to start escorting?

[Rocknahardplace]

I don't know what else to do :(

Lost my job instead of being made full time as expected. Savings are gone after being part time for almost a year, can survive at most another month's rent.

I live in shared accom with two flatmates, have no partner, no family who can help me. I have a life limiting condition which rules out a few things like bar work (cannot stand for long times due to nerve damage) but refused dla/pip. It;s just me on my own and I'm sinking. At least if I escort and bank a few hundred pounds it might keep a roof over my head and a bit of food on the table for longer.

So upset and heartbroken my life has turned out like this but I don't know what to do. Escorting so I don't lose my home, a permanent address from which to keep applying to jobs seems like the only option. I wouldn't survive in a hostel and would probably have all my things stolen.

And if you wouldn't survive in a hostel, there is no way you would survive escorting.

Thanks everyone for talking to me, the tears are pouring down my face here and I literally have no one else I can admit this too. Thank you so much.

Yanbu to do what you want with your body - but if you're feeling low, and hated one night of stripping, I would imagine that escorting will make you feel even worse.

The sex industry is not generally a good thing for women, or the women working in it. Especially if they're feeling desperate.

Just think about how it will affect you mentally in the long term.

The sex industry is not physically very safe, either.

I have a friend who works in a call centre. She has back problems and can't stand for long periods either. So this job suited her. And there are telesales jobs which are not fun, but as a temporary measure they might help you.

In the throws of desperation, it might seem like your only option but it isn't.
Also it doesn't seem that you would be making an informed decision as to what you would be taking on. Have you talked to escorts about what it is actually like? what would be expected of you?
Please look into the ideas mentioned upthread. Can you cut your outgoings? I don't know how your health is but could you clean, or do ironing/gardening or such small jobs to tide you over? If you feel that sex work is the only option could you work on the phone or webcam?

OP, there are call centre jobs which don't necessarily rely on telesales too _ I had a couple in my post-grad days, and whilst they are slightly soul-destroying, they are nothing like as soul-destroying as the sex industry.

Hope you're ok. Good luck.

Shame on the person who was sneary and unpleasant to the OP; severely lacking in compassion.

OP I'm sorry to hear that you are in this situation. It must feel awful. Please keep searching and asking for ideas that might help....already on here you have the call centre idea, that's one thing to look into. Don't give up hope. Wishing you all the best.

Try for the call centre work and you could go to CAB and find out if you're entitled to any more money. Steer clear od escort work it's very demeaning and dangerous. Web cam work is easier and telesex is money for nothing. Please stay away from escorts. My friend did this and was severely beaten up by a client.

Do take care and Good Luck with everything

£125 a week for a room in a shared house? For real?

I would suggest the first thing you do is look into moving......

Re your escort idea, do you actually have any idea how you would get into it? I assume you won't just be going out to stand on street corners! A good friend of mine used to work as a maid in a London house and some of the stories she would tell us were terrifying. With the advent of the internet it's actually a lot harder as there are a LOT of desperate women out there advertising themselves as do-anything. How far would you go for a punter? Do you have any contacts in the industry already? How are your looks? Your figure? How old are you? You're going to be lined up and compared to others, who these days are often young and pretty eastern europeans, will you make the grade?

I think you need to do a bit more research, talk to some working girls etc before just blithely deciding you are going to be an escort, you sound a bit naive about how it works.

Yambabe, I live in London, hence the rent. Tied into a contract, anyway it's unlikely I would get much cheaper. There are qualities about my home which are hugely important, such as having a harmonious relationship with my flatmates, and having a great relationship with my landlord. It's my home and it;s extremely disressing to think of being forced to leave when I have nowhere else to go. I have worked so fucking hard to set myself up and build a little base for myself, from absolutely nothing, and I am terrified of losing it.

My looks are good and I'm in my twenties. Frequently get ID'd (in the days when I could actually afford to buy alcohol) so not worried about that.

I don't think I'm naive about what I'd be expected to do, ie plenty of squalid dull sex that gets a bit rough as punters try to emulate what they see in porn, having to be a show pony who also makes the man feel special and like he's a good lover. Completely objectified for the money, a receptacle. I get that. I am probably naive when it comes to how anyone starts out with an agency (I wasn't considering walking the streets) and naive in my belief that agencies could offer some protection in screening clients etc.

