To not really want my DSes to see their Aunties' boobs!

[Lemonheart]

Have NC because this is quite specific!

Next year, my DM celebrates a big birthday. She is planning a party for all the family in a hall with a disco, a live band ... and burlesque.

The burlesque troupe is run by DSis2, and also includes DSis1 and our cousin. They are very good at what they do, singing, dancing, pole dancing etc, but there is an obvious sexual undertone to all of this, and they do strip down to being topless apart from masking tape on their nipples. I should add that I have no problem with this and am very proud of them and don't think I am particularly prudish!

But DM intends for the burlesque to go on in between the live band's sets, meaning it won't just be late night entertainment, it will be on throughout her party, including when the kids are there. I have 3 DSes, and the youngest two are 3 and 1, so I doubt it will have much impact on them, but the eldest will be coming up to 7 and I just don't know what he will make of it. I might sound like I'm pearly clutching now, but I just don't think it's appropriate entertainment for a family party.

Seeing my sisters' boobs will be a bit weird for DH (he made a yik face when I told him!), and there will be aunts, uncles and grandparents there, plus DSis's own DS. It's a show that is designed to titillate, how is that appropriate when the guests are all family?

I understand that my DM is proud of my DSisters and I haven't said anything yet. I just want to know if I am being ridiculous and small minded first. WIBU to ask DM to schedule the burlesque show for the end of the evening so I can take my DSes home to bed first?

I suspect it will cause a bit of a row if I say anything, and I am sure I will be accused of being jealous and prudish.

Am I?

God, no! What a weird thing to perform at a family party!!

I might be called a prude but I would be really uncomfortable with the whole thing. Burlesque can be Sp beautiful, but I still wouldn't want to watch a family member do it, whilst surrounded by other family members! The whole thing is so weird!

If you aren't happy for your dses to see it, could you find childcare if they won't change the schedule?

How bizarre.

Ha. I thought this was going to be about breast feeding.
YANBU

So not Sp.

Definitely nbu. I'm cringing just thinking about it.

The owl, so did I. I was all ready to tell the op to get over it.

It's not really family entertainment. I'd be missing that part of the party I think.

It's strange of your sister to want to do that in front of others kids and husbands. Boundaries messy...

As for being accused of being jealous.....that's just weird....

Wow! Yanbu. Burlesque at a family party, attended by kids, and performed by members of the family? There is very little that is less appropriate than that.

Maybe for later on but not during.

Got to admit, not sure where this penchant for burlesque has come from in recent years. Glorified stripping under a veil of 'empowerment, not titillation'. Sorry ladies, but any blokes watching you aren't thinking 'there goes an empowered woman', more likely 'phwoarrr!'. No thanks.

A family party is definitely an inappropriate venue for a burlesque show especially when the performers are family, yuck!

YANBU at all. I'm no prude either, but find that rather bizarre for a family party.

You have an interesting point there, Koothrapanties. It wouldn't and hasn't bothered me for my DSes to watch me or my sisters breastfeeding. This feels different though, because of the sexual context perhaps? I feel like people seeing breastfeeding is a positive thing that will help people overcome shyness about doing it themselves.

I am glad that so far people agree with me. I may well look into childcare if the schedule won't change. I'll have to steel myself and bring it up with DM I think.

I love Burlesque and have went to a fair few shows and have done fan dancing classes and such (and was almost a go go dancer at a couple but fell ill) but there is a reason that these shows are usually 18+.

I don't think YABU at all, DP and I planned to have something along these lines for our wedding when it finally happens but it will be strictly at night after the kids have gone!

This isn't the first time this has happened actually. My DSis performed at her own engagement party too. I was in hospital at the time so I didn't attend and my DSes were much younger. I remember my dad saying he felt weirded out by it then too.

Masking tape?! Very alluring

Eurgh...wtf?

Gobbin Most burlesque usually revolves around a comedy routine and most women doing it, do it because they have a love for it, not because they are being exploited. Lots of male burlesque acts too.

Schro I didn't say that burlesque artistes are being exploited. I have a colleague who does burlesque. There's no getting away from it though, it's dancing and taking your clothes off. It's not something I think appropriate for a family party and I do question why people want to get their clothes off on stage, it's not something I would want to go and watch .

Hmm have all the extended family seen them perform before?

Given that it's preached on here there's nothing wrong with people seeing breasts and nipples I don't see why people should now find a problem with this. A thread the other day was moaning over why women can't be topless like men and plenty of people agreed with this.

I would have thought there'll be more there than just your 7 year old not really want to see this performance.

Everyone stop and think about your aunties doing burlesque. Is that something you'd quite like to see?

Maybe you could ask them to tone it down to a pg rating as there are kids there, I can understand DM being proud but there should be certain amount of responsibility on what the kids are seeing. It's a bit weird being a family event. My mate who's male and gay, for his 40ths birthday hired a burlesque performer, and I thought that was weird being a mainly gay party plus females invited.

Yep, posh stripping by woman not being exploited is still stripping, and stripping can be beautiful and artistic, but never suitable for children.

In the same way I have a shelf full of DVDs (old school me) that have won Oscars, other awards and great critical aclaim, I consider them to be works of art, yet if they have 15 and 18 certificates, i wouldn't consider them to be acceptable to show children.

get childcare, or decline altogether. You respect that it's an artform, htat doesn't make it child-friendly.

I'm struggling to understand how your mother or your sisters can think that burlesque would be appropriate entertainment at a family party. You'd be doing all of them a huge favour if you could persuade them out of this! The idea of your sisters twirling seductively around in front of the assembled extended family and friends is really grim. I'm imagining most of the guests feeling mortified with embarrassment, but unable to leave because it would be rude.