To be pissed off dd1 keeps eating dp tea!

[Anotherchapter]

She is 19 for god sake!

She has hers when she gets in from work around 7:15pm . She has probably quite a large meal for some one her size (she is very petite) finishes it all off then with in an hour or so I can hear her in the kitchen faffing about looking for food.

Recently she has taken to taking food off dp plate as he gets in at 9:30 ish.

She knows it's left for him And I tell her to leave it alone. I didn't plate his up tonight (did a beef curry) I heard her come down stairs and go in the kitchen. I heard the lid off the pan lift up, I told her to leave his bloody tea alone, then a few seconds later I heard her put it back and go back upstairs.

Just been in to check and she had took all the fucking meat out of it bar one shitty morsel!

If she gets hungry she knows she can make toast or cereal but to be taking his food - when she knows it's for him and that's all there is pissing me off.

I've just been up and told her off - she said she only had a tea spoon full

I don't know what her problem is.

As the dd is a 19 year old adult why should her mother be the one cooking food for her later on? If she wants a late night snack she makes herself one. This isn't hunger it's a greed power trip.

OP, what about showing her this thread? I think it would be kill or cure and bring things to a head.

I wouldn't even consider showing her this thread. If I was her, I'd see that as a massive breach of trust and that you had more faith in strangers on the internet than in her.

However, I'd also just be making more food. She doesn't want to eat 'snacks'. She wants more dinner. If she is conscious of her weight (and most teenagers are) then perhaps she thinks she has found a way of eating that works for her maintaining her slim figure ie she eats dinner and then eats another plate of the same food later. There are quite a few diets that suggest eating the same food rather than snacking. Honestly I'd just be making more food, and if I had to ask her to contribute more money to cover it, then I'd do that.

FFS Bookaboo - there is no need to make more food, there is plenty available, she is just choosing to take from other people's. And - she's an adult - no need to run round after her "making food".

Vycount the OP chooses to make meals for everyone. I didn't suggest she had to cook for everyone. When I was 19, it was much more likely I'd be cooking meals for my parents than vice versa. However, that's the routine that the OP has.

Making her more food in the evening won't address her taking a sausage off DD2's plate at breakfast or taking DP's pillow for her boyfriend.

Making more food in the evening (and the OP has been clear that her DD is "stuffed" by the amount the OP currently makes and has plenty of other food available to snack on if she wants) is not a solution to the situation the OP describes.

But the DD doesn't want more food at dinnertime- she declares herself stuffed.

It's an incredibly fast digestive system which leaves you stuffed at 7.30pm when you finish your own dinner, yet so starved by 9pm that you're picking the best bits out of someone else's dinner - let alone the fact that there are countless other snacks available, and the fact that she is an earning, fully grown adult who is perfectly capable of buying her own snacks.

Lattelover has the best advice on this thread.

'If you don't stop eating food left for others, I'm not going to prepare any for you.'

Lattelover has the best advice on this thread.

And why is that?

Oooh are we doing a pop contest? I love those.

I'm going to pick waltermittythesequel, TaliZorahVasNormandy, Mrsjayy, ErmagerdNerknerm, VanitasVanitatum, MrsWinnibago, Nomama, Boaty, Vycount, differentnameforthis, ilovesooty, Thumbwitch, Inertia, Castlemilk and of course FlossyMoo as having given actual advice having actually RTFT.

Another... It was proper hairdressed hair , had to rush off and wash it as I found more 'blobs' at the back. That time of night and having to do 'haircare'... eek! Feel less head-rippy today now. I wanted that 'dragon' emoticon, it's gone?!

Can I just say I thought Lyings points on this thread were note worthy, well thought out and down right brilliant.

In fact I luffs her and her new hair

... and doing that uber annoying thing... I can't believe it! I'd like to thank my hairdresser and, and ... all of my MN friends, especially that FlossyMoo... without them, I would not be here today...

Oh I got a thanks op let us know how you get on with the chat on monday I think the posters who think you are controlling rationing starving her are way off the mark

Oooh! Flowers, you shouldn't have.
Back at ya Lying, brilliant performance.

It is a frustrating thread though isn't it? I keep feeling I need to re-state some of the points Op has made:
Op cooks the family a meal, including her daughter.
Daughter is not still hungry after eating family meal - she is stuffed.
If she feels hungry a while after the meal, there is plenty of food available for her to eat.
However, she chooses to steal the best bits from DP's meal, even though she's been asked not to.
She extends this behaviour to other situations, stealing food and other items from family members, she doesn't care about inconvenience to them.

It is frustrating, Op cooks for family, pretty normal, DD eats til shes full, then an hour wants more. Although, I dont think its really about hunger, it's about taking it because she can or atleast thinks she can.

Hi ladies - I will update on Monday night. there may be a head lock involved

I'm looking forward to the update. I'm with the poster that suggested an empty plate instead of a dinner. Or beef curry with only one piece of meat.

My dbro was a swine for this growing up and this type of greed still boils my piss. If my parents bought enough items for one each of something for dinner, he'd eat two for a snack. We'd all then have to share the remainder. Love him dearly but he remains selfish and entitled.

I know this is slightly off topic, but I keep thinking about this delicious home-cooked beef curry and I get hungry every time I see this thread. Do you have the recipe to hand by any chance?!

OP, another angle would be to not cook a meal earlier in the evening, but one for you, your husband and her when her gets home. Then there is no meal to pick from.

dode us one I make up !

Two large onions thinly sliced and brown them as much as you dare. Add four crushed garlic cloves and a green finger chili . Add one and half table spoon of ground corriander, one tablesp off feenugreek , one tsp of mustard sends (ground) 1/2tsp of fennel seeds ground. 1/2tsp of ground cumin. 1tsp of hot chilli powder. 1tsp of tumeric, 1tsp if ground black pepper . 1/2 tsp of salt. Add meat and brown.add tinned tomatoes, tsp of tom purée and a can of water. Put in oven till meat goes soft in 180. When ready add two teaspoons of viniger/lemon juice and stir through. It's basically what I've got in!

Brilliant recipe, Another, thanks! Will be checking in with the thread tomorrow, stay strong and sort that daughter of yours out, little greedy guts that she is.

Actually, Funky makes an excellent point.

You could make dinner ready for when your H gets home, and DD1 can either eat with you then or have her portion saved for the following day. I'm guessing that DD2 is much younger and eats at say 5pm ish, rather than waiting for the adults- her meal could be saved for the next day in a sealed labelled tub in thr fridge, and reheated at her teatime the following day.