To hope that I can ask about FF without being shot down in flames?

[Darksideofthemoon88]

I'm interested in WHY people choose to FF if not for medical reasons (ie they can't because of medication they have to take, or because their baby was very premature and is unable to suckle) - I've seen a lot of threads where people assert that FF was best for them/their family/their baby or that they chose to FF without trying BF, and I'm curious as to why. Genuinely curious I'm not interested in fighting with anyone about what's best or right; I'd just like to read about why people FF because I honestly don't know. In the interests of full disclosure though (I know how MNs feel about this! ), I am a breastfeeding mother.

aero - my question wasn't about women who can't continue and so swap to formula.

It was asking why women who have lots of problems and really struggle to breast feed still dont swap to formula.

OP - if you google Infant

Aargh - posted without finishing.
here
OP - if you look at this link it sets out all the info on women's feeding choices in the UK in tables. They (NHS) do this survey every 5 years, but for some reason I can't find the full document for 2010. The link I gave you is for the 2005 Infant Feeding Survey.

The study comments that the main reasons people give for choosing to ff (as opposed to stopping breastfeeding) are all to do with the mother - lifestyle, convenience, don't like the idea of breastfeeding, didn't like breastfeeding previous child. The reasons people give for choosing to breastfeed are predominantly to do with the health and welfare of the the baby.

Posts on this topic on mumsnet tend to bear witness to the survey's findings being pretty representative, except that breastfeeding mothers here are less likely to mention health issues as references to this might be seen as sanctimonious/guilt tripping. Mentioning convenience and laziness about bottle preparation and night feeds is the more socially acceptable rationale for breastfeeding as it is gently self-deprecating and gives lie to the suspicion that they may see themselves as superior for opting to breastfeed.

"Writer read the thread and you will see why many woman can nit come through it."

I think you need to flag up that widespread problems with breastfeeding either don't occur at the same rate in many other countries, or don't stop women breastfeeding in the same way as they do in the UK.

It IS a cultural thing vastly more than a biological.

Breastfeeding is not physically or emotionally unsupportable for most women who don't live in countries without cheap, easily available and heavily marketed infant formula.

The thread has been amazingly civil considering BF and FF are usually contentious issues on parenting forums, why come back just to stir it mini? There is post after post stating that in a lot of cases BF is physically and emotionally unsupportable.

Phaedra - did you mean me? I haven't said anything about developing countries

And in many of the countries where there isn't access to evil, wicked, poisonous formula babies face dying of starvation if their mother is physically or mentally unable to BF, if another woman is not available to BF on her behalf, or if the baby doesn't take to one of the many unsafe BF substitutes such as unpasteurised animal milk, flour and water, etc.

Thank fuck we live in a country where our choice is BF or FF rather than BF or die.

"The study comments that the main reasons people give for choosing to ff (as opposed to stopping breastfeeding) are all to do with the mother" "The reasons people give for choosing to breastfeed are predominantly to do with the health and welfare of the the baby."

And the problem with that is - ? None, as far as I can see. Arguably that's progress, something which gives women greater freedom and equality. I'm all for progress in womens lives.

We're talking here of a first world country (well, I am anyway) where when used properly infant formula isn't an issue, not somewhere on the African continent with no access to clean water.

I don't understand why people even bring up comparisons between bf and ff in developing countries and bf and ff in the UK.

It's akin to saying you wouldn't dream of eating rare steak in the UK because if you ate it in a developing country you'd be likely to contract poisoning.

The two are not comparable due to hygiene practices and education.

It's not helpful or even valid to talk about developing countries and the dangers of inadequate education in ff in those countries on a thread about ff in the UK.

What bearfrills said.

Didn't even attempt to BF DS2 after DS1. First pregnancy I was ill with Preeclampsia and had an emergency CS. Tried BF but I really hated it so gave up on day three. Never any problems with bonding.

DS1 & DS2 have reached adulthood in excellent health, never any allergies etc. DS1 has a degree and DS2 in Higher so no problems with brain development.

I also think there needs to be a more reasonable approach than just pushing and measuring ebf duration, it's too simplistic. I was in a bf cafe when dc1 was newborn with a women still ebf a baby that was feeding for hour stretches with one hour off between feeds and it had been going on for weeks. The mum looked shockingly dreadful and I remember thinking I would've given formula in her shoes.

Well yes a lot of it should be about the mother as it is her body and well being which are involved.

Ditto other parenting choices such as childcare and when one returns to work.A mothers career,mental well being,household finances etc are deemed as important as what is best for a child.

Also a shed load of less than ideal parenting choices which have no impact on a woman's body,well being or career and aren't that hard to provide alongside having a far bigger impact on a child's future life frankly nobody gives anywhere near as much thought to eg 10 a day,exercise,screen time,reading,language opportunities,limiting red meat/ sugar etc.

I think breastfeeding is great, but I don't think it is important enough that any women should feel obliged to do it if she doesn't want to.

There are risks with formula, especially around safe preparation even in this country. But everyone has to balance those risks for themselves.

Most of the babies who are ff were never in danger of dying from starvation.
Of course its good that there is an alternative to bf, because sometimes there is no way that a baby can have their mother's milk. But its very rare for that to be the case.

The risks of ffing with safe prep are miniscule.

In countries where there is no access to formula (for example it's too expensive) then there is a chance a baby could starve to death if it can it be breastfed for whatever reason.

I felt forced into it by my evangelical midwife who told me I mustn't have any formula in the house. I can still remember the pain from letting down and my poor bleeding nipples. A friend suggested shields which helped with the bleeding.

When I had mastitis and rigors, the midwife 'allowed' me a day off from bf. There was huge pressure to start again from her, so I did, but she wouldnt let me use the shields as they would make my milk dry up apparently...

After a few weeks, the HV took over and she was absolutely lovely. She said to do whatever I wanted to do and suggested a mix of ff and bf might work. The relief from not having to do it any more made everything so much better and I carried on with both up to 5 months.

Someone upthread mentioned that lots of ppl minimise the benefits of bf, and i think that is true.
The protective factors of breastmilk in terms of infection go beyond the risks of unsafe formula preparation. Even with formula made up in a clinically "perfect" way, human milk is superior in terms of protecting against disease and infection.
.

Sorry but a lot of things are superior and healthwise with bfing the benefits just aren't enough for me to be in pain and miserable.If I lived in Africa it would be completely different.

My children have had "superior" healthy parenting choices in countless other ways to make up for any shortfall, such as it is.

How can it be a good thing for babies as a group when it is mostly used by women who can breastfeed?

Pssst! The babies don't know

It's not like bottle fed babies gaze longingly at other babies sucking on their mother's breasts.

When my three get older I'm going to play them off against each other by telling them "one of you was ebf" but not telling them which one of them it was.

I've never seen the supposed benefits of BF minimised, they are widely publicised. What I don't see publicised is the reality of BF. When I asked the HV why they don't tell people what it's really like, and especially what the first 6 - 8 wks are like, she told me that it's because they don't want to put people off! Talk about setting women up to fail.

Worra - they don't know if their mother smoked during pregnancy or weaned them onto shite either.

Babies don't know what's best for them - but we do.

It's perfectly legal and socially acceptable to ignore this in relation to ff and bf, but can we stop pretending that they're the same for babies? They're not!

You're comparing formula feeding, to smoking during pregnancy?

Really?

This thread just keeps on giving...