To not understand why you'd get your baby's ears pierced?

[Slh122]

On an fb group I'm on there's a post about someone wanting to get her 4 month old's ears pierced. Apparently me asking why she would want to put her baby through pain and at risk of infection makes a 'judgemental bitch'.
AIBU to really not understand piercing a baby's ears?

YANBU to think its crazy behaviour, I agree with you as someone who was forced into having their ears pierced as a child. But YABU to challenge someone else over the decision they have made for their own child. It's nothing to do with you.

I agree!my dd is 13 weeks and I cant imagine piercing her teeny tiny ears. I don't even like cutting her nails.

I was just wondering their reasons behind their choice. They were asking for people's opinion. How does that make me unreasonable, giving my opinion when they asked?

Yanbu, I think it's ridiculous

However ear piercing even on babies is legal and socially acceptable so you should keep your beak out.

I wouldn't take kindly to somebody commenting on my choices.

It's not your baby and if a mother wants to get her baby ears pierced there is nothing you can do about it.

we all parent differently. Me personally don't like seeing babies with ear rings in, but some parents do.

I don't understand how it's possible to give consent on someone who doesn't have the ability to withdraw it. Poor babies

They shouldn't have asked people for opinions on their choices then

Me either ManAlive. I don't buy this whole 'but it's legal' argument. Just because it's legal doesn't make it ok to pierce someone without their permission.

But you weren't just asking. You made a snippy judgey comment and implied that she was deliberately hurting her baby.

I agree with you btw, 100%, it's a vile thing to do.

But if she thinks it's ok then she's not going to appreciate your comments.

If they asked your opinion and you gave it, then you weren't unreasonable. It wasn't clear from your OP that they'd actually asked for opinions, so I thought you just volunteered yours, which is why I said you were UR.

Piercing your baby's ears without its consent is hardly 'parenting' it. I disagree that there's nothing you can do actually. If there is sufficient negative reaction to it then hopefully, at some point in the future, it will become socially unacceptable and restrictions will be placed on piercing babies and small children re minimum age levels etc.

Sorry I meant to put in the OP that they'd posted and asked for opinions. Apologies for the drip feed, totally unintentional!

It should be illegal until 16 when the person themselves can make an informed judgement.

It's perfectly legal to put holes into a minors ears or smack them yet suddenly turns illegal when they reach 18 when it's suddenly abuse to harm another. A child has no means of defending themselves, an adult does so our laws are very crazy.

I don't like it either, but it sounds like they were asking for recommendations for salons and you just butted in with your comments, which was totally unnecessary.

They posted and asked for opinions?

Or did you not like the direction this thread was taking?

If someone accused me of deliberately hurting my baby i to would be majorly fucked off.

it's a very defensive response, though, isn't it? If she was 100% confident in her choice she would have said 'yes, we've looked into all that and still think this is a good time' etc etc (lots of people believe doing it when the child is a baby results in fewer infections than when they are older and will fiddle more).

If you don't want people's opinions, don't go about posting your private business on a public forum like FB.

No Santana, this was a parenting group on fb (so not a local one where they might be asking for recommendations) and they posted about it and asked for opinions. I accidentally missed that bit out in my OP, I thought I had included it. HTH

ICan - but getting your baby's ears pierced (so not a medical necessity) is hurting your baby deliberately. It is unnecessary and of no benefit to the child. You want to decorate her ears with bits of metal.

Fine to question it, not so sure it's important that you understand it as you are under no obligation to do this to your dc.

In my culture we often do this because we like it and think it looks pretty (shallow but what sort of deep philosophical reason did you think there'd be?). Sometimes we like to include a little bit of red in the earring to ward off the devil

I personally don't have girls do have never done it, but it was done to me, my sister, my female cousins and it has always a complete non issue for any of us. I know it's viewed differently in the UK but that seems to be some sort of class thing.

YABU, but you are wasting your time I'm afraid. People will still get their babie's ears pierced and get defensive about it. I'm hardly the Queen, but I think it looks pretty rough, can't understand why they do it.

ICanSeeTheSun how is piercing your baby's ears not deliberately hurting your child? I have had my ears pierced 3 times (at the ages of 12, 14 and 16) and can remember it hurting each time.

If she asked for opinions then she should accept that people will have one.

Exactly River.

I understand that some people get their babies ears pierced as they are too young to remember the pain and discomfort.