To have said no?

[Tiggywinklespinny]

We have just had dinner, chicken veggies and baby new potatoes.

Dsd (10) can barely use a knife and was asked to cut her chicken not eat it off the fork in a great lump. Instead she said she didn't want it and left it. Too full she said.

She's now on meltdown because I've said no to ice-cream. AIBU??

My 6 year old can use a knife. He tries to get us to do it too but we refuse unless it's something hard /difficult to cut when we help. And he would have got exactly the response you gave her in the same situation so yanbu.

I'm frankly appalled at patents who think it's preferable to let their children eat this type of food with their fingers. What kind of life lesson is that then? They'll get ridiculed by their friends and thought of as rude by their peers as they grow up. Nice one. Not.

Too full for chicken = Too full for dessert. Doesn't matter how she eats it. At 10, she knows how to use a knife (unless you're from the US).

YANBU

Oo, slamming doors? Warn her if she does it again, you'll take it off and then everyone can go in her room if they want. My daughters both lost their doors. Only happened once! Our sons loved it . Strangely,,their doors never slammed or had to be taken off.

An NT 10 year old does not have to be shown how to use a knife! I bet she can work out how to use phones etc with no problem at all. She's just being a brat. I don't blame you for not wanting to sit at the table with someone eating like that.
YANBU - she has to learn there are rules at your house and using cutlery properly is one of them. Anyway, it's a basic life skill.
Too right she doesn't get any pudding!

Oh boy - just read the update!
She's done it this time...
Keep us posted please!

I would assume you have shown her lots of times, and so I think yes, you are totally justified.

I send you a cyber g&t.

Katie A little uncalled for calling the OP's 10 year old child a "brat" don't you think? Keep us posted please! What are you after?

She just being a bloody brat. Too lazy at age 10 to use cutlery, and then shouting and slamming doors. Very bad behaviour.

I don't think she's being a brat. I think she's being a child.

She's sent her mum a message from her iPad..her mum has phoned, dh has told her her behaviour is unacceptable and there will be no I've cream at all tonight. Dh is now placating dsd as he can't bear to see her upset..I've got more gin and will let them get on with it!

A little uncalled for calling the OP's 10 year old child a "brat" don't you think?

I don't, I think a 'brat' is exactly what she's being.

Drink the gin while eating all the ice cream, Tiggy!

buzzard - I'm hoping for an update of course. On how OP deals with this brat. Because she is a brat. Is that clear enough for you?

And she's not the OPs child - she is her DSD.

OP - thank you for the update. I'm glad DH stuck to his guns re the appalling behaviour. At 10 she is too old to behave like a toddler having a temper tantrum and slamming doors. Enjoy the gin and ice cream - you deserve them.

How can you possibly come on here and judge someone else's child without having one clue what's going on in her life? Bad behaviour, yes. But to call her a brat is to behave in exactly the way you're criticizing her for.

OP - no doubt it sounds like a nightmare though, hope you're managing to enjoy some much needed gin!

And KatieKaye Interesting that you say she's too old for temper tantrums. Surely you're too old for name calling.

Erm, but displaying bad behaviour IS being a brat!!!! I think you're overloading the word with a bit too much meaning if you are finding it that offensive.

If she's like this at 10, God help you in a few years time.

YANBU!

There's quite a difference between saying someone is behaving like a brat and saying they are one.

You might think "There's quite a difference between saying someone is behaving like a brat and saying they are one" ican. But a lot of other people here disagree with you and think she is a brat. So stop being so dogmatic.

Are you the brat's DM by any chance?

Do you call your children names when they misbehave?

I love dsd very much there's no issue with her, however she is tonight behaving like a brat. She's tired, she didn't get her own way and she's mightily pissed off that dh and I cannot be divided.

Tiggy well done for standing your ground. What's her DM like? Is she generally supportive?

I don't understand the logic of saying that if she can't eat the chicken then she's too full up for ice cream.

Surely if she ate the chicken she'd be more full up and therefore have less room for the ice cream?
being a savage.

Her mum I'm sure does her best but finds dsd very difficult to handle. She's more interested in her new boyfriend and her nights out than her daughter. Could be partly why she's kicked off so dramatically. I can't wait until she's a teen not

ignore the being a savage bit, I was going to tell you a story about my DS being a savage at the dinner table but then couldn't be bothered.