To not understand why you'd get your baby's ears pierced?

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On an fb group I'm on there's a post about someone wanting to get her 4 month old's ears pierced. Apparently me asking why she would want to put her baby through pain and at risk of infection makes a 'judgemental bitch'.
AIBU to really not understand piercing a baby's ears?

that is a very dubious reason for doing anything, Hemlock. It will still hurt the baby at the time, and is still being done without her consent. Not every female wants to have peirced ears, you know.

Here in Spain, almost all girls have their ears pierced actually in the hospital the days after they are born - btw you get to stay 1, 2 or even 3 nights in Spanish hospitals after birth ! :)

We didn't pierce our daughter's ears, but now some people assume she is a boy.

At the end of the day, live and let live. If it were up to me, in an ideal world nobody would smoke, or go to church or eat at McDs, but they do, in their millions, so just let them get on with it

A lot of parenting decision are made before a child can give consent.

would you say taking a baby to have their injections is causing pain deliberaty

I agree RiverTam. In my opinion no one should have any cosmetic body modification without their permission. And they should understand all the implications.

My daughter is ten - she hasn't asked to have her ears pierced yet and she won't have my permission until she no longer needs it!

I think it's high time a law was brought out forbidding this in babies and very young children. It must be really painful. I think it looks absolutely dreadful.

We did recently agree to get my 8 yo dd's ears pierced as the approach came from her and (after 4 years of solid nagging!) we felt it was informed consent and not a whim. I was really, really upset though when my aunt's reaction was that 'she didn't agree with mutilating children'. I imagine this child's mum was similarly stung that you suggested she was in some way damaging the child, and that was the reason she reacted in such an insulting way. I do think SWBU to post asking for opinions and then insult you for expressing yours!

Personally, I don't like babies' ears being pierced, but I don't think those doing it are necessarily doing it for selfish reasons. Almost all girls in Britain do eventually get their ears pierced, and one friend said she'd rather do it when the child was tiny, so that she could take care of the cleansing rather then a forgetful teenager. I've also heard people criticising others for leaving it late 'because it will hurt her now, won't it?' (on the ground that babies quickly forget).

Injections have a beneficial purpose (unless you're happy for your child to succumb to serious illness...) - pierced ears serve no purpose whatsoever.

My Spanish friend refused to pierce her DD's ears because she knew it has negative connotations over here, but she said it was really difficult not to because it's a major part of her culture. Her family were really disappointed - kept asking how people would know she was a girl.

To be fair the way you gave your opinion you did come across a bit of an arse. You could have pointed it out gently, but you took a swipe at her.

For me, aside from me thinking it looks rough, I'd worry about them snagging an ear ring. Or another child pulling it.

I had mine done at 10. Went swimming one day, someone doing front crawl whacked the side of my head. I couldn't find my little gold stud and it was sore, thought it had been ripped out. About a week or 2 later it popped out from inside my ear lobe, along with some oozing puss.

She probably wouldn't have called you what she did if it didn't come across like you were being one

A lot of people say it doesn't hurt as much to get it done when you're a baby, and that's why they do it so young, and they like the look of it.

I personally don't like the look of it, and I would prefer to leave the decision whether to pierce or not to the child, when he/she's old enough. They aren't my ears, after all. I made the decision for my ears, I'll let my kids make it for theirs.

Well it looks bling innit, plus now everyone knows it's a girl. Duh.

ICan - can you really not see the difference between vaccinations, which may save your baby's life, and getting her ears pierced ? Really?

I know several adult women who have never chosen to have their ears pierced. Would you hold them down and force a needle through their ears? Why on earth do people persist in believing that anyone should have this foisted upon them?

I don't buy pierced ears being part of someone's 'culture' (what an abused and misused word that is these days). It's tradition, that's all.

Yeah I never get the 'so they know she's a girl' thing.

Babies tend to all have little or no hair, and a lot pretty much look the same. What does it matter if random strangers think they're a boy?

yanbu it is painful getting ears pierced and it looks wrong on babies .

if you see my 1st reply i said i don't like babies having their ears pierced.

Why not start one of those petitions and ask for signatures? I sometimes wonder about this - lots of things seem to cause outrage /upset on mumsnet so why don't posters start the petition on change rather than targeting individuals?

Can think of several examples. Ear piercing in under fives, benefits, parent spaces.

Or,if you really want to ameliorate the pain and suffering of young children in the UK you could campaign for better dental hygiene....

Start a thread about improving dental hygiene and I'm sure people will post in the positive too...

There have already been online petitions about ear piercing in children and babies, but no Govt seems willing to take on the issue, 'cos it's a cultural one innit.

I was thinking of the causes that come up on mumsnet all the time, rather than specific issues I might want to change.

That's not the point. The point is, what is it about ear piercing that gets people on here so upset when there are so many things in the UK which hurt children more.

I agree. It's cultural.

ear piercing has gone back 5,300 years.

Its not a new thing, Just a newish problem.

to me deliberatly hurting a baby or child is child abuse, ear piercing is not abuse.

I disagree with this whole "culture" excuse entirely. I had my ears pierced at 6 weeks old - all the girls in my family have it done when they are babies and I remember all my friends having their ears pierced when I was a child. So piercing babies ears is part of my culture but, fortunately for my daughter I have a fucking mind and brain of my own and despite pressure from older family members I have realised that putting holes in a baby for purely aesthetic reasons is seriously bad parenting.

You know what? Genital mutilation and slavery are part of some people's culture. It does mean that these practices aren't better off stopped.

I also don't understand why we aren't allowed to judge people about this. In lot of circumstances I can understand not judging the parenting decisions of others as what works for each child or family differs and we aren't armed with all the facts. Piercing a babies ears though is pretty straightforward isn't it? It's not best for any family or child. If you do it you are a shallow, thoughtless prat and you may as well have that tattooed on your head.

I am not keen on ear peircing in babies, and would never do it without the childs consent, having said that, my dd1 had hers done at age 4 after asking for a belly button piercing, said no to that but you can have your ears done instead if you want , she jumped at the chance, and I took her the same day (she is now a pierced and tattoed 21yr old) my dd2 was not keen shes 5, I have asked if she wanted it done she said no, then when we were in town the other day she said she would like it done, and I chickened out of it and asked her to wait a bit, not sure why as I always said as soon as they ask, they can have them done!

I too think it is deliberately hurting the child for only cosmetic purposes, and yanbu to say so if thats what she was asking. but I think from age 3 depending on the child if they can understand that it hurts a bit but are still insistant and the parent is ok with it then there is nothing wrong with it.

ear piercing is such a non issue. I dont much like it nor have i got any of my children's ears pierced, but i have no idea why anyone cares. Most of the time its a cultural thing, and no big deal.