Was I being a cow or not?????

[Fairyfellowsmasterstroke]

I was in town earlier when I popped to the loo in Debenhams.

When I walked in a young chav mum was sanding near the sink area talking on her phone (her side of the conversation featured such immortal lines as " yeah but, fucking bitch, I'll have her, cunt etc etc). I kid you not a docker would have blushed!!!

Her DC looked about 2 and was sat quietly in the pushchair.

Anyhow I went to the loo (whilst listening to every word and profanity that young mum was uttering - including the "c" word being used with astounding regularity).

After weeing visiting the toilet I shimmed past aforesaid young mum (who was now perched on a sink with one foot resting on the pushchair) to wash my hands. I was about to dry them in the "Blade air dryer" when she stopped her phone conversation and asked me to wait because her DC didn't like the noise.

Fair enough I thought, expecting young mum to vacate the toilet. But no she carried on her phone call berating some poor lad who was fucking with her 'ead, clearly causing her some degree of upset.

I waited a moment and then asked her if she was going so that I could dry my hands, she told me to "wait". I did wait for a few moments (out of respect to Dc not her) but she remained perched on the sink with the phone attached to her ear. I finally looked pointedly at her, she half turned away from me and carried on the phone call. At this point I shoved my hands in the dryer causing poor DC to scream - chav mum snatched up the pushchair and stormed out of the toilets calling me a cow.

I stand by my actions but am expecting a MN flaming!!!

In what universe is 'gobshite' a less offensive alternative to chav?!

Also, wtf was a chav doing in debenhams anyway? unless she'd gone in specifically for the toilets, known for their perfect acoustics in which to cunt and fuck especially if she's 'so short of money'.

Substitute Gateshead and Edinburgh for Liverpool and I'm there with you two. Never in any universe ever would it be a good idea to approach said charva (seeing as chav is so horrific) and move the pram/offer afternoon tea and a nosey friendly ear to her problems. NEVER! Jesus, it's hug a hoodie all over again!

Move the pram! Good god!

You were not being unreasonable OP, if anything you were too accommodating and should've shimmied her along a bit more holds door open for imaginary chav .

bananas

You said
she may not understand that such bad language is offensive.

Yet your very next sentence berates me with
Calling her a 'beeyatch' doesn't deserve a response really, so I don't know why I am bothering.

Oi! Where's my pity and tragic history!

All the op wanted to do was dry her hands she asked the woman to move nicely she didnt the child cried woman flounced off maybe next time she will think

But the OP isn't a Youth Worker and the mum in question wouldn't be expecting to be confronted by one in a Debenhams's loo.

It's kind of up to us as older members of society to explain that this sounds really bad in our ears. No young person I have ever had this conversation with has been rude to me about it - they have mostly listened and taken it on board.

I'm probably one of the oldest members of society on this thread and no way would I have tried that one! Lunacy!

If the OP tried any of the ideas on here, at best she'd be ignored and at worse she'd have got more abuse than she did and possibly a slap.
The woman was an unpleasant piece of work, end of.

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

Too true.

PErsonally I think that blade driers are actually noisier than the older driers, but I still use them. I like the wibble fibble too.

And being chavvy isn't about money, it's about a type of person. Chavs can have money too Daniella Westbrook! So they'd be able to afford Debenhams no worries. They'd even be welcome in Harrods, I'm sure.

I'm openmouthed at the suggestions to take the young person for a cuppa, or to talk to her in her own vernacular to get her to respond positively. Mind you, that would come down to:
"oi cunt, move yer fuckin' pushchair outta here NAH so I can use the fucking drier, orright?"

I wasn't suggesting the OP challenged this mum about her language there and then!

Like I said, I would have done the "do you mind if I move the push chair then?", probably with non-confrontational apologetic shrug. I'd be very surprised if she didn't.

Probably, if someone picked the right moment (a different moment), it would be possible to have a conversation with this mum about how revolting it sounds to use this kind of language, and especially in front of children.

Wish I had left this thread alone... the way some posters are writing about this young mum is at least as offensive as the language she was using.

The word chav may be offensive to some but the behaviour of a chav is offensive IMO. And it is just a matter of opinion.
Some people are vile. I like to keep away from people who behave in an unpleasant, vulgar fashion. I wouldn't waste my time worrying about them having been referred to as a chav. If you don't want to be called a chav don't act like one.
And don't muddy the waters by bleating on about how terrible it is that the OP referred to said specimen as a chav. If if walks like a dog etc. Stop apologising for these people. The female on the phone sounded most unsavoury and unfortunately her type is spreading. Don't feel sorry for her as she clearly couldn't give a rat's arse about her behaviour.

