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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think my neighbour has overreacted?

260 replies

Spottyandstripped · 28/03/2014 18:27

My MIL has a bit of a mouth on her, and yesterday, shouted at our neighbour who accused her of driving too fast into our close as she was putting her kids in the car. MIL shouldn't have said what she did so I went round to try and smooth things over as MIL was really upset.
I spoke to the neighbour and pointed out that MIL was so upset and that she would never hurt a child, but the woman was still very angry about it as it was in front of her children and she was on her own drive. I said I didn't want to argue and she said she didn't care as she had called the police! Wtf! I told her if she did that I'd tell them she didn't supervise her kids properly as I've seen them run out into the road.
I thought she was bluffing but there was a police car there just now! AIBU to think it's a waste of police time if she's just having a moan about my MIL?

OP posts:
FrigginRexManningDay · 28/03/2014 19:02

Post no pist. Grin

Beamur · 28/03/2014 19:02

OP can't see she might be inflaming the situation either, notes on cars, the worst 'apology' after the potty mouthed MIL outburst (poor MIL was upset...) and then even considering trying to get the neighbour into trouble with the Police about supervising her kids. Not nice.

justwantitmadeforme · 28/03/2014 19:03

YABU and so is your dreadful MIL.

Stop defending her.

Your neighbor did the right thing IMO. oh and it does matter if she was speeding. Hmm

Jolleigh · 28/03/2014 19:03

If you have to slam your breaks on after you nearly hit a child, guess what you do? Apologise. Profusely. And check the children aren't too shaken.

Not tell the mother to fuck off and call her a whore.

You're making yourself look particularly bad by continuing to defend your MIL's behaviour OP. And of course by threatening to claim neglect to the police.

Jeremy Kyle would have a fucking field day with you.

TheScience · 28/03/2014 19:03

So your MIL almost knocked down some children in a residential close, and then shouted abuse at their mother in front of them?

peppapigmustdie · 28/03/2014 19:03

If anyone called me a fucking whore in front of my children for telling them off after they nearly knocked them over I too would be calling 101. Disgusting and unjustified reaction by your mil. She needs to learn appropriate reactions to being called out on things she does wrong.

basgetti · 28/03/2014 19:04

Your MIL sounds vile, and so do you for trying to blackmail the neighbour by making nasty threats. Good on her for calling the police.

VivaLeBeaver · 28/03/2014 19:04

One day your MIL will call the wrong person a fucking whore and someone will chin her.

kungfupannda · 28/03/2014 19:06

I'm a criminal lawyer - I deal with stuff like this all the time.

If the police do come round, I strongly advise against arguing the toss. Your neighbour will probably have told them about the note on her entirely legally parked car, your MIL's abuse and your threat. The police may well decide that she's being harassed.

They could certainly arrest your MIL for a public order offence, and you may well find yourself under scrutiny too as you have two negative interactions with her.

I would be inclined to eat some humble pie and see if they'll deal with it informally by way of an apology.

formerbabe · 28/03/2014 19:06

They rent, you own...

Ah I see, OK, I've changed my mind now.

Op...of course your mil should be allowed to drive dangerously, nearly mow down small children and then swear at the mother...

Neverknowingly · 28/03/2014 19:07

Your MIL sounds a right charmer. The police having a word with her is the least she deserves and you sound just as bad with your vindictive threats to tell the police she does not supervise her children properly. Nasty nasty people.

PortofinoRevisited · 28/03/2014 19:07

Jesus. Just saw the fucking whore comment! I would not be able to grovel enough to my neighbours ever to make up for that! Shock

feathermucker · 28/03/2014 19:08

Your MIL was very verbally aggressive towards this woman. She is perfectly entitled to call the police. You then added to it by saying you'd say the neighbour didn't look after her children properly!

You say your MIL is lovely.....yep, she sounds it!Hmm A short fuse is an understatement. If her driving is anything like her temper..........Wink

You sound amazed and surprised and very indignant (wtf is that about?!)

Your MIL probably terrified this woman!

YABVU!

CoffeeTea103 · 28/03/2014 19:11

Send your mil on Jeremy Kyle she has the mouth for it.

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 28/03/2014 19:12

I cant believe you don't see how disgusting your MIL's behaviour was OP Shock that anyone can defend someone acting way. lovely MIL my arse

Not sure grovelling apologies would work on me if some nasty foulmouthed grot bag had called me a fucking whore and told me to fuck off in front of my kids either Hmm probably best to take whatever the police say to you (if they do visit and I think they should- you and your MIL sound as horrible as each other) I think staying out of their way is best.

VivaLeBeaver · 28/03/2014 19:13

You're not my SIL are you?

It kind of sounds like something my batshit crazy mother might do. Actually calling someone a whore might be a step too far for my mum.

My mum fell out with my SIL's neighbours about parking in the street and my mum was an arse and called them names. My SIL being a normal person realised that my mum was totally wrong and grovelled like mad.

SybilRamkin · 28/03/2014 19:13

This has got to be a reverse AIBU!

If not - YABVVU!

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone · 28/03/2014 19:15

You own, they rent?

Congratulations - because the only difference that makes is that while your neighbour would have no trouble moving to get shot of her shitty aggressive neighbours and their fucking awful grandmother, YOU'D legally have to declare a dispute with the neighbours if you wanted to try and sell your house. Ha ha!

Lottiedoubtie · 28/03/2014 19:15

You can't complain about legally parked cars Hmm

Ffs

WetAugust · 28/03/2014 19:16

You are bang out of order OP. You should have directed your anger at your stupid, dangerous MIL. I would ring the Police too in your neighbour's situation.

OwlCapone · 28/03/2014 19:17

Your MIL had to slam on her brakes to avoid some children. She was driving too fast for the road. The speed limit is a maximum not a target.

feathermucker · 28/03/2014 19:17

You are beyond ridiculous OP Hmm

You own, they rent......erm, so?! The relevance of that is......pray, do enlighten us.....

Your attempts to justify this are becoming ever more ridiculous.

If there was a car parked obscuring her view, then any decent driver would have automatically taken more care.

Stop trying to justify this and admit that your MIL was abusive and very much in the wrong!

Original poster
Spottyandstripped · 28/03/2014 19:18

We own our house and have lived here for years and I know her landlord, who I emailed and told them how annoying it is that they don't supervise their kids and that she'd upset my MIL and that she shouldn't have shouted at her and should park more considerately even if it's legal. If she can overreact then so can I! Are you really all so OP faced that a bit of swearing makes you ring the police? Really?

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 28/03/2014 19:18

There is no way the OP is coming back

Stupid people never do, and they never admit they have the sense of a rather dim barnacle

LaurieFairyCake · 28/03/2014 19:18

What a fantastic cross post with the barnacle