To be pissed off at DPs constant 'she must be the milkman's' "jokes" regarding our 1 YO DD?

[Mummytoagorgeouschops]

Our DD is 1YO with blonde hair and blue eyes. Both me and my DP have brown hair and green eyes.

Over the last year I have gotten increasingly sick of the 'she looks nothing like me she must be the milkmans/postmans/undertakers etc etc' jokes which I think are in pretty bad taste.

We were at a BBQ tonight and he mentioned it at least three times to different people. If I'm quite honest, I wanted to keep my DD inside and away from people as when they mentioned her 'beautiful blue eyes' or 'blonde curls' they were met with some stupid remark by my DP. They looked genuinely shocked when he said it and I feel as though it portrays me in a bad light, almost as though I have a penchant for sleeping around!

I know its a joke and there is no truth in it but she is the spitting image of him when he was a baby. I dont want her to pick up on what he's saying either especially as he has another DD from a previous relationship who he reckons Is the spitting image of him, although I think she looks a lot more like her mum than him.

It's just really starting to upset me. I just want to burst into tears as I feel so humiliated when he says it

OP knew he was a father so she ASSUMED HE WOULD ACT LIKE ONE.

OP i think i like you too. Its bloody heartening to see a young woman not stand for the shit youve been putting up with.

By all means op,have a pop.doesn't change the message,there's four of you in this relationship
And at the moment you're estranged from your partner?i hope you can come to a resolution

There is a hint of steel in those young veins. Initially that stubborn streak keeping you in a state of defensive denial. Now I think this tool is going to get a Hell Of A Shock. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy

Its the OPS partner who needs to realise that there are four. Why does he get a free pass.............oh wait he has a penis!

There are varying amounts of people in this relationship from the thread I have read.

Day after day after day there is 3; op, dsd and dd.
Come the evening there is 2 ('d'p and dsd) v op and dd.

Then at family gatherings there is op and dd v everyone else.

He will actually have to spend a few hours caring for HIS OWN CHILD by himself. We are in 2014 yet this is STILL seen as unusual for a man to do by certain quarters.

I think I like you all too! Old head on young shoulders me. Oh wait, I've maybe had a wine or two maybe threfoufive hiccup

Read my posts.ive addressed what op is raising
He needs to treat both daughters equally.make adequate provision for outings
He needs to cut the wisecracks
Him and ex need to be consistent re diet,clothing etc
And yes there are four in the relationship,two children whom should be equally held in regard

You're doing it on purpose now . . .

Mummy like i said Keep reading scottisshmummys posts if you feel you are starting to waver or change your mind because those are very likely the kinds of attitudes you will come up against for the next 18 years.

Slurp your wine and continue with parrott quips
All the online yo go girl.aye very good.then what?....when mn arent cheering you on
The reality of it is,its a very difficult and fraught relationship if you've left him

Lol. To be fair I think Polly wants a cracker

arf

Can I join in with a ?

Ok,then practicalities.the house you and him reside in,is it joint names?or his name
Do you work?joint finances or your own money?
If you leave him do you have adequate support

Jeesh, it's half ten, can't we all just relax a bit now!

Beddybyes for me.

scottish if it becomes "difficult and fraught" because she has left him there are laws that will protect her. The Protection From Harassment one for a start.

OP, you just enjoy your evening with your friend. You have plenty of time to think about what you want to do. The longer the better, in fact. Let him care for his own daughter, a swift dose of reality and plenty of it will not go amiss.

Withdraw completely and go non contact for a few days. He will just have to cope exactly like you have been doing with no thanks other than idiotic quips for far too long. You have made some realisations in the last 24 hours and you need time to process them.

Have a chat to your mum when you can. Talk it out with RL friends and gather your support. Take your time to examine how you want your life to be, and whether staying with this pillock will be a helpful contribution to that or not.

What AF said

Goodnight dozie

Op hasnt indicated harassment.at all.she said flurry of txt.that she ignored

What darkesteyes said