To want my DS aged 3 to wake up in my house on his birthday?

[youbethemummylion]

We are very lucky in that every other weekend ish (depending in other commitments) the PILS have DS1 and 2 to stay from Friday after school to Sunday morning. In the Easter hols me and DH have all the school hols covered except for the Thursday before Good Friday. PILS generously offered to have the kids from Thursday morning through to Monday morning and would take them to the caravan for a little holiday.

All great except Monday is DS2s birthday. I said I didnt want to not see DS2 until the afternoon on his birthday and that we would drive down to caravan on Sunday afternoon/evening to bring kids home so he will wake up here for his birthday. MIL is very annoyed about this saying we have ruined their holiday and now there is no point in going at all and they will just stay home.
AIBU?

I also thought that Op doesn't use them for childcare.
That she is stuck on one day and they offered.

This situation is the perfect catalyst to really rein in the time your dc spend away from you imo.

I doubt it will go down well but you are missing out on so much time with your children that any fall out would be well worth it for me.

If you settle on a weekend a month, I think you should make it clear that they need to be doing trips to clubs etc.
They can't demand to have them but not take any responsibility for them.

I have committed the cardinal sin of not rtft, sorry! On the basis of the 2 pages I have read I don't think yabu at all. I think the gparents are behaving as if they have joint custody of the boys. I was in the same situation as this with my dd and ex parents in.law. From when she was tiny they railroaded me into having her overnight before I was ready and so it continued. It wasn't to help me out it was for them. It escalated to the point where they once cut her hair short on a visit to their house and bought her a pet!

Put your foot down and change things before this gets even more out of hand. You are the parents and you have every right to wake up.with your ds on his birthday. Of course you' re not ruining their plans. They are being vu and petulant.