Thumbwitch lol at "talk to her in her own vernacular!! Counjures up great image of Boden-clad middle class Mum, leaning against sinks and saying "Yeah! e's an arsehole innit! Don't fret yerself dearie" just getting it WRONG!

How, Greenbananas, can you express disapproval without judgment. Disapproval or approval is the result of a value judgment.

OP, you did nothing wrong. My own DD was terrified of hand dryers at one point. I made sure I got the hell out of any public loos as quickly as I possibly could. No way would I have hung around them to have a conversation on my phone. I wouldn't anyway - who does that!!

I see Bananas....so if I/we use bad language, albeit even mildly, we are offensive and not worth bothering with, but if some skanky midden in the toilets cunts and fucks on her mobile she is (to quote yourself) "not less human or less understanding just because they use this dreadful language."

I think you have fantasies of being a saviour of some sort.

" sorry , I need to dry my hands as I am in a hurry " . Then .... " oh dear me , what a shame " as I exited the loo and the baby screamed .

She had no right to monopolise the ladies loo and put other people out while she used her potty mouth on her mobile phone . Probably never been pulled up on her behaviour before and uses her attitude and nasty language to intimidate others . Right . Sorted .As you can probably tell I didn't sleep well last night but I really dislike adults using filthy language in front of children ( and yes , I have been know to use some in my time but not around children ) . And as for asking you to " wait " while she finished her phone call .... cheeky mare.

Move the pushchair? What outside? Because what difference would a few inches make if he's scared of driers?

You'd probably get your thermos thrown at your head

Actually, I'm going to say that bananas I am being deliberately obtuse. I know precisely what you're getting at, and fwiw I agree.

It just doesn't apply on a flying visit to the loo that's all. If she doesn't want the drier to drown out her phone call or scare her kid, then she can conduct her business somewhere else, and sod off dictating to me.

Who the hell conducts their in depth phone conversations in the lavs? Stupid cow no matter what 'class' she was.

If her child gets upset by the noise of the hand driers you'd think she'd have moved somewhere else.

If her dc doesn't like noise from hand driers, why is she conducting her social life in a fucking public toilet?

Only one person was unreasonable here & it wasn't the op!

Op yanbu at all.
She sounds vile. Poor child. You dont have private conversations in public toilets!
Around my area chavs are people, usually young people in trackies , gold jewellery with big dogs, swiggings cans and listening to garage or rnb.
Only seen it offensive on here! One of my friends is a chav and calls himself one.

According to tiny temper a 'CHAV' means... council housed and violent.

YAnbu op, I would of done the same.

"Council Housed and Violent" is a backronym. The word comes from 'chaval', Romany for 'boy'.

Young mum, old mum, anyone who behaves like that is probably a bit of a mess but if I saw an Middle Aged mum acting like this I wouldn't feel the need to state she was middle aged, just a bit of a prat who needs to think about her language around her toddler.
It's so unnecessary , I get the generalisation but it doesn't build a great name for us "young mums" who bring up our children just as well as any mum you consider old enough to be a good mother.

This idea that chavs are only young people, what age is it they just suddenly sprout into wonderful, "unchavy", well dressed adults? Does it suddenly happen on there 30th birthday? If so who exactly brought these "young chavs" up to be the "young chavs" they are? There wonderfully groomed, socially acceptable and well rounded parents? I beg to differ. Most of the time (but not always) they "chav" gene runs through the family. I live in Bournouth and there are PLENTY of Middle Aged, Old and OAP chavs here.
Age had absolutely nothing to do with it.

I live in Leicester and the particular area I live in is full to brim with chavs. Around here chav isn't used to describe class or age it is used to describe appearance and behaviour.

The guys who have their trousers down by their knees with their baseball hats on backwards, eye brows pierced and their "you gets me bruv" or " you're a wasteman innit" whilst they hang around with their 'mandem' would be, to me, chavs.
As would the women with their hair scraped and gelled into a high/side ponytail, hooped earings the size of dinner plates, chewing on gum whilst they eff and blind struggling to zips up their Adidas jacket with their fake acrylic nails.

I come from the same area as these people, we have very similar backgrounds, went to the same school but I do not get called a chav because I do not look like one and more importantly I do not act like one. So as I said it has nothing to do with class, around here at least anyway.