to not want my 3yo to go to a petting farm without me

[pianointhedark]

DD is 3.2. Her preschool are doing a trip to a petting farm, which I feel reluctant to let her go on.

My main concern is hygiene. With the best will in the world the staff cannot be watching all the children all the time, and obviously it would only take a moment for her hand to go into her mouth before it had been washed. Obviously I could impress upon her not to do that, but she's only 3 and I can't expect her to understand why or remember.

I did ask whether they needed any parent helpers, but the answer was no. I then told a little white lie - that DD can be wary of animals and for that reason I would prefer to be with her, but again the answer was no - apparently they can't allow one parent to go because then all will want to go and they're sure DD will be fine.

AIBU to not want her to go? Sometimes I worry that I am being overly PFB and would appreciate some MN perspective.

How do you think small children who live on actual , real farms survive?

I grew up with cats, sheep, hens, ducks, goats, horses, chickens and would have been in contact with them from a very early age. I defintely didn't run to wash my hands every time I touched an animal.

I would let my child go.

Then I would ask a friend/relative whose answer I would trust, whether they had noticed me becoming anxious lately. Also, I'd try to learn some yoga and relaxing breathing techniques and keep a diary for four weeks of any incident or time when I felt uncomfortably anxious. If trusted friend upon further consultation, armed with diary evidence, thought I was being abnormally anxious, I'd speak to a health professional about it, again with the diary for evidence.

Phaedra, that's a bit like saying that you've flown hundreds of times but never died in a plane crash and therefore nobody is unsafe flying. We're not denying that the risk is low, but those who claim it is non existent or that a farm child has never had E Coli are deluding themselves.

Ecolium so what are you suggesting? don't fly?don't pet an animal? Be perpetually worried?

I think some posters are being rather rude to ecolimum given her child contracted ecoli from a petting farm AND she still lets her kids attend them.

There is a more obvious solution OP which is to let your child attend on the proviso she doesn't touch the animals. With the correct staff ratios, that would be relatively easy to manage. You could even just say she is allergic to animal fur.

Come to think of it, I think I've subconsciously not let my kids touch the sheep/goats when we have visited before. I probably sound nuts but we go to these places quite a lot and actually touching the animals is a small part of it.

I used to take older school kids trekking and did risk assessments etc. one risk is also from animal excrement as you walk through farmland. This isn't the sane ecoli when we were kids - it's apparently more virulent now or widespread, I can't remember.

But it meant that these kids couldn't wear their hiking boots in the tent etc...

We have a big nursery trip coming up to a farm and my toddler is a thumb sucker.

just don't send her op, don't t understand the issue.

At the one up the road from my house that we have annual membership for the dds have caught some nasty bugs over the years. That was from the attached 'soft plague' centre rather than the animals though, yuck.

tbh though I don't let my 2.4 year old touch the animals generally.

Phaedra, where did I say that?

All I'm saying is that it's stupid to deny the risks, but that they are tiny. You'll note that I still took my children to farms even after the unthinkable happened to me.

The report linked about ten posts upthread is quite interesting reading.

In the farm in question (at the time of the serious outbreak) they picked up swabs of ecoli from areas such as floors and loos. So if the separation between animal areas and other areas is not correct then contamination is possible.

The report recommends 'look and see' areas being clearly demarcated from petting areas.

I have visited that farm since and would say that is what they have now, but they must have gone through a big overhaul to get there.

Sorry, but I think you are overreacting.

When I was four years old I wanderd off into the barn,
came across one of our pigs that unexpectedly was about to give birth,
and started to help her deliver her babies.
My father told me bout the shock he had when he found me.
I´m not sure about the hand- and -mouth-thing happened in that scenario, but I did not become ill as a consequence.

I was always a healthy child.

A bit older I also used to camp among the sheep at night.
Again, healthy.
Your daughter will be fine!
Remember that farms like that will always be organized,
cleaned and tidy.
All kind of toxic things is always put away safely.
What if you go together with her before she goes with nursery, so you can see the place your self to be assured?

And I am sure they all will wash their hands before they eat!

Missmess, because you were ok that means that other people are making up the risks? Nobody is saying that millions of kids haven't been perfectly fine after exposure to farm animals but it DOES happen so why claim that based on your anecdotal evidence that nothing will happen. The likelihood and risk is very low but don't just dismiss some real evidence because it didn't happen to you

Crumbs, just read that report on e coli and petting farms - the timeline feature for Godstone Farm is shocking. Despite numerous cases of E Coli occurring over a period of several weeks, the farm wasn't closed until a paediatrician rang for the second time to 'express frustration' that nothing had been done to close the farm. This, despite twelve children being in hospital and with a further 24 children being treated for the disease in their own homes.

I presume it wasn't done earlier because somebody stood to lose a lot of money.

If those responsible for minimising the risk of infection are behaving with such incompetence, I can completely understand a parent not wishing to offer their child up to circumstances.

This risk thing is what's making the thread go round and round in circles.

No-one is saying there's no risk at all. Just that risk analysis,which we all do several times a day, probably without even thinking, is what is important.

For most people, if the risk is extremely low, they will decide on balance to ignore it. For others, the fact that the risk is extremely low is irrelevant - they will react the same as if it was high. So I think we all know the OP won't let her DD go on the preschool trip because the risk, though miniscule, exists.

Bloody hell,I had no idea about Godstone farm, I've done many a school trip there many moons before the e coli out break

There's also an element of the thought of this particular problem - the HUS from E. coli in particular - being so horrible that people want to reduce the risk of getting it from petting farms to as close to zero as possible. So in a way it's irrelevant whether the starting risk is 5% or 0.05% - if what you want is zero, you do what's necessary to get down to that, regardless of your starting point.

Obviously it's impossible to get the risk of E. coli down to zero for your whole life in general! There'd be a huge cost in limiting life experiences (no eating out, for instance). But petting farms are easy to skip, even just till your child is older, without it being a terrible loss to a child.

I'm honestly a bit baffled as to why this is such a huge deal. The existence of all the handwashing advice, farms having to be closed, special reports and so on surely tells us that whatever else this is, it's not a nobrainer that you always say yes to trips like this. Even if only a minority of people choose not to go they're hardly being off-the-scale unreasonable to the extent of needing to see their GP for advice on their mental health!

Thank you silver. I don't think I need to see a GP either.

I'm still struggling to work out why the OP started this thread at all if she never had any intention of allowing her DD to go on this trip and felt all the available evidence backed up her decision