For being upset that neighbour did this?

[cherrylola]

This is long sorry!...
My friend is also a close neighbour. She and her DP feed our cat if we are away at weekends (we return the favour and do the same for their cat). We came home earlier than expected today to find our tumble dryer on, house full of steam, soaking wet kitchen floor etc from no ventilation and no power. It turns out the friends had put their washing in our machine because it got wet in the rain on the line. The machine must've tripped the power so our fridge was off (caught it just in time to save contents). So, I figured out it must be their stuff in the machine, checked my phone but no text or anything to ask of they could use it. A couple hours later the DP knocks on door armed with washing basket. Queue awkward oh didn't think you'd be home yet, urm used your machine, washing got wert and we had two loads (so clearly this isn't even the ONLY load they've dried here today!!). Us going uhh yeah we figured that out. He goes down stairs to get stuff and has the cheek to call up stairs and say it's not dry can I put it back on? I'm gobsmacked, DP just awkwardly says 'urm yeah ok'. He buggers off home with a 'I'll be back in an hour then' grinning. Queue the power cutting out. So I text him to tell him to come and get his washing.
I'm totally creeped out. Just how long have they been doing this??? Why didn't they just ask first? It's really freaked me out, what else do they do when they know we aren't home???
There is history, he also took our lawn mower without asking when we were away last summer, broke a part so had to fess up and replace the broken part.
Also, we came home a coupe of months ago to no power and had to chick and entire fridge and freezer's worth of food in the bin (£150 plus waste!). Is it because of them using our machine that the power tripped out!!???!!
I just don't know what to do, feel I have to say something but don't want to cause a falling out but I feel like they have been really creepy and dishonest

Yep I know I'm happy with the apology and dropping any grudges now!

Hmmm. I'd have preferred an apology face to face, but let's give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they were too ashamed to do that.

Arsepaste, I really don't think the OP was arsey to them –even if you think she was, it was totally justified and their behaviour was MUCH worse.

I think it's an okay first step apology but would hope that some flowers/wine/chocs etc appear on your doorstep later!

Now, I say this as someone who is SO arsey that they have ARSE in their username, but I do think the OP was arsey to the wife when she came round with the keys. Like, I say, it was understandable under the circs, but the passive aggressive reply to the text, and thinking he's an idiot now does sound like a grudge forming.

I appreciate I am an arsey cow sometimes, I do, and this really is minimal arse behaviour! I won't go any further and I take back my comment about him being an arse after the texts, it was very heat of the moment thinking/typing that and I'm over it now.

In my defence ArsePaste I didn't sleep last night for being so upset about it!

Oh, I know! And I would have been the same, tbh. A night's brooding never does you any good. You've got the keys back, you're getting your electrics sorted and they've apologised. hopefully you'll sleep easier tonight!

Outing myself a bit here but my dc does an activity and we go to an event each year stay the weekend in a hotel/b and b type place etc. last year we booked payed deposits etc about 10 months in advance and then about 2 months before got informed the hotel had burned down. Bit of an inconvenience but we managed to rebook elsewhere.
Hotel owner had gone out leaving tumble drier on and it had gone up in flames. Owners lost everything in the fire including pets and personal possessions and are now bankrupt and homeless because insurance didn't pay up as they went out leaving drier on.

This is outrageous! I dont leave the tumble drier on if i am not in the house. A friends caught fire and it was just luck that she noticed before she left the house. She'd forgotten something and went back to find flames coming from the top.

No YANBU, they are well out of order. They should have called / texted to ask first (I'm almost certain you'll probably have a mobile?)

A mate of mine is a firefighter and before going out he switches off EVERY non essential plug in the house. Literally everything bar the fridge freezer and central heating systems.
Despite his assertions that domestic appliance faults were the number one cause of house fires in the UK, we all laughed and ribbed him for years.

One day a few years ago, one of our group had her tumbler catch fire when it was unattended (she'd left it on while out walking the dogs). Luckily it was in an outbuilding not the main house but the outbuilding was almost totally destroyed. The tumbler, washing machine, freezer, power tools / mowers etc were all gone - several thousand pounds of damage. Luckily she was just back in time to get her horse out of the adjoining stable, could have been a lot worse.

I am still not quite as anal as my pal about switching things off but I would never go out and leave the washing machine, tumbler dryer, oven, dishwasher etc on. Never.

I think some degree of arsiness was necessary and appropriate in the circumstances.

they help you out by using OP's machine and electricity? Only by the power cutting out was the risk of the place going up in a fire averted? Super.

Ceresier that thread is outrageous!!

Glad it's resolved and you said something. Amazing cheek!!

Im so glad you said something OP but you know this is not the first time, and they left you to clean up the mess and take the hit financially.

Some 'friends'...

I know whiteblossom I certainly won't be letting anything like this happen again! Going to let our 'friendship' cool as someone here suggested I think and keep it to a work relationship. If it had been the first time it may be different but after the mower getting taken last year and now this (and mainly the fact that we just can't ever be sure that they haven't taken the piss behind our backs more often) I can't let it go on. I will refuse to be treated like a mug!

I really couldn't trust them again and would probably change the lock. They took a huge liberty letting themselves in and helping themselves like that. What else did they borrow/use?!!

I know its disappointing when you find someone isn't the person you thought they were but you're right to cool the relationship.

Get rid of the cat, then they wont need to come into your house anymore

I had a neighbor/friend we used to pet sit for each other. Id scuttle in feed her animals and scuttle out,felt strange being in her house when she wasnt there.

I discovered after many years that she used to use my key to let herself in and help herself to anything from my pantry or freezer if she had run out and needed it for whatever she was cooking

She was joking when she moved about what was she gonna do now as the supermarket was closer to her new house than I was,that was the first I knew shed had been doing this ( all those years I just figured I was getting forgetful when I went to get something from the pantry and it wasnt there ) It had actually become a family joke as in" bugger i could have sworn I had a tin of whatever bugger." than have to drive to supermarket to get said item Id have sworn I actually had

Oh this has reminded me.
My neighbour used to feed my cat when we went away (she offered)
We went away one weekend and on the way home I was looking forward to a glass all of the nearly full bottle of wine in the fridge.
When I got it out of the fridge there was about half an inch left