Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to be a guarantor to a loan that DW's friend and husband want to take out.

271 replies

BreakingDad77 · 07/08/2014 12:11

I am aware they are not good with money (Im not amazing but are not anywhere near CCJ/default) and already have court collections on money they own. They need this to bridge the time till the DW friend goes back to work after maternity leave, supposedly they are short for rent and need 5-6k.

DW says we not at risk but I have told her that I believe that say they default then they would come after us and because we wouldn't be able to manage that extra then it would get put on our house.

I dont like the idea of money between friends like this.

OP posts:
Flipflops7 · 07/08/2014 12:40

Wouldn't do it for anyone.

eddielizzard · 07/08/2014 12:41

of course there's a risk! otherwise why would they need you?

don't do it.

LittlePeaPod · 07/08/2014 12:41

Don't do it. You will be liable if they default.

Your DW's friend should just go back to work early if they can't afford it.

whatever5 · 07/08/2014 12:42

No way would I guarantee a loan for a friend, especially not one who has a history of defaulting. I would only do that for my children (and even then only if I trusted them to repay the loan).

You would be mad to do this for your friends and I think it is really bad of them to put you in a such an awkward position.

firesidechat · 07/08/2014 12:42

I wouldn't do it for someone who was good with money and I certainly wouldn't do it for someone I knew to be bad with money.

It has disaster written all over it.

DoJo · 07/08/2014 12:42

I am another one who doesn't understand how they can need this money to pay their rent whilst she's on maternity leave - unless they are living somewhere seriously expensive, that surely represents most of their rent for six months? So have they not budgeted for maternity leave at all?

Chiana · 07/08/2014 12:43

YANBU! Your friendship will end up ruined and the 6K will end up adding to your mortgage debt.

Aussiemum78 · 07/08/2014 12:45

If you wouldn't personally hand them 5000 out of your own savings, then don't do it.

This is not the first time they had financial issues, and it won't be the last. Some people just never get their budgets in order and live within their means.

By all means, help with bud getting, help them to sell anything they can, maybe help find work for them, but don't guarantee their debt.

EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 07/08/2014 12:46

You'd be fucking insane to consider this.

campingfilth · 07/08/2014 12:47

No bloody way would I do this. She just needs to go back to work earlier which is exactly what I had to do. Christ the cheek of some people plus why are there family not being guarantors???? That in itself says a lot.

Branleuse · 07/08/2014 12:48

just say no way. Dont budge. You dont need to explain yourself

Aussiemum78 · 07/08/2014 12:48

Out of curiosity,

Does the dh have a second job?
Do they run a second car?
Do they buy things like expensive clothes on credit?
Could they live in a cheaper home?
Why did they default previously? What's changed?

MehsMum · 07/08/2014 12:51

Another one telling you not to. As others have said, you're liable if they default.

Enb76 · 07/08/2014 12:52

Absolutely not. You are in effect, loaning them 5k out of your own money. The lender is not taking the risk, you are.

You only ever lend money you can afford to lose and it doesn't sound to me like you can afford to throw away 5k

badtime · 07/08/2014 12:53

Not at risk!?? Confused

YANBU - I wouldn't do this for anyone, even if I was 100% sure they were responsible and conscientious and would pay me back (they might get hit by a bus or whatever, and I might be wrong!)

Blueuggboots · 07/08/2014 12:53

I wouldn't even ask a family member to do this for me, you must be REALLY good friends??!
Absolutely don't do it!

Blueuggboots · 07/08/2014 12:55

And just for the record, a friend of mine was a guarantor for a work colleague, who proceeded to swan off to Australia without paying his debts and the debt company wiped out her entire monthly wages without even warning her - that's what she signed up for.
she got him back by contacting immigration and telling them about the criminal convictions he'd forgotten to mention on his application for residency

AnAirOfHope82 · 07/08/2014 12:55

No.

rpitchfo · 07/08/2014 12:57

I think you should do it.

Yours,
F. Goodwin.

ajandjjmum · 07/08/2014 12:59

No way!

Like your friend's style Blue!

FatherReboolaConundrum · 07/08/2014 13:01

How could anyone think you're not at risk? Shock That's the whole point of a guarantor - that the institution lending the money sees that someone regards the borrower as reliable enough to stake their own money on it.

What would being a guarantor mean otherwise?

WooWooOwl · 07/08/2014 13:01

Don't do it. Friends who actually give a shit about you would never ask you to put yourself in this position.

Marnierose · 07/08/2014 13:02

I don't think a real friend would even ask.

middlings · 07/08/2014 13:04

Absolutely no way on God's good green should you even consider doing this. Even if they were the most solvent people on the face of the Earth. No good can come of it.

Now, I would take this thread and go and show it to your DW.

Good God what a horrific idea.

KirstyJC · 07/08/2014 13:04

Hell no!