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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be put off by this?

544 replies

DomesticDisgrace · 15/03/2014 23:39

Please tell me I'm being unreasonable! I met this really really lovely guy today and I was hoping he'd ask me out because we hit it off instantly! When I came home he did and I was absolutely delighted, we decided on the cinema and he texted saying "I'll book the tickets, can you look after the grub?"
I can't help but be really put off by him now, I'm disgusted with myself Blush
I haven't been on a date in about six years as I was with my ex and he wasn't working for the majority of our relationship so I'm super scared of ending up with a stinge (this guy is working by the way)

Am I being horrible? It's really put me off him!

OP posts:
BumpyGrindy · 15/03/2014 23:59

Why give him a chance? He's just showed that he's at best lacking in any grace and at worst that he's a penny pinching twit.

If it's one or the other, neither's good enough.

AskBasil · 16/03/2014 00:00

No you're not.

Grub.

That would put me off.

Original poster
DomesticDisgrace · 16/03/2014 00:02

It just occurred to me that there's a Burger king beside the cinema. Surely he doesn't mean there??

OP posts:
wannaBe · 16/03/2014 00:03

good god no wonder people never find a date if this is how hung up people are on things like wording. Hmm
How many people aren't sure whether to ask or not to ask about paying on the actual date.... and now here we have one who has an issue with the word "grub," Op you sound like a snob and he would be well rid.

OldBagWantsNewBag · 16/03/2014 00:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BumpyGrindy · 16/03/2014 00:04

Yummies is worse than grub!

aquashiv · 16/03/2014 00:05

Pop into liddl and bring a back pack of goodies. If he's careful with money he will be impressed. If you are then you wont be fleeced. If it's his use of the word grub hmmmm are you really that bothered.

WooWooOwl · 16/03/2014 00:06

That would put me off too.

MyFirstName · 16/03/2014 00:07

Go. Give him a chance. He may have spent ages agonising over the wording. Not wanting you/feminist beliefs to be offended by him offering to pay, he suggested you could share the costs. Or he may be a bit crass with wording. Go. Find out.

HillyHolbrook · 16/03/2014 00:07

You've thought way too far into this I think!

I don't see a problem with him asking if you'll do halves on the date. The only thing wrong is his wording like he's texting another bloke.

Don't fret about it, I'm sure he does just mean grabbing popcorn or whatever. You'll be putting yourself off more by worrying so much! Just play it by ear, if he comes off as stingy later on, then learn from your ex and leave, but if he is so lovely then you'll kick yourself for letting popcorn ruin what could be something goodGrin

cakewitch · 16/03/2014 00:08

Just the word 'grub' would have me running in the opposite direction.

MyFirstName · 16/03/2014 00:08

X-post. And I agree. You sound rather up yourself tbh.

Famzilla · 16/03/2014 00:08

Nothing says romance like going halves on a big whopper!

tulipsaredelicious · 16/03/2014 00:11

Go. Maybe he's being considerate, doesn't know what you'd like. Go, find out! And don't be mardy with him and spoil it from the start!

OldBagWantsNewBag · 16/03/2014 00:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AskBasil · 16/03/2014 00:11

"good god no wonder people never find a date if this is how hung up people are on things like wording"

Don't be too fussy now.

You might end up - shock horror - single

That would be awful. Far more awful than having to spend your life with someone who says grub.

SomewhereBeyondTheSea · 16/03/2014 00:12

Just reply saying 'righteo then' and go along expecting friendship only.

Preciousbane · 16/03/2014 00:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

trufflesnuffler · 16/03/2014 00:14

Grub is the now used by teens to mean blowjobs. so calm down op, you just have to suck his cock in return for cinema tickets Grin

MyPrettyToes · 16/03/2014 00:16

If I was him I would run a mile. Agonising over a word...

OP, don't bother going. Your posts read as though you have already decided he is beneath you. I agree with wannaBe you sound like a snob.

HillyHolbrook · 16/03/2014 00:17

truffle It is? I'm only 21 and I've never heard it before in my life! Now I feel really out of touch, just like I did when I didn't understand the concept of SnapchatGrin

Well if it's that he's after, then YANBU. Bit forward if you ask meWink

trufflesnuffler · 16/03/2014 00:19

I may be winding up OP lemonycrickets Wink

SinisterSal · 16/03/2014 00:21

I know a guy who calls it 'fodder' - like what farmers give livestock

So grub sounds positively posh/

Caitlin17 · 16/03/2014 00:25

I don't think there is anything snobbish about being put off by his using the word "grub"

It's a very odd thing to say anyway. You're going to the cinema, what "grub" needs to be organised for that? If, when you arrive one or both of you is hungry or thirsty, then buy something there. I find unless there's been "cock-up on the catering front" I can get through a film without "grub".

If he is the type of person who thinks going to the cinema has to involve buckets of popcorn I would be put off.

AskBasil · 16/03/2014 00:39

LOL.

God yes.

Fucking popcorn. And buckets of coca cola. Why? Why can't you just watch the fucking film?

What film is it btw? Is there any mileage in slating his choice of film alongside the grub? Grin

Also, fodder sounds posher than grub to me.

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