To ask those of you who are pro life?

[Anonynony]

How do you feel about friends who have had abortions? Can you maintain friendships with people who have had an abortion and no regrets?

One of my friends has stunned me, talking about another friend of ours who had considered an abortion and my friend said I'm so glad she didn't because I wouldn't have been able to stay friends with her
I'm really surprised, I'm extremely pro choice and vocal about it but this doesn't bother my friend.
But what my friend doesn't know is that I also had an abortion and although I have no regrets I feel a bit strange around my friend now?

the body , the 'one or two' women (there are more than that) who regret abortion are not my reasons for objecting to it. I have been pointing out that they do exist because you have been dismissive of them by saying that women who seek abortions do not want the baby and do not want to give birth. That is not always the case.

gordy, being turned down for adoption because the man had a vasectomy in a previous relationship seems wrong if they would otherwise have been able to offer the baby a good home. Don't you agree?

I'm struggling to see why some many people have difficulties with basic English comprehension. My 8 yo would have no difficulty working this out. I suppose it involves some basic math too - perhaps that's the problem? Is 12 less than the current age of viability i.e.. 24?

I've answered it, just not the way you wanted me to.

I would not agree with induction prior to the age of viability where the aim is clearly to terminate the foetus' life

Would you have sanctioned an abortion in Baby's circumstances at 12 weeks? The answers are "yes" or "no".

I did not consider the early induction of my friend with pre-eclampsia abortion. (both mother and baby survived)

I had severe pre-eclampsia with DD. I was taken into hospital at 22 weeks and remained there until her early induction at 35 weeks. I was moved to Intensive Care twice, was on a permanent potassium drip for the full 13/14 weeks, had one brain bleed and despite ridiculous water retention (that meant I went from wearing size 12 pyjamas to size 20 pyjamas) managed to lose 2 stone before the end of my pregnancy. The pregnancy has left me with recurring problems that have affected the rest of my life, my health, my career and the wellbeing of my family.

I was also all alone through my awful pregnancy and that played hell with my mental health.

When DD was born I had 2 hours with her until the hospital was satisfied I wasn't going to die, then she was taken to Intensive Care where she stayed for 4 weeks. Whilst being 35 weeks, she was the size and development of 30 weeks and it was touch and go for her as well as me. DH was home by then, but could not cope with seeing his wife and child so ill. It played hell with our marriage and our life together - how we have remained together is beyond me tbh.

Whilst I was going through all this, all I wanted was my baby. However, as time has passed I have realised that were I to become pregnant again I would abort. DD was a 'happy' accident, (whilst I was taking the piss up thread, it is actually the truth) but if I had another 'accident' there is no way I could go through another pregnancy and risk DD being motherless for the sake of an unborn child.

My 'rights' as a human being and as a mother to stay alive for my DD and DH,
DD's 'rights' as a child to have a living mother,
DH's 'rights' to have a wife and happy only child

Far outweigh the 'rights' of an unborn foetus, a non-sentient being, that will never have any idea that it ever existed. The pain that DD and DH would go through if I were to die is far more important and relevant. I would not force my living, breathing child to be hurt for anything. Her needs come first.

Bumbley, what are your staunch beliefs based on? Educate me, please. Can I be selfish and ask you specifically about the situation where the foetus will not survive outside the womb? Why do you think the way you do?

I've answered it, just not the way you wanted me to

No, no, you haven't answered it at all. You've included the word "induction" when it's not clear how that might apply to a procedure happening at 12 weeks. You've included the word "viability" when it's not clear how that can be applied to the development of the fetus.

I would not agree with induction prior to the age of viability where the aim is clearly to terminate the foetus' life

Would you have sanctioned an abortion in Baby's circumstances at 12 weeks? The answers are "yes" or "no".

bumbly you are sneering and making jokes at someone's real life pain.

I expected nothing less from you.

You can't answer yes or no so I will answer for you.

you disagree with abortion for any reason whatsoever and under any circumstances

Baby should have been denied her early termination and must just live with it!

The narcissism on display here is actually quite disturbing.

babyfacedAssasin, I did your question. You know what the current age of viability is and I said that I did not support it under that age. I addressed your situation specifically. That is facing the reality of it and I have given my answer. I do not have a problem with doing that.

I did answer*

in baby's case would you have sanctioned a termination knowing all her circumstances, yes or no

Any other answer than yes, a resounding yes, is inhumane fgs!

You know what the current age of viability is and I said that I did not support it under that age

What is the age of viability for the fetus Baby is carrying?

Oh and after my brain bleed (I think I was about 26/27 weeks) the hospital actually asked me if I wanted to continue with the pregnancy. I said I did. I was then asked to sign a form that basically said were I to have another bleed, the hospital would do all they could to save ME, even if that meant delivering the baby that would not survive. Their policy was to keep ME alive even if it meant sacrificing DD. The opposite to what poor Savita went though .

LtEveDallas brave post.

I had a amino with dd4 as I had indications that she could be severely disabled.

I would have aborted that pregnancy in a heart best to protect the lives and future security of my 3 older children.

Personally I feel for me it's morally wrong to bring a severely disabled child into the world but thats my personal choice and not to make for other people

Thankfully she was fine.

See my choice, my body. Not legislating for anyone else here.

BabyFacedAssasin, I would actually like to answer your questions and try to explain why I feel the way I do but right now, any reply I give is going to be torn apart, mocked and ridiculed. I don't particularly feel like exposing myself to more of that right now. Maybe another time as part of a more civilised discussion.

Maid Of Stars,

Is a 12 week old foetus considered viable outside the mother? You have your answer.

LtEve, the policy is always to preserve the life of the mother, even if it risks the life of the foetus - even in Ireland.

Apologies baby

bumbly baby's child is alive now but won't survive when born.

Would you think it's cruel to keep baby waiting to term to deliver or terminate early so save her distress.

Can you answer the question as you haven't answered her specific circumstance.

gordy, being turned down for adoption because the man had a vasectomy in a previous relationship seems wrong if they would otherwise have been able to offer the baby a good home. Don't you agree

well on paper yes but I don't have the full social services report (which is lengthy and goes into much detail) - I doubt that alone is the reason

maybe just wanting 'a baby' was also an issue - and maybe, having had a vasectomy and made a decision not to have any more children, when interviewed alone, the man in question was not 100% committed

I don't know - neither do you - you have a habit of throwing around half truths when it suits you

I'd rather SS turned people down than acted as baby brokers for people wanting perfect aryan babies take from women forced to give birth to them

Is a 12 week old foetus considered viable outside the mother? You have your answer

No, no I don't. Can you tell me how you can possibly apply terms like average "viability", even to use them to guide your decision-making (not that you've been brave enough to vocalise your "decision"), to a situation like Baby's?

You know what the current age of viability is and I said that I did not support it under that age

What is the age of viability for the fetus Baby is carrying?

bumbly the discussion is civilised.

Answer the question.

the body, did you miss my earlier post about induction? It was addressed specifically to her circumstances.

gordy I think I hear 1955 Ireland knocking at the door!

LtEve, the policy is always to preserve the life of the mother, even if it risks the life of the foetus - even in Ireland

Why did Savita die then? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Savita_Halappanavar

The narcissism on display here is actually quite disturbing.
I have said this, in a roundabout way a number of times, both on this thread and the last. Apparently that makes me a bully. Well, that and I expect answers to questions posited by both me and others.

LtEve, the policy is always to preserve the life of the mother, even if it risks the life of the foetus - even in Ireland.
Wrong.