AIBU to buy my son a dress for his 3rd Birthday

[thebadwife]

Just that really, I have always tried to dress my son in the most practical clothes for the activities of the day. The colour has never been important, which when was younger led to him being assumed to be a girl as often as he was a boy. Sometimes he wore leggings but mostly standard trousers, t-shirts and jumpers nothing particularly exciting, experimental or political.

However I have just had a daughter and my friends and family have been very generous and given us some lovely clothes for her which have included a few dresses. My son has always commented positively when I wear dresses, but has been really jealous of these tiny dresses and has asked several times if he can wear them. I told him they were too small but I would buy him a dress for his birthday in May. I have mentioned it to a few people and they have looked at me like I am crazy.

So AIBU?

5madthings Goths are usually very sweet. Possibly because they get criticised for the way they dress too.

Yes mrsdevere I like my kids to look well dressed as well, partly as I had ds1 young so I was already judged for being a young parent and didn't want to give anyone anything else to judge me about.

But as long as clothes are clean and fit for purpose then I have just had to let go a bit ad they have developed their own likes and dislikes.

And I won't tell my children they are freaks or weird in what they like, eeven if they go against the current social norms, I will explain to them that some people may not like it but I won't tell them they can't do it or mock them for it as some on here have said they would.

coffee you have no way of knowing if you've seen a boy in a dress. Small children are androgynous, unless you know the child the indicators are the clothes. Girls get mistaken for boys. Most people assumed my best friend's first daughter was a boy because of the way she dressed

coffee come on my schoolrun there is one little boy who frequently wears a dress or fairy outfit. He is three and no one says anything or if they do its only don't you look funky/cute.

A child has to be very self confident to not mind being laughed at.

Or perhaps the child mixes in circles where he/she won't be laughed at? Or is self confident because he/she has had a supportive upbringing where they are allowed to express themself and are happy to do so? Or because their parents haven't ridiculed them for daring to be a little bit "out there"?

You could also wonder why so many MN mums are keen to get their sons in dresses

No one on this thread says they are 'keen'. The prevailing attitude is that posters will let their kids wear what they want to wear, not 'get them into' anything.

FFS.

If you laugh at or mock a child because of what they are wearing , you are an asshole of the highest order.

I would be interested to hear from some teachers to see if they have experience of dress wearing boys?

I'm certain that nursery teachers will have...they have seen mine in a rather fetching pink tutu; with feathers!

Ive just asked ds2 11 yr6 wgat he thought the children would say if they saw ds3 3 in a dress.

He said some of them wouldnt say anything but the not so nice kids would laugh and probably call him names

I think seeing boys in tutus and other types of dress up clothes is much more common than a normal dress. I have four kids and have worked in a lot of schools but can't remember ever seeing a boy in a dress. I've seen pyjamas, the odd pink or sparkly top, girls trainers and dress up clothes but never a normal dress.

there you have it Moomins; "the not so nice kids" who, ime, tend to be the offspring of "the not so nice parents"

i would definitely buy a dress if he wanted it.

I don't think that anyone has a problem with tutus, fairy wings etc because dressing up is quite different. It is buying and wearing a normal dress that people find odd.

I don't find it follows. I know some delightful children with horrible parents and I know some horrible children who have the most delightful parents.

Get him one to dress up in.

I think it highly unlikely that any adult would laught at or make adverse comments about a boy in a dress it's the other children who might. My friend's little boy used to share his older sister's dressing up clothes and often appeared on the school run wearing a princess outfit. That is very different from a boy being bought a normal day dress.
If a man chooses to wear a dress for whatever reason that is absolutely fine or a teenage boy for that matter but I (and this is no criticism of those who differ) would not encourage a little boy to wear a dress. I can't believe I keep joining this discussion!

So do any boys wear a dress to school?

DS has worn dressing-up dresses at school and after school club.
When he started school, he only had (we're a classy bunch) a pink Chinese party dress with white fur trim.
Obvs we wouldn't send DD into school either in this, as it wouldn't stand up to the rough and tumble).

He would wear various dressing-up type dresses at school and ASC and this is actually how it all started.

No-one minded, and he's very popular.

He doesn't do it so much at school now, but tends to wear his fave dress under the circs I've outlined upthread.

I actually didnt mean dressing up dresses. I meant ordinary ones. Sorry, my post was not very clear.