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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask those of you who are pro life?

999 replies

Anonynony · 21/04/2014 14:49

How do you feel about friends who have had abortions? Can you maintain friendships with people who have had an abortion and no regrets?

One of my friends has stunned me, talking about another friend of ours who had considered an abortion and my friend said I'm so glad she didn't because I wouldn't have been able to stay friends with her Shock
I'm really surprised, I'm extremely pro choice and vocal about it but this doesn't bother my friend.
But what my friend doesn't know is that I also had an abortion and although I have no regrets I feel a bit strange around my friend now?

OP posts:
Dawndonnaagain · 21/04/2014 23:55

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

22honey · 21/04/2014 23:55

5madthings I dont think anyone has said they are against abortions full stop and would judge 100% of people who had one. If they did, I missed it.

22honey · 21/04/2014 23:56

Wow Dawn, no need for so many personal insults! People are allowed to air their opinions when a thread asks about it.

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 21/04/2014 23:57

It's not helpful to compare an abortion to 'killing a baby'. I had one very recently and although it was a heartbreaking decision I didn't consider that I was murdering anyone and believe me, I googled :(

5madthings · 21/04/2014 23:58

22honey bumbley is always on these threads and yrs she is against abortion and is pro life from conception. As I Saud she is like a dog with a bone on this issue, hence why many posters have refused to engage with her on this issue.

Dawndonnaagain · 21/04/2014 23:59

22 Yes. I asked for empathy for somebody. You and your cronies ignored it. Nice.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:00

I've hardly posted on this thread at all in comparison to other people. Thankfully there are more people who share similar views to me so there has been a much better spread of comments rather than one person trying to respond to attacks from 10 different posters by themselves!

You may disagree with my opinion but I do not try to bully people or shut down discussions and I don't tend to resort to swearing and insults either. The same can not be said of some contributors to this thread and others. Maybe you don't notice because it's not directed at you and/or you think it is acceptable if you don't agree with someone.

22honey · 22/04/2014 00:01

I'm sorry for your experience xx But yes I would consider a late term abortion where the fetus could live 'killing a baby' (bit crude way of putting it though) and the law in the UK seems to agree as its illegal after 24 weeks except for medical reasons.

22honey · 22/04/2014 00:03

Dawn, I posted my sympathy and condolences to Baby further up. I was not aware she had asked herself for the thread to end. We were/are having a legitimate discussion, theres no need to bring a lot of emotion into everything, unless you yourself are in Baby's position.

Dawndonnaagain · 22/04/2014 00:04

I'm sure baby really appreciates that 22.

Dawndonnaagain · 22/04/2014 00:05
22honey · 22/04/2014 00:06

But Vamp I will add for the last time for others who twist words sake that doesnt mean I dont believe a woman should have the choice! They should, but people will always judge certain choices and that has to be accepted.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:07

Actually Dawn, I'll let that one stand. It proves my point about you being a bully and resorting to personal insults. No one else on this thread has done that. Well done for dragging the tone down.

The person that you are demanding empathy for has said herself that she doesn't want people to censor their opinions on her behalf or shut down discussions.

5madthings, I'm not pro-life from conception but other people on this thread are. Why not have a go at them for their horrific misogynistic opinions?

22honey · 22/04/2014 00:08

Dawn, I have nothing but sympathy for anyone who needs a termination for medical reasons, they should be able to do it at whatever stage. Its not the same at all as someone aborting a healthy baby because they wont be able to afford an extra holiday every year with another child!

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:09

22, babyfaced did not request for the thread to end. She specifically said that she did not want people to censor their opinions. Dawn has her own agenda.

5madthings · 22/04/2014 00:11

I already said I don't respect anyone who doesn't believers woman should have bodily autonomy And wouldn't be friends with them.

You know full well you are always on these threads bumbley, or would you like me to link to some?

And on another thread you said you were pro life from implantation. That is how you said ivf. etc is ok..

You haven't answered my question with regards to your daughter's.

basgetti · 22/04/2014 00:12

Bumbley you said on a previous thread that you are against abortion in rape cases because the method of conception doesn't alter the right to life. How is that not pro life from conception?

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 22/04/2014 00:12

I was less than 5 weeks (from date of conception) and I don't see how anyone could compare that to murdering a child. I'm not happy that it happened, in fact it's hard to come to terms with but at that stage I feel it was closer to a fertilised egg than a child or maybe I'm just delusional. As for a late termination, I wouldn't have thought many women would go through it just for the hell of it - I imagine it would be something of an ordeal for the majority.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:13

Where have I denied being on these threads?

Yes, I said I was pro-life from implantation, not conception as you stated above.

I have previously said that I don't have daughters.

Dawndonnaagain · 22/04/2014 00:15

and just so we have a clear idea of Bumbly's agenda here is a post from another thread on the subject:

What about the people who are hurt and suffering from the idea of people having abortions?

Ahh, you're not hurt or suffering from the real life situation of somebody on here, but the idea of an abortion distresses you.
Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting.

missymarmite · 22/04/2014 00:16

I hate the idea of abortion. I think in many situations it is utterly unnecessary; we have access to free contraception, welfare support and there is no shame in being a single unwed mother these days. Destroying a living creature just because it is 'inconvenient' to us leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I certainly can't understand how someone could be vegan/vegetarian for ethical reasons, yet kill a foetus.

That said, I do have a couple of friends who have had an abortion because they felt unable to deal with it, and both of them are lovely people. I just cannot bring myself to judge them. I know that from their POV at the time they felt they had no other option and they did not take the decision lightly. I don't agree with the choice they made, but I understand their reasons.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:17

Vampyr, no one was comparing an early abortion to murdering a child. The reference to murder was made in relation to a discussion about abortion to term which some posters here support the idea of. Eg. A 37 week old foetus.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:19

Dawn, you are continuing your bullying behaviour. If this was any other person on any other thread then posters would be up in arms about the fact that you are dragging quotes from other threads particularly when you are taking them out of context. I am apparently fair game. MNers at their finest.

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 22/04/2014 00:22

and how many women would choose to have an abortion that late without a very good reason? Very few I expect.

bumbleymummy · 22/04/2014 00:27

Does the fact that few people would decide to do it mean that we shouldn't have a law against it? Very few people commit infanticide too.

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