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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DH is talking out of his arse?

146 replies

TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 09:47

Re: holidays.
We have two small dcs. 3 yo and 1 yo.
Last year we had a great villa holiday (v. Fortunate) it was lovely. Warm weather, relaxing enough because all amenities on hand IYSWIM. Got to do and see stuff.
He stubbornly insists maintains that an all inclusive hotel hols would be better. He thinks "everyone" agrees with that. He simply doesn't see what I am complaining about.
I think a hotel room, however comfortable, sounds like a fucking nightmare in our situation. I can't bear the idea of not having the convenient base that self catering gives you IYSWIM. Every meal taken in a massive dining room with two little ones. I'm getting chest pain just thinking about it.
Aibu? Is he right?
Or is he talking shit?

OP posts:
UncleT · 26/03/2014 12:09

EEating - that just sounds like a crap resort. I'm sure they vary a lot.

EEatingSoupForLunch · 26/03/2014 12:17

Sorry posted too soon! Uncle the resort would have been great with older DCs in summer, just not with a toddler out of season. I think hot weather holidays are for when they are about 7 anyway rather than little ones - you have to monitor them by water and plaster them in sun cream, and sleeping gets disturbed. I am happy to holiday in UK for now. Wish DH agreed.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 12:25

Dh definitely gets a say. I am the more malleable half here.
I just think that most parents of very young dcs would prefer a villa to hotel. He reckons that "everyone" he talks to says otherwise.
But he also tells me that "everyone else's dcs sleep through the night from 4 weeks old" so I'm not given to taking his word for everything.

I am seeing some advantages though, after reading here, of the hotel arrangement. But I still think its a lot of stress comated to sc. also, I'm still bf dd. not really going to be enjoying the piña coladas.

OP posts:
MaryWestmacott · 26/03/2014 12:25

Well, if you are going to do AI, you need to go at least 4* - or you will get the queuing situation.

I'd recommend looking at a Mark Warner one - we've been with them and no queuing for meals, good range of foods. Kids clubs for half day for your age range means you get some time to yourself to relax/go scuba diving etc if you want to (my DH went off mountain biking a couple of mornings, leaving me with a pile of books on the beach until lunchtime, bliss!) - big lunch with the DCs, play in the pool/beach with them all afternoon - with as many icecreams as your DCs can eat without havnig to pay for it, then a toddler tea around 5:30ish, free evening childcare means you can then eat dinner in peace - and have drinks on your balcony, or with 2 DCs, get a family room/mini-suite - which basically means you have 2 interconnecting rooms. and failing that, doesn't everyone have sex in the bathrooms when sharing holiday rooms with dcs?

Oh and any resort that is set up for family friendly holidays rather than aimed at a grown up market, you won't have to keep them on their best behaviour, it's a different feel than a grown up holiday.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 12:26

Yes uk would suit. Maybe Europe, but not med or Spain in height of summer.
Will check out links.
Thanks

OP posts:
MaryWestmacott · 26/03/2014 12:31

Well, make the most of being able to go outside of school holidays as well, May/June places in the med won't be too hot, although make sure you have aircon!

Going at those sort of times as well means it'll be full of other families with pre-schoolers and similar aged DCs for your older one to play with on the beach.

FryOneFatManic · 26/03/2014 12:38

Who is "everyone" your DH is talking about? Cos, I'm another one who doesn't do AI. We've had cottage holidays since time began.

And although it's classed as self catering, I've never cooked a meal. I just make sure we have breakfast stuff in the place and the rest of the time we eat out, varying where we go.

I don't clean much either, just make sure it's okay when we leave (and DP and DCs pitch in with that, after all, it's a holiday for all of us).

Chattymummyhere · 26/03/2014 12:45

All inclusive... I cook on our England holidays and when at home. I don't want to rent a villa and cook there as well.

The choice of food in the places we have been to has been wide and something for everyone, unlimited drinks and food is heavenly.

No worrying your bottled water ran out so nothing to drink just pop to the bar and order some juice/coffee/tea or alcohol if you want, entertainment, other children of all ages to play with.

You may even make some new friends.

SanityClause · 26/03/2014 12:45

We have had a villa or apartment since the DC were babies, although had one or two holidays at suite hotels. I have never had an AI holiday, though.

We found it easier, as we didn't have to worry about disturbing cleaners if the DC needed naps, and didn't have to eat mountains of food in a restaurant, if we only wanted a small snack.

Also, we like to have sex when we are on holiday Shock and have often found it difficult finding affordable holidays where we were not sharing with our DC.

