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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DH is talking out of his arse?

146 replies

TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 09:47

Re: holidays.
We have two small dcs. 3 yo and 1 yo.
Last year we had a great villa holiday (v. Fortunate) it was lovely. Warm weather, relaxing enough because all amenities on hand IYSWIM. Got to do and see stuff.
He stubbornly insists maintains that an all inclusive hotel hols would be better. He thinks "everyone" agrees with that. He simply doesn't see what I am complaining about.
I think a hotel room, however comfortable, sounds like a fucking nightmare in our situation. I can't bear the idea of not having the convenient base that self catering gives you IYSWIM. Every meal taken in a massive dining room with two little ones. I'm getting chest pain just thinking about it.
Aibu? Is he right?
Or is he talking shit?

OP posts:
Papaluigi · 26/03/2014 09:49

YANBU. Sod that. Villa every time for us.

Catnuzzle · 26/03/2014 09:49

I'm with you. All Inclusive is my idea of hell with 2 small children....

NotJustACigar · 26/03/2014 09:50

YANBU a holiday should be enjoyable for everyone, not just him. And many people think all inclusives are usually overcrowded, noisy, shoddy hellscapes with poor food. What did he think about the villa holiday and why doesn't he want to do something like that again?

whatsthatcomingoverthehill · 26/03/2014 09:50

Chest pain just thinking about it? Seriously?

There are advantages to either situation. It's personal preference, and he wants one you the other. There is no right or wrong.

Dieu · 26/03/2014 09:51

It's personal preference at the end of the day. I love hotels, especially all-inclusive, as everything is done for you. This to me feels more like a holiday. We went to one which had a dedicated room for the preparation of baby feeds. So they can be very child friendly. I do see it from your POV too though, as your youngest is still very young. Just don't rule it out altogether!

whitepuddingsupper · 26/03/2014 09:52

I'm choosing all inclusive rather than a villa this summer because of the fact that I don't want to be cooking or supermarket shopping on holiday, I've tried self catering and it was a hassle IMHO. I only have the one child though.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 09:53

Tbh whatsthatcomingoverthehill I thought the chest pain comment was obviously sardonic.
However, yes, it does make me feel stressed.
Anyway. As he seems to think that "everyone" agrees with him I thought; where better than MN aibu to test it out?

OP posts:
Impatientismymiddlename · 26/03/2014 09:54

I think all inclusive is great as you hint have to even think about cooking or where to go to eat. However, I would insist on all inclusive in an apartment hotel rather than a standard room as you need more facilities with little ones.

2madboys · 26/03/2014 09:54

We did villa holiday when our boys were tiny. The great thing is that you can put them to bed when you want and you don't have to sit in the dark with them! It was also good having our own pool, where we could easily keep an eye on them and there weren't crowds of other people. They are now 10 and 13 and all inclusive would be perfect for us (if we could afford it!) as they like to make friends on holiday and don't need to go to bed early.

Dieu · 26/03/2014 09:55

I too did it this morning, and it turns out I'm the unreasonable one. I'd much rather know that though, so I'm glad I asked! I expect your responses will be more varied, as holidays are such a personal thing.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 09:56

Hmm. I can see that not having to cook and clean would be an advantage.
He's a very hands on dad too. So it's not like he'd be lounging about leaving me too it much.
But getting up and dressed for all those meals. Toddler by the pool. No privacy. It just seems scary and stressful.

OP posts:
whatsthatcomingoverthehill · 26/03/2014 09:56

Oh ok, well it seems a bit of an over reaction to be getting so stressed about it. But as you can see by this thread, no, "everyone" doesn't agree with him. He's just trying to win the argument to get what he wants (but are you sure you're not doing the same?).

BlackeyedSusan · 26/03/2014 09:56

self catering. no meltdowns over the wrong sort of breakfast bowl or not enough milk or the worng cereal or anything actually. too many people causing stress.

Dieu · 26/03/2014 09:57

2madboys, I'd always book an interconnecting room. In as much as I love hotels and AI resorts, I cannot think of anything worse than all of us sharing a room for 2 weeks.

MoominsYonisAreScary · 26/03/2014 09:57

I do think villas are better when they are little and alk inclusive when they are older

Nocomet · 26/03/2014 09:58

I love hotels and hate self cattering.

Go to an aparta hotel in Majorca, best of both.

Fridge, cooker and if you go half board breakfast and dinner cooked for you.

Small DCs always find something they like (even fuss pot DD2), the buffets are arranged so they do.

Lots of other DCs to watch, which one year olds love.

cathpip · 26/03/2014 09:58

Hotels all the way with dh and I, and then the dc arrived! We will only ever do self catering villa now as we have 3 under 5. The thought of having to keep the kids quiet incase they disturb other guests etc etc. villa, private pool, barbecue (and yes sadly a washing machine:)) are perfect for us as a young family, and we do eat out every day so that I don't have to cook. We will go back to hotels but when the dc are much older.

sunbathe · 26/03/2014 09:58

Villa all the way.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 09:58

2madboys that's part of it for me. In a villa we have the chance to sit down together after they're in bed. We can eat a meal or have a glass of wine. In a hotel you can't do that.

OP posts:
Dieu · 26/03/2014 09:59

OP, a good upmarket-ish AI resort will pretty much have food round the clock. So having to be all dressed for breakfast at 9 shouldn't be too much of an issue anyway.

MoominsYonisAreScary · 26/03/2014 09:59

My youngest two are the same age, i wouldnt want to do all inclusive atm. Although ive also said i really dont fancy taking them out of the country either at this age!

ThefutureMrsTatum · 26/03/2014 09:59

A self catering villa is my idea of hell, busman's holiday springs to mind. I'd be doing the same everyday crap (cooking, washing up, tidying) but in a warmer climate. you can get a family room with separate bedrooms. eat at a time when the DC are hungry and not over tired.

Pumpkinpositive · 26/03/2014 10:00

Horses for courses, neither of you is right or wrong. Just a matter of personal preference.

Can't understand why an all inclusive hotel is a "nightmare" in your "situation". Confused

If last year's holiday was spent at the venue of your choice though, maybe it should be his choice this year to pick the location? Turn about every holiday?

ThefutureMrsTatum · 26/03/2014 10:01

You can sit down together at an all inclusive, just takes drinks back to your room and sit on the veranda.

ivykaty44 · 26/03/2014 10:02

all inclusive package holiday is my idea of boring holiday with luke warm buffett food, crowds of people and noisy night entertainment . But I haven't tried this type of holiday so really you need to ask everyone that has been.

I have been half board on a holiday to tenerife with two girl friends and that didn't inspire me to want to do it again or go full board or all inclusive

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