to start escorting?

[Rocknahardplace]

I don't know what else to do :(

Lost my job instead of being made full time as expected. Savings are gone after being part time for almost a year, can survive at most another month's rent.

I live in shared accom with two flatmates, have no partner, no family who can help me. I have a life limiting condition which rules out a few things like bar work (cannot stand for long times due to nerve damage) but refused dla/pip. It;s just me on my own and I'm sinking. At least if I escort and bank a few hundred pounds it might keep a roof over my head and a bit of food on the table for longer.

So upset and heartbroken my life has turned out like this but I don't know what to do. Escorting so I don't lose my home, a permanent address from which to keep applying to jobs seems like the only option. I wouldn't survive in a hostel and would probably have all my things stolen.

You're in London. There are plenty of jobs you can do to tide you over - don't think of being an escort for god's sake! They might not be what you want and you might have to have 3 jobs for a while, even minimum wage but I'm sure you can pick up McDonald's, waitressing, cleaning, dog walking, temping. You sound a vulnerable person why damage that further by doing something that would ultimately be soul-destroying? I'm sure your flat mates would help you out with food for a bit too plus you should be entitled to housing benefit, council tax benefit and JSA. There are other options out there.

OP, I won't address the issue of escorting as you have had some great advice. You do sound very vulnerable though and I think for that reason, please treat yourself kindly.

I completely believe people can fall through the net in this day and age. It is very easy to not fit into any of the criteria for help (e.g. disability) but be too ill to work f/t or in certain jobs. I have a relative like this and he also experiences so much anxiety about money and this does not help MH problems at all.

One solution you may not have thought of, which definitely would bring in a bit of extra money if not the whole amount you need is tutoring- if you have two degrees, register with every tutoring agency going, call them and see if you can take classes. Usually they prefer it if you go to the clients, but be careful you don't spend much money on travel (or get a travelcard in London so there is a limit on this). You can offer a range of subjects, not just your degree ones, but anything you took at A-level.

You won't get £50 a time (!), but you might get £25-30 an hour with a small cut for the agency and people sometimes do 1.30 or 2 hour sessions. You could set up on your own but this requires advertising- unless you know people at a local school/access to parents.

If you are well-educated this can be a good solution, however I think it is not possible to earn a long-term full wage doing this unless you really do it as a full-time job (so two or three clients every day). You may then be able to get the benefit where you get a minimum amount of money and are assumed to be working more than 16 or 21 hours a week- my relative does this and he often doesn't work that much (due to illness) but gets housing benefit and just enough money to get by food-wise.

One thing you might need to think flexibly about, and I hear you don't want to, is housing costs if you can't get full housing benefit for that rental. There ARE cheaper rooms in London in shared houses, and that is one very obvious way to shave a reasonable amount off your living costs. A live-in position, doing some care work (limited perhaps by your back) is another.

Good luck, now you have calmed down, I think you have more options than you think.

Please do not listen to exvicegirl, it is not safe. Even "high class" escorts do get beaten up and raped. Think of it logically, how can anyone make sure the men you meet are "safe". A man may be well known by the agency and never attacked one of the women. He then has a shitty week and books you. You say you don't do anal, and he gets angry and takes it out on you.

Just think logically. Would you meet a number of men in a night that have been screened by a dating agency, and go straight back to their flats alone? No you wouldn't. And any dating agency would say that even if they had screened them, you need to meet in a public place and get to know them first.

I am glad if someone does this and is never attacked or beaten up. But that is an unusual experience.

If you are prostituted in London, you are 12 times more likely to be murdered than other women. And remember most women are not murdered by men they "work" with, but by male partners or exes.

Stripper? Surely this is best of a bad bunch? You can sit I between dances. I auditioned once and felt totally violated and mortified... I also applied for a masseuse position - which took to me a fucking whore house. Again, I was horrified and felt violated. I do not judge you for considering these things, but it will inevitably fuck you up if you are doing it out of pure necessity (which most will)

I am so sorry for you and your position , but I ask you to please reconsider this line of work. No amount of cash is worth the loss of self respect and the self hate you will endure. Plus the risk of rape / murder...

Also OP - go for a walk, now every man you walk past imagine them in top of you grunting away, imagine you having to kiss them etc..
It is all very well saying you wont do anal or kiss them , but you are going to have a lot of competition and I doubt you would get far without doing the dirtiest of deeds.
This is a sure fire way to make you realise just how degraded you would feel...

Op, you've had some good advice. I was going to suggest putting yourself on the books of one of the agencies that place people for a minimal rent in unoccupied buildings (like Camelot), to save on living costs, but that won't work if you definitely want to continue to live in your current houseshare.

Quite apart from the considerable potential dangers - physical and mental - of becoming a prostitute, wouldn't escorting involve considerable outlay on grooming, clothes, underwear etc?

Check out saafe (that is the correct spelling) to ensure you stay safe if you do decide to do this

Gosh, Annie, a lot of people do two degrees without it being a magic path to immediate lucrative employment - some graduate positions are still terribly difficult to get, even with the requisite qualifications, especially if you haven't managed to get highly-competitive (and unpaid)internships etc on the way along. The OP is confident she can get another job in her field if she can manage to support herself for a few months while she searches.

I had an MA in my field and was working as a chambermaid and in a bookshop at one point, after which I got injured in an accident, and couldn't work for six months while I learned to walk again. It's not hard to be penniless and highly-qualified.

Don't do it. If you hated one night as a stripper.
Housing benefit. ESA. these don't have to be long term. Just keep you going whilst you find another job.

So you don't make plans when you're part time, maybe pick up another job then to keep the money coming in? You just wait until you're completely on your uppers then you think of a solution and that solution is becoming a prostitute - when you have 2 degrees, so implicitly you've got to be a reasonably intelligent, functioning human being? No, sorry, doesn't add up. I know people slip through the nets but usually not people that have managed their lives enough to complete 2 degrees. People have made loads of suggestions - data entry, typing etc, admin/office skills that people with 2 degrees usually have yet that never crossed her mind?

Be aware as well, if you do this, and then get a job in your field, you may come into contact with men you have been paid by. I know women who have had to move town when or workplace once a man tells everyone about a woman's past i.e. taht she was prostituted.

It is not right, but there is not a great deal of stigma to being a punter. There is a lot of stigma to having been prostituted. Doing something like this for a few months could come back and haunt you.

This sounds very much like it is for an article or summat

Did you "speak" to them after you they pretended to like fucking you for money, sweetalphamale

AnyFucker
What a crass comment.

I'm not a punter, I'm a friend.

sweetalphamale - what circles do you live in that you mix with escorts? and can speak for the majority of escorts, saying they enjoy it? How simplistic to say they must enjoy doing it otherwise they wouldn't do it. I think you're either a bit thick naive or yanking our chain.

heh heh

Brilliant.