To not understand why some parents think that having a tall child makes them a superior parent?

[coppingpandy]

Has anyone else noticed this? Some parents go on and on about having a tall child, as if it makes them better than everyone else, or as if it's because of something they've done parenting-wise.

I have noticed it both on here and in real life.

My DD's best friend has always been a fraction taller than DD, and for the past 7 years since they became friends at pre-school, her mum has not stopped going on about it. She mentions it all the time, as if it's medal-worthy that her DD is the tallest of the pair!

My DS is the youngest in his class, and so is quite small compared to lots of other children who are almost a year older than him. The mum of a very tall boy in his class is always mentioning the fact that DS is small and that her DS is so much taller. Again as if she deserves a bloody medal for her child being tall!

AIBU to think it's strange?

(Cue lots of parents protesting "But my child really is tall)

Nelly my mum is 5.1 and my Dad 6.4 too! When people ask her "how tall are you?" she says "5.9" with a blank expression.

I think the only time I talk about DD1's height is when someone else comments. Generally because some people are surprised when they find out her age, having assumed she's older. But she's very articulate, something I am quite pleased about, so can come across as older than she is.

She's only 4 though so it can change. DD2 is much more like me physically - shorter and rounder. And she is equally as wonderful as her elder sister.

I realise that it's genetics that dictate height and am quite surprised that people see it as something to be proud of. There's nothing I've done differently when rearing them to make one child tall and the other more average in height. You can't take credit for DNA, can you

So many people comment on my dds height for the opposite reason - she is pretty short! she is 30 months and about 81cm so below 0.4th centile. People think its hilarious to compare her to their 14 month olds for example and talk about how she will need toddler clothes to start school.
It wasnt too bad until it got to the point where there may actually be a problem causing her lack of growth and now i just feel like slapping everyone who makes a short comment even though I know that WOULD be totally unreasonable!

There are times when I mention my sons' height. It might be in a situation why I 'm explaining they're doing something they're "too old" for, but this would generally be with people I don't know.

With people I do know, it might me in an exasperated "oh god, MORE new trousers required" kind of way.

Incidentally, I was always (in that idealistic way you are before having children) adamant I would never discipline them physically. It became apparent when they were very young that even if I HAD wanted to, I'd have been physically unable to once they reached a certain age anyway due to their size.

Both my dds are tall. The only time I ever mention it is when people give them funny looks for doing age appropriate things. Do was deemed too tall for the soft play places near us at the age of 8 while her cousin was still small enough at 12, it wasn't fair and certainly wasn't something to boast about. Dd2 is just 4 and has often been called lazy for riding in the buggy, that started when she was 2, I definitely couldn't have made her walk everywhere we go back then.

I'm sure I've read studies where they have said that being more 'average' in height is healthier in the long run. Shorter men are meant to live longer.

I am friends with a guy who is 6ft 7 and has a defined stoop because he was always trying to appear shorter and not bang his head. I also agree that height before puberty is no great indicator of height after the hormones have kicked in. I was always talk, hit puberty and many of my classmates overtook me. I kept thinking I would have a second growth spurt but nope.

*tall

oh totally get this! I'm not tall but my children are taller than their classmates (tall father) and I get praised for this 'achievement'.

yes, sebsmummy, no back problems for one. everybody i knwo with back trouble is tall.

Oh and I have been known to carry DS1's passport if I know we'll be going anywhere with a "kids eat free" bit.

Well the amount of women that harp on about only dating tall men, I'd say having a tall child will pretty much guarantee their success in life.

Have never seen this either in RL or on MN.

The only time I find reference to height on MN is when an OP is complaining that everyone else keeps saying "Aren't they tall/small?" and are usually upset about it, so it's hardly a boast.

Children are often competitive about being tall though. And they tend to measure themselves against others with the sloping line that shows that they are in fact taller than the other despite being 2" or more smaller.

"when your tall child is next to a smaller child, you swell with pride".

HOLY fuck that is weird. My kids are gorgeous and smart and good company. I don't think that being taller necessarily 'trumps' their attributes. boysclothes what you've typed is dreadful!

I dont know anyone who boast about child height.

I do however get a lot of comments about DS. So hes off the top of the charts in the red book, but does that really mean that every other person we meet either has to comment about his height or make some nasty comment because he's not "doing x like he should at his age" (when they assume hes 4-5 intead of just about 2! They always back track then but its still horrible).

I actually think being lots taller than your friends is a major negative. I was always tall and so was dh (in year 7 we were tallest at the school). It means you get lots of nasty comments, if a group of you do something wrong its you who gets picked out of the crowd. It can make you feel like an outsider. I wish my son had been average height but chances were always going to be slim when both sides of the family are tall.

nellynoodle1 that's outrageous! you can bet she felt jealous of you, your youth, that her son was spending time with you.......... just a little dig to make you feel inferior. she's probably a mil from hell, somebody else's thankfully huh!?

I find this all the time with one particular mum friend. Her son is 14 months old.
'The HV says he's going to be tall'
'He's got big feet which means he's going to be tall'
'He weighs a lot, but he isn't fat, it's because he's going to be tall'

Makes me want to slap her. Not because her son isn't tall or because that's a bad/good thing, it's just because my DC is much smaller so she IS saying it to have a dig. So utterly boring.

I have never ever come across this. As a mother of a tall child I never mention it. It is usually other people mentioning it to me

Striped I should imagine the mother is saying it to justify why her child is heavy and big. It dpesnt sound like a dig to me.

Growing up I experienced it the other way around. I was always taller than my best friends and got used to hearing people saying how small and cute they were. I wanted to be the same as them and I felt left out.

Silly and daft I know, but it's how I felt.

I've never heard people overly boasting about their child's height since I've been a parent.

Aw ffs, is height another thing we are not allowed to casually mention now.

They should give out a handbook in th maternity wards to say keep all conversations to the weather and nothing else!

I have talked to other mothers about loads of stuff to do with my child and never felt anyone was being competitive!

I know what you mean!! My brother is 19 and 6'5. My mum never shuts up about it! I just feel badly done to. How come I'm only 5'4!!!?

My own DD turns 1 tomorrow so she will be one of the youngest in her year. My cousin's daughter will be 2 in September and will be in the same academic year as my DD.

I look at them and can't quite believe that they are going to be in the same year.

Must admit I do bang on about my daughters eyelashes! They are huge and she has beautiful big blue eyes but I think every parent thinks their children are beautiful

How odd. Never come across this at all. Mine are all freakish giants (like me) so it's not exactly news to me that they are taller than most other people.

I'd much rather boast about how brilliantly intelligent, beautiful, successful my children are... Sadly I can't.

I think that there is a flip side of this is that some people are waaaaaay to sensitive and read quite innocent comments via a paranoid/defensive parenting lens.

So "DD is very tall for her age" - which is probably a statement of FACT (would be in my case anyway) gets warped into "oh they are being competitive parents and are slurring my short/averaged height child. Do they want a medal as their child is tall?".

So "DD's feet are growing so fast, it is costing me a fortune in shoes" - again another statement of fact, is warped into "Oh she is having a dig at my child, boasting about her childs massive feet." really?

I read the OP as a bit of a defensive overly sensitive whine rather than a comment on a real actual issue.

copping how can you say you don't care about height at all, when you started a thread asking if YABU to whine about parents who talk about their tall children's height!!