my daughter hates her name Sophia as too common and wants to change it

[wills1939]

Hi

My daughter is five years old and wants to change her name. She hates her name because everyone is called Sophia. she has a point but I didn't call her It because was popular but because it was my grandmother's name. I understand why she hates it. There are three in her class, two In her swimming class, one newly born cousin and my my friend's dog.

She has already started telling everyone her name Is Margaret (her middle name after my other grandmother). When I told her that I loved her name etc and it suited her, she cried and told me that she was fed up of being the same as everyone else and would rather an ugly name than a pretty, boring one.

At the moment, I have refused. Am I being unreasonable? She us nit a drama queen or anything. generally she us a really good girl she us just really upset about being called Sophia. But I really loved my nan.

Listen to her. Definitely let her use her middle name - it's her name your feelings about your grandmother aren't relevant sorry. I adored my grandmother and she was an amazing woman, one of first women to go to oxford, family breadwinner etc but she had a hideous first name I would never have lumbered either daughter with and nor would she have wanted me to! You can remember her without bringing your dd into it.

I know several people who use their middle names, their actual names are laughably inappropriate for them and just don't suit them albeit perfectly decent names.

I think it's unusual for a child to consistently and strongly reject their name. She sounds great op! Fwiw I much prefer margaret never understood the appeal of sophie/a not a strong sound at all.

I have 1 of those names not as nice as sophia though but I 3 in my class at school and knew dozens in high school I hated it stuck with it anyway say to her sophia im sorry you dont like your name you can call yourself what you like but dont change it legally on her whims she is 5

Why not? I can't see the harm. When my DD was 5 she started calling herself Jojo- which bears little resemblance to her real name but we used it at her request. She is a teenager now and her friends call her by her real name, but Jojo is still an affectionate family name we use at home.

Thanks for all the mice posts. Guess am over thinking everything at moment. My mum Is really ill and Sophia was her mum's name. I just I dunno. Guess it us more than the name issue really. first my nan, now my mum.

Oh and as for being badly written. I'm upset about a lot of things at the moment. checking my post fir mistakes from my oh one Is really not up there on my priorities!!!

More mistakes! You know what, I just don't care!

My colleague's son changed to using his middle name aged 7. Still using it 20+ years later. Don't fall out with her over this. Sophia's a lovely name but I prefer Margaret to Fifi.

Sorry to hear about your mum op

I went through this phase at a similar age. I wanted to be called Brigita (sp?), as in one of the Von Trap daughters after becoming obsessed with the film.

My mum flatly ignored my requests and I still bear the name I was given by my parents at birth. Thank god!

To be honest, I don't think Margaret is a great swap for Sophia and doubt she will at 15/25 ever acknowledge that she didn't like Sophia.

I had no idea Sophia was so popular though. I've never met one! It must be a regional thing. I know a lot of Sophie's but they're all mid twenties, as am I.

It is a beautiful name, keep it.
Nobody is called Sophia where I live, maybe you just need to move.

Try not to take it personally. I agree with KERALA when she says it's her name your feelings about your grandmother aren't relevant sorry.

When I told my parents I was officially changing my names they told me that it was ok because although they had given them to me because they liked them, the moment that they had given them to me they were then mine to do with whatever I wanted.

If your DD (and she sounds wonderfully strong minded btw) wants Margaret then go with it, if she decides on another name then let her. You don't have t do anything official.

Quite a lot of people are known by their middle names. She is still choosing a name you chose for her - presumably you liked Margaret quite a bit to make it her middle name.

I'd let her go by Margaret and see where you get to. You don't have to do anything officially now, or indeed ever, if you, and later she, don't want to.

Yes, I have only known 2 Sophia's. I do not know who Princess Sophia from Disney is, and I am assuming your dd has NOT seen the film

DD is a Jessica.

There were 4 in her class.
6 in her year.

She liked that, though. Liked the fact that the teacher had lots of little girls to call Jessica.

I had so many aliases growing up. I even wrote them on family photos which at least helps date them. Mine had no connection to my real name and were linked to ghastly slebs. Maybe be glad she doesn't want to change her surname name to Kardashian ( I wonder what North West will prefer to be called!)

She's going for a variation of her own name. I would leave her to it. Making a big deal make her feel even more extreme.

Sorry you're having such a tough time though Wills!

Don't know a single Sophia so maybe regional.
She's five. She'll change her mind and demands a thousand times.

A friend of mine went by his middle name for most of his childhood but switched back to his first name as an adult. It never caused any issues (maybe the odd birthday card using the wrong name).

He didn't like his first name when he was little because it sounded like robbers and robbers were frightening .

She is certainly old enough to decide to be called by her middle name, and there won't be many Margarets around. Maybe you could shorten it to Maggie or Meg if that would suit her?
Go with it, she wants to be different from the crowd, which is not a bad thing. So your grandmothers name becomes her middle name.
Having the same name as 3 other people in the class can be really annoying.
She isn't insisting on being called Esmeralda, UpsyDaisy or Horace, after all!

A misunderstanding op! I meant my post was badly written- so sorry You have misunderstood- read it back and you will see what I mean. don't give a fig about any

(See I am on phone). Don't care about spelling anyway and yours was fine. Bit mortified that you misunderstood me. All I wanted to do was reassure you that changing her name is ok at 5 but take into account your feelings too.

Too tired to read whole thread, sorry, but I would let her call herself Margaret if it makes her happy.

On a tangent.

I am almost completely convinced that North West isn't her real name and they just use it because 1) everyone joked about it when KK was pregnant 2) so much more press attention.

Reckon she's called something completely normal, by the family and their friends.

Outing myself here. That's my name.....

As an adult it's often commented on, positively. She's saying this through circumstance not because of your choice. I was named after a great aunt and as a (sentimental) adult now I doubly love why. Pick a similar nickname thar doesn't warrant a field of explanation when she may want to reverse her decision. As a child I was affectionately called fifi or fifi-em (m being middle name initial too, ironically) but it naturally morphed back as an adult.

I only know 2 Sophia's. One is a baby, the other a teenager. Love that name. Personally I would humour her for a while. Children go through loads of phases and she is very young.

Dd's name went from incredibly rare to top 3 names in the 2 years after she was born. I was so fed up about it!!! No point in dwelling on it though, I still love her name, she is neutral about it. If I'd known it would be so popular I'd have picked another name but there you go.

Let her use Margaret - it is her name after all, just her middle one!