To think my friends drink too much?

[blanchedeveraux]

Firstly, I'd like to establish that I know it's none of my business, but a couple we are good friends with are drinking more and more every time we socialise with them and their 18 year old DS has been drinking illegally in pubs for about 3 years with fake ID and already has a huge beer gut.

Maybe I'm in the wrong but do you think this sounds like excessive alcohol consumption?

Met up at 12 noon for early lunch. Both of them drank 2 bottles of wine each with lunch. We then went to the pub (3pm by now) and by 7pm they had a further 8 pints of lager each. Me and DH were floored by this time (hadn't drunk nearly as much but were comparative lightweights). We got a cab home and I texted the following day to thank them for a good day out and asked how much longer they had stayed. She replied "Oh, we were there till midnight, I'm more lager than woman now ha ha".

Neither of them ever seem to suffer from hangovers or any obvious ill effects (although both are putting on a LOT of weight).

They are self employed and go out to the pub almost every night of the week.

They are good company and we only see them about once a month but every time they seem to be drinking more than ever.

Just wondered what others thought?

If they drank that much and were still standing ? It's possible but it means that that is the sort of consumption their bodies are used to. That doesn't bode well for their livers, their business or anyone else on the road while they're going about their daily work.

And what many people do overlook (as someone upthread said) is that people who are routinely drinking too much are often routinely drink-driving

We have nothing to prove they're drink driving so mentioning that is a bit

Just because someone likes a drink doesn't mean they also break the law and endangers someone's life.

I'm the OP and it was me who mentioned the driving thing. I can only assume that in most cases they get one of their employees to do the driving from site to site the following day, I don't really want to think about the alternative..

Surely they can't have had that much? Was the wine low alcohol, lambrini or something like that

Nursey

The OP said they drink like this a lot. She says they drive daily.

Sometimes the wake-up call for heavy drinkers is a drink-driving charge.

I don't think it's outrageous to mention it.

I wish people would stop saying "they can't have drunk that much". They did, that's the point of my thread. No, the wine wasn't low alcohol.

Well nursey id they go to thw pub most nights amd theirjob ibvolves drivinf I don't think it's a huge leap

Sorry blanche. Wasnt disbeliving you as such just expressibg my disbelief in general.

They must be minted!

Or up yo their eyeballs in debt

A relative is a functional alcoholic. He'd drink and drive, because what would affect an occasional drinker and alert them to the fact they'd had too much, would have no effect on him. He couldn't not drink when he drove. That's another sign. He couldn't modify his drinking behaviour for the sake of his or other people's safety

"Both of them drank 2 bottles of wine each with lunch."

After half a bottle I feel like I have had enough, besides any more gives me a migraine. Maybe being a migraine sufferer protects my liver.

Nursey, It was brave of you to be so honest. Have you sought any help for your probelm?

Or carrying bottles of vodka around in large purses to prime their pumps.

Maybe some people like drinking that much, Bun, and don't want 'help' for their 'problem'

As long as they are not endangering others by it (which doesn't seem the case here as the couple drive), live and let live.

Nursey

I am not talking about everyone who drinks.

It's quite telling that they don't get hangovers,you are right to worry about their drinking. It probably doesn't seem that bad to them because they are used to large amounts.

Do you think that they have any insight into how abnormal their drinking habits are? If you mentioned that you were going dry for a month would they join you or show a defensive reaction?

I hope they don't drink drive but it's not unreasonable to bring the subject up. Once you've had a few too many your ability to make a decision is so badly impaired that intelligent,sensible people can make stupid decisions about driving. Hopefully not your friends op!

I don't think that there is anything you can do directly. You can talk about going on a health kick yourself or how much better you feel for cutting on booze or whatever but they don't sound like they are ready to embrace a teetotal way of life just yet!

It is a lot but it doesn't seem to be negatively impacting on your enjoyment of time with them or, unless you know otherwise, ability to run their business so it's none of your business.

Even if you are genuinely concerned healthwise, they won't thank you for your input.

If it worries you arrange to meet in a non-drinking place (I wouldn't be able to meet them in a drinkinglace as their bar tab would be huge)!

There aren't too many non-drinking places open after work, expat. It's how they make their money. (I mean, I'm sure there are some but I just can't think of many right now.) And it's real difficult to avoid the ' Oh let's just go next door' once you're there - if you find one.

I thought this was going to be the usual mumsnet comment 'my friend has a glass of wine when she is caring for her child' - but two bottles each, even I am shocked & by mumsnet standards I am probably a heavy drinker.

She met them for lunch at a weekend. So suggest Costa instead.

The two bottles and then EIGHT pints of lager! Then they stayed after the OP left!

Staggering amount of alcohol. I almost don't believe someone could physically be able to drink this amount in that time scale but if they really did the IMO they definitely have a problem. Not normal at ALL!

They must be the size of houses.

How much is a bottle of wine when you buy it from pub or restaurant these days?