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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend walked out of restaurant without paying

456 replies

GermanHouseCat · 31/07/2014 20:13

NC for this. Long time MNetter, been on the site for years. Promise!

I went out last night with a friend and his brother and girlfriend. The friend lives abroad and is back for a few days so it was a nice chance to see him.

They had already eaten when I arrived (an independent gastro bar with table service) and then together we had a round of drinks before planning to move on to another bar.

We asked for the bill, which included the total of the food/drinks they had before I arrived and then the one round of drinks we had together.

When it arrived, friend said "let's just walk out, shall we?" Before I could even fathom what he meant, his DB and GF had agreed and they stood up and walked out.

I was completely Shock Shock and had to make a split second decision about what to do. The bill was large and I couldn't afford to pay it all - nor felt morally at the time that I should - I put the money on the table for my drink and left feeling mortified.

I am usually very assertive but I was just so shocked I didn't know how to handle it. I'm ashamed to admit it but I didn't call them up on it (they were all so cool about doing it) so en route to the next bar I feigned illness and came home.

It can't be a money thing, DF and his GF both have very good jobs, the brother is working.

AIBU to be absolutely mortified at being part of this? I feel that they have implicated me in this and any repercussions. Should I have paid the lot? Should I call the bar and give them DF's details?

OP posts:
nevereverpost · 03/08/2014 07:49

Darkesteyes you obviously use those eyes to be bloody perceptive.

Well said!

nevereverpost · 03/08/2014 07:58

Should clarify: obviously what you are saying is conjecture and supposition...but it is intelligent and perceptive supposition Grin

QuintessentiallyQS · 03/08/2014 11:13

Indeed!

GermanHouseCat · 03/08/2014 20:33

Evening All

Heard today from a mutual friend that the bar manager called DF's Mum and told her the story. She was mortified, got straight on the phone to DF and his brother and made them pay up.

Not sure where he got the number from, I only gave her address as it's the last one I have for DF and his brother.

Imagine, 32 and 28 years old and having to be taught right from wrong by your Mum. Hmm

Anyway, I can't see DF in the same way any more. As far as I'm concerned, the friendship (which was drifting anyway since he moved abroad) is over.

OP posts:
Bunbaker · 03/08/2014 21:10

Thanks for the update. I hope there are no repercussions for you, but I'm glad it has been sorted.

Lottiedoubtie · 03/08/2014 21:11

Grin excellent, good on the mother! Hope that's taught them some consideration for others, but either way you're well rid!

Passmethecrisps · 03/08/2014 21:21

Good work!

I bet he is no longer trotting out the 'no big deal' line

Bunbaker · 03/08/2014 21:21

Three cheers for the mum.

GermanHouseCat · 03/08/2014 21:22

I know! She is absolutely lovely so it's a shame she had to get involved, but it got the job done. Apparently they got a massive bollocking.

OP posts:
GermanHouseCat · 03/08/2014 21:23

You're never too old to be told off by your Mum! Grin

OP posts:
stealthsquiggle · 03/08/2014 21:45

Good on their mum, and what a shame the bar manager felt the need to have a go at you, OP, given that you did in fact give him the means to get the money back.

sinisterfish · 03/08/2014 21:47

why wouldn't the manager have a go at the op, she should have stuck it on her credit card at least.

thieves all round

MarthasHarbour · 03/08/2014 21:49

apparently they got a massive bollocking. You are never too old to be told off by your mum

What a fantastic conclusion! Grin

MarthasHarbour · 03/08/2014 21:51

sinisterfish FFS this has been done and dusted Hmm

QuintessentiallyQS · 03/08/2014 21:53

Good one, mum! Grin

sinisterfish · 03/08/2014 21:53

please don't ffs me.

i read the ops posts and she did say 'Should I have paid the lot?'

just think she should have !

Darkesteyes · 03/08/2014 21:54

Thanks for the update German.

I hope the embarrassment of being told off by their mum at that age has made those gits take a long hard look at themselves.

GermanHouseCat · 03/08/2014 21:54

sinister would you care to elaborate on your description of me as a thief please? On the basis that I paid for my own consumption and latterly helped the vendor recover the funds owing I believe that to be rather inaccurate.

Why would a c£100 loss to me (i.e. paying for the consumption of others) be more palatable than a loss to another party?

To support your answer, please be aware that I do not have a credit card and did not have enough in my current account to cover the bill.

OP posts:
QuintessentiallyQS · 03/08/2014 21:55

Why should she pay more than the one drink she had? After all she joined them after they had eaten. No way would these thieving bastards paid her back! This way nobody lost out, and they got to pay, and they got bollocked by mum.

duchesse · 03/08/2014 21:55

So serves them right! Way worse for them than any other outcome. Grin

QuintessentiallyQS · 03/08/2014 21:56

I bet sinistherfish is the exfriend! Wink (or somebody in the habit of letting others pay for his/her food on a regular basis, perhaps?)

Darkesteyes · 03/08/2014 21:56

Thanks never and Quint Thanks

emotionsecho · 03/08/2014 22:00

Great update OP, clearly mum didn't think it was "no biggie" and "just a laugh", would be good if they apologise to you but I wouldn't hold your breath.Smile

MarthasHarbour · 03/08/2014 22:02

sinister I stand by my FFS as you called the OP a thief which was bang out of order. Also if you had read the entire thread (not just the OP posts) you would see tgat this has been covered.

Anyway OP has put it far more eloquently than me.

sinisterfish · 03/08/2014 22:03

you were part of the group. i guess i just would have done something other than run out with them, they weren't kids

it's like taking a cab then running off, you just don't really do it

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