To think not being able to drive puts you at a disadvantage?

[Sparklingbrook]

Just been chatting to a friend. Her daughter is 17 and although they can afford for her to have lessons, and she is able to she isn't going to bother learning to drive.

I was thinking about all the things I wouldn't have been able to do if I couldn't drive. For a start DS1 wouldn't be at the school he is, and the jobs I had I couldn't have got to by public transport.

I know she could learn in the future but surely it's easier to do it when young and a bit fearless?

I know it's none of my business too, but I hope my two DSs will be able to learn when the time comes.

Plus I very carefully worded the OP to say that my friend could afford the lessons and her DD was able to. Because I knew people would say about the expense and that some people medically weren't able to.

All DS1's friends live between 6 and 24 miles away. He moved schools because of some issues that couldn't be resolved. the only reason we could move him is because I could drive him the 6 miles to the bus stop.

As a non driver i would recommend all other non drivers moving to Milton Keynes just to experience the utter bewilderment of the natives when you tell them you don't drive. Audible gasps and whispers from colleagues, tutting, muttering, head shaking, people stammering 'what?' as the full horrible realisation hits them of what you have just said. The place is a temple for the car worshippers.

I would imagine MK has a brilliant public transport network MrsK.

YANBU

However, my 'rents did the 'You're 17 you must learn to drive' thing, and I didn't take to it, wasnt' interested at all-I went to university at 18 and gave up on it totally as I lived near the centre. I was used to public transport.

When I hit my early twenties I learned, I was ready then,and I passed first time. I think you need to feel ready, and 17 is young, but to keep an eye on the calender.

I LOVE driving even now, I love being able to just get wherever I want without bothering anybody else.

DP doesn't drive and it is a bit of an issue if I'm honest. He will get himself to his own errands, will use trains etc...but I often feel a bit fed up of being the one on days/nights out who drives every time. Sometimes I really don't feel like it, or want to get sozzled I'm tired and would rather he drove for a change!

I must admit that the thought of my DS1 being behind the wheel of a car in 2 year's time is a little scary, however keen I am for him to do it.

Only time will tell if he will.

It's a vital life skill. Being unable to drive cuts you ofv from a huge adventure

Of course it isn't usual, I don't think that for a minute.

We have one High School half a mile away and that is it. No choices here.

We live in rural west Wales , local transport ( bus stop a quarter of a mile away , unlit road , no pavement ) is rubbish
DS learnt to drive at age 17 , and at 19 and waiting to start Uni , would be at a loss without that driving licence .
DD will be 17 in the summer , and will be learning to drive ASAP
Yes , where we live not driving would be a big disadvantage

Those of you who have complain about having to drive on nights out, can't you just get a taxi? Aren't there any pubs or restaurants in walking distance? That's what we do if DH wants to drink on a night out, just as he would if he wasn't married to me! I'm not going to make him drive and not drink on my behalf

The bus service is quite good Sparkling, but all routes go long ways round all the little places on the way into town. You often have to go in to go out if that makes sense.

But it's not the transport system that's difficult, it's the people who live there. I've never met such a group of car obsessed people anywhere else (except maybe the US). It was so weird moving there from London.

Definitely pass your test as soon as you can, providing you don't drive like a dick you should keep you license for life. My best friend passed his test when he was 30, he has not driven since as shortly after he moved to a country where driving is consider a danger sport even for experienced drivers. He does not regret doing it though as now he has the licence, when he is in a position to drive again he'll take a course of refresher lessons first.

Driving gives you freedom even when you don't own a car. In a car free period of my life we needed to go cross country at short notice , because we couldn't book in advance the train tickets were nearly £300 per person, instead I booked a little 1 litre for £55 for two days and spent £60 on petrol. Having my licence saved us £485.

I have a driving licence but have never driven since I passed 20 years ago. I don't enjoy driving. I lack confidence in traffic. I'm terrified of hitting someone/crashing or not being able to pull out on roundabouts. I live somewhere where you can get to most places without a car and I've got used to it.

The only times I regret it is when I have to rely on DH so we can take the DC on days out. For me alone I'd be happy to get to places by public transport.

I can drive (as in I've got a license) but I don't.

I accepted 3 years after passing my test (passed 5th time) that I am just not cut out to be a driver.

I was a danger to myself and everyone else on the road...despite being married to a Driving Instructor at the time!

Even advanced lessons didn't help me. When I looked in the wing mirrors for example, I still had no idea how near/far other cars or even the kerb was. It's as though it just wouldn't 'compute' in my brain.

It hasn't held me back because I live in London and the transport is brilliant here...and I would never choose to live anywhere that I could only access by car. What happens if you are no longer able to drive for some reason?

It also worries me that there must be drivers who feel the same as me, but they're forced to drive (badly) because their job or location requires it.

Wow! X posted with Dysfunctional

I am feeling shitty about being a failed breastfeeder today usual. Threads all over the place about that.

That's odd MrsK. DB doesn't live a million miles away I will ask him. He is quite a car fanatic actually, now you mention it.

I just can't pass a test. I don't believe it's my fault as such but I feel like a real idiot. I'm also the first in my family to fail a driving test. I think they all took it for granted that I would pass and were as disappointed as me when that was not the case. I'd like to do it, I'd feel like a proper grown up and not be reliant on DH or public transport. It would also open up more options as to where we live and for the DCs' education. So, I'm considering trying again. My theory has expired, though I find that easy so am not too worried about that part. It's the practical that I am dreading because it is so expensive and I just feel like I'm wasting money on failure after failure. I would like DS1 to learn if he can, he will be 17 next year. I wish I'd had the opportunity when I was that age but my folks couldn't afford it.

I agree Worra. i've always thought about my not driving as my gift to humanity. But now i am forced back learning again :( . I pledge to you all that if i pass i will just do local, slow, necessary journeys

[snorts at the idea of an Aldi adventure]

Honestly, the idea of living somewhere where you need your car to even pick up a pint of milk is my idea of hell. I don't like the idea of having to drive the children to school either. I'd much rather they could walk. I guess that's why I loved London so much.

Even here in the US, now we own a car that DH drives regularly and plan to drive soon, we still chose our house based on the on-foot accessibility of amenities like shops and schools.

I plan to drive soon, that should be!

They also drive very very fast. 70mph dual carriageways link up everywhere and you are expected to drive at the speed limit unless there is some really drastic reason not to. People take the many roundabouts without slowing. When i was learning there i was told i would fail for not driving at 70 as i was 'failing to progress'. I found it totally terrifying. Cars would be right up your arse, overtaking dangerously, swearing at you. Even in the snow. utter madness.