SanityClause · 26/03/2014 12:46

And you don't have to cook if you have a villa or apartment, if you rent one which is in walking distance from restaurants.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 12:48

Mary that's it. You've talked me into booking a holiday.
Based on other posts I'll be conceding to AI but asking for a decent room/ apartment.
fry well, quite. Grin

OP posts:
wigglesrock · 26/03/2014 12:52

I've done both with kids. I like AI, it's handiest with our kids now - they like the company of other kids, any AI we've went on have had playgrounds etc in the complex which was brilliant when the kids were very young. Weve never had to queue for food, although we didn't do all meals in the dining area - we liked to eat at the poolbar, bring some food to our balcony or the like.

I went to villas when my kids were babies (under 1) it just wasn't for me. I ended up feeling like it was like home but with better weather which is not really what I wanted.

Stripytop · 26/03/2014 12:58

I'm sure you'll have a great time Amanda.

When you're checking out rooms though, do it on the phone or in person as there are often much better room options than those offered online.

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 13:01

Thanks stripy

OP posts:
edwinbear · 26/03/2014 13:01

OP here is my review of our holiday in an AI hotel last year. Show your DH this and he will soon change his mind.

www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g297962-d600132-r162572431-Titanic_Beach_Lara_Hotel-Antalya_Turkish_Mediterranean_Coast.html#CHECK_RATES_CONT

Original poster
TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/03/2014 13:09

Oooh. Thanks. Wil look.

OP posts:
LtEveDallas · 26/03/2014 13:26

Ohh Edwin, I wouldn't have posted that. The Managers reply and the other excellent reviews of that hotel (especially the ones who visited about the same time) make yours look a liitle awkward

OnIlkleyMoorBahTwat · 26/03/2014 13:34

Yes, Edwin, complaining that a hotel didn't give you a birthday present why would they makes you look a little precious.

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 26/03/2014 14:03

We like to go AI.

The reason is that on a day to day basis we seem to spend a lot of time meeting the children's needs (focusing, shopping, cleaning etc) and when on holiday I want to be able to enjoy playing with them. Secondly it feels far more like a holiday if the second the little buggers darlings go to sleep you can sit down and relax until they wake up an hour later morning.

However, on an AI holiday it is absolutely vital you pick the right one.if you get the wrong one then it will be awful as you are stuck there. Things that come to mind to make it a good experience are:-

Villa style rooms - not a hotel.
Separate room for kids to sleep in.
Kids activities. (My kids generally don't do them but the fact that they exist means it will be kid friendly.)
Very wide mealtimes - breakfast 6 - 10:30, lunch 12 - 3:30, dinner 6 - 10 where we went last year.
Big place - so lots of choice for pools, meals etc
Several restaurants - even the loveliest buffet gets boring after a while so it's nice to have a Chinese / Italian / Canarian restaurant for a change.

Oh - and no matter how lively your Inlaws are (and mine are very lovely) do not let your dh talk you into sharing a 2 bed apartment with them and your 2 year old!

Trip adviser is your new best friend.

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 26/03/2014 14:04

Grrrr at IPad!

Cooking - not focusing!

Longdistance · 26/03/2014 14:08

Club Med all inclusive all the way then you csn dump the kids in the Kids Club

wobblyweebles · 26/03/2014 14:09

We looked at AI holidays this year. The downside seemed to be that unless you went for a really top end resort, there were a lot of complaints that either it was difficult to book the restaurants people wanted at times that suited them, and that the resorts were so huge you could end up in a room a very long way away from the pool etc.

They did cost a fair bit more too, although possibly worth it if you drank enough :-)

We went for a condo in the end, with a pool and beach right outside the door.

wobblyweebles · 26/03/2014 14:10

The AI place we were looking at did have the most amazing pools and playgrounds though.

ginmakesitallok · 26/03/2014 14:22

A big part of going on holiday for me is eating out, finding that perfect little taverna by the sea and watching the sun go down while kids play on the beach... Bliss. A fair few places are really struggling as more people go ai and spend less of their money in local facilities.

We always go sc, but rarely eat in the apartment.

Topseyt · 26/03/2014 15:07

When our children were the age of yours we did both types of holiday. We often did self catering because MIL owned an apartment in Majorca, which we could visit very cheaply. It was in an area where there was a huge choice of bars and restaurants to choose from, and also very child friendly too. She has sold the apartment since then though, so we can't do that one now.

We also went on a couple of all-inclusive holidays. If you choose carefully they are fine too, and I did like not having to cook or clean. There is something to be said for each type of holiday really.

As others have said, if you choose a good hotel with a kids club etc. then you should be fine.

Why not give it a try this time around? If it then really isn't to your liking then you can go self catering again next time.