I don't think I can hack it, and have managed to calm down my insane financial terror, and will start trying to go down other routes tomorrow.

Move out of London, there are many more opportunities and cheaper rents in other parts of the country.

Also, it does piss me off when people say stuff like "oh you need to move". Even if there was a great deal on a houseshare somewhere else, moving actually costs money. I would not pass the reference checks now as I don't HAVE a job. Nor do I have a deposit to put down to secure anywhere else, and it can take time to get the deposit back from my current place. So i can't just fucking move!

When you are on the bones of your arse it is very, very difficult to make plans even if they are more financially sound in the long run. I think people on a proper salary that allows them to be comfortable often forget what it;s like when a tenner has grave implications for how the rest of your month will be, let alone a few hundred here or there to move house.

To give an example, I was on the way to a job interview and my train broke down. It was the second interview with the company and I was meeting the MD so crucially important to make a good impression, so I got a cab, risking £20 as they seemed to really like me and it seemed like a risk I couldn't afford not to take.

Well, I didn't get the job, and spending that £20 quite literally meant basically living on toast and jam or cheese for a week, and joking with my flatmates that I was just too incredibly lazy to cook. But I could not afford to eat adequately.

Nomorequotes, where are all these other opportunities in the rest of the country?? Not for my industry or anything vaguely related, that's for sure. They are all in London.

Okay but staying in London in the long-term will not help you find work. Have you thought about going to uni somewhere? Or training up as something? You get quite good bursaries and support and you can really use being on the bones of your arse to improve your situation long-term

What industry are you looking for work in? If its specialised you might get a relocation package and support?

I have two degrees, Nomorequotes. I have trained for a long time and fought my way into my field in an entry level position that will hopefully open doors but have now been let go from through no fault of my own (my cv and references are excellent and I'm getting interviews) if I can only survive long enough in the day to day for the next few months.

What do you mean staying in London long term will not help me find work?

Well its just such a cut-throat place and rents and cost of living are so high. If you can find a job outside of London it would be so much more economical to move.

Well it appears the only option is to sell yourself.

Every different option you have been offered has resulted in you saying 'nope not an option' so selling yourself must be, yes?

OP so many many people are where you are if not worse but they do not see the only option is to sell themselves.
You have options whether you choose to take them is down to you but for fuck sake do not try to justify your choice to sell yourself as a means to keep a roof above your head. I would rather live in a shelter than do that. Use the education you have and keep repeating to put yourself in a better position. Even if that means moving.

Life choices are just that, choices. You need to change your ideals and start making choices.

sorry, I didn't mean to be a bit judgy about your home. It's been 30 years since I lived in London, it's just that what you are paying monthly in rent for a room in a shared house is twice what the mortgage on my 3-bed semi is here in the north!

I totally get what you are saying about it being your home though, and I really do feel for you.

But from hearing about my friend's experience in the "escort" industry and the way you come across here I really don't think you'd be tough enough to hack it.

You mentioned that you have stripped before, have you maybe considered dancing as an alternative?

Funnyfoot you clearly havent read the thread - your accusation makes no sense. I said quite distinctly that I have calmed down a little and was going to investigate some of the ideas on this thread.

And please, spare me your pious bullshit about how we can all make fully unfettered choices with circumstances and past history and health and a million other factors not playing any part in the choices we are forced to consider.

No, I probably won't become an escort at this point in my life. But I am enraged that I'm forced to consider it despite a good education and good experience in the world of employment.

It's flippant of you to tell me to just change my ideals and go live in a hostel and lose everything I've worked for to date.

Its a shame that someone so well educated feels they have to resort to escorting. Do you think that maybe you are in an area of such low employment and your education is preventing you from taking lesser jobs than you think you are worth? Escorting is definitely a low job though, even if it is better paid than others mentioned.

Your body is worth more than you are giving it credit for right now.

And Funnyfoot - where did I "keep repeating" about my education? Get away to fuck.

On the off chance this is real, what about camming? Basically solo porn via webcam that you get paid for. Beats having sex with people who will hurt you but downside is once something is on the internet, it's there forever. You wouldn't have to stand for long either. But it still involves selling yourself and proactive selling at that.

Yambabe, thanks, no I didn't think you were judging! Was just explaining the situation I'm in, as I know people outside London are often incredulous at the rents here.