friends this would not bother me in the slightest, as the balance of "who's due what" is constantly shifting, and I would take it in my stride as I'd be sure there would be some reciprocal occasion in the future.

Speak to her, if she's really a friend, she could be 100% oblivious that this would bother you.

She also went home without vouchers worth two theme park entrances in her purse.

Not sure why OP feels that she is entitled to her friends Tesco vouchers, used for theme park or not.

Possibly Quint, and if that's the case it's certainly understandable if not justifiable.

However in my world, I would have been upfront with my friend about the voucher usage so they had the chance to say no, or that they didn't mind either way.

It will never feel ok to me to take cash off friends under these conditions even if I'm doing them a favour in taking their kids out.

As I said upthread, I've done almost exactly the same thing with a tesco outing, and my friends paid the face value of the tesco voucher. Which tbh I felt bad asking for but it was all honest and upfront and I only asked as I couldn't afford to lose the in store shopping value.

---

I genuinely want to know from any who thinks OP is bu.

Tesco offer an odeon ticket in exchange for £2.50 CC voucher. Odeon ticket would normally cost £9. Could you really in all good faith go and ask your friends for £9 cash having spent a £2.50 voucher? And would you be happy to explain that's what you were doing?

OP doesn't think that. She thinks they shouldnt have been used for her dd at all.

Given the choice I'd much rather have £75 instead of 3 £6.25 tesco vouchers.

Clearly the same for OP friend. Otherwise why would she have done it?

Dishonest to not be upfront about it.