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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that parents should occasionally let their pubic hair grow as nature intended to educate their children as to what adult bodies look like?

192 replies

ikeaismylocal · 27/02/2014 20:41

I have been having this discussion with dp, our dc are still very young so puberty is a long way off but I was wondering how children know that pubic hair is normal if they only every see their parents with minimal/absent pubic hair?

Dp has light hair and shaves his pubic hair most of the time so he doesn't really have any visable pubic hair, obviously that is his preference and his right to choose but do parents owe it to their children to show them what an unmodified adult body looks like so it isn't such a shock to them when they thelself start growing pubic hair?

A friend of mine told me that her 10 year old recently told her her pubic hair "needed a trip" the 10 year old will very likely have her own pubic hair soon and the idea of her thinking the correct thing to do is trim or get rid of the hair compleatly really makes me feel something has gone wrong in our society (and I remember the state of my legs when I first experimented with shaving!).

OP posts:
lovelysnow · 27/02/2014 21:24

I don't worry about my kids seeing me in a natural state, the way I see things - any prudishness just makes it harder if (when) they need someone to talk to.. but each to their own. As for modification, helping them form a balanced view can't hurt.. kids are much more likely to get exposed to porn at a younger age these days - whether we like it or not - that is just life in a digital society... so it would be pretty warping if they think everyone is supposed to look like someone from those films.

TetrisBlock · 27/02/2014 21:24

I'm being ridiculous, sorry. I see most I the posts here are serious arguments.

JohnFarleysRuskin · 27/02/2014 21:24

Eww pubic hair is discusting

Joking!

Op, it's fine, there are plenty of us keeping it on for the well being of the next generation. Or something like that.

Thebluedog · 27/02/2014 21:25

My mates DH likes her 'natural' I'm insanely jealous GrinGrinGrinGrin

sassytheFIRST · 27/02/2014 21:26

My girls see all sorts of adult female naked bods in the shower at the gym. They are aware that I shave my legs and pits and that I have a hairy bum beard: I do a bit of judicious pruning before a swim but that's about my limit.

JohnFarleysRuskin · 27/02/2014 21:27

Loads of men do - Or they did circa 2005-2007.

HadABadDay2014 · 27/02/2014 21:29

I don't like pubic hair on myself, I will be telling DD it's her choice.

WorraLiberty · 27/02/2014 21:29

Most kids would prefer to look like their friends than their parents anyway

Otherwise the world would be full of little Mini Me's.

sassytheFIRST · 27/02/2014 21:30

Snurk at Take Back Your Body Hair...

I want a MuffsOutMarch. With placards. Mine will read Up with the Fanjo Fuzz! Minges are a beautician-free zone!

Original poster
ikeaismylocal · 27/02/2014 21:33

It looks like I am mostly unreasonable. I do concern myself with odd things.

I don't shave anywhere and I don't pluck my eyebrows or dye my hair, I used to dye my hair as I have a very dull hair colour (mousy brown) but I thought it would be important for me to try to have a positive opinion of my hair which is likely be the same colour as my dc's hair.

OP posts:
bochead · 27/02/2014 21:34

Show em a text book if you wanna demonstrate natural forms - whaddya doing prancing about in your birthday suit in front of the kids for anyway?

I much prefer the old school stiff upper lip school of parenting to all this modern nonsense Grin.

sonlypuppyfat · 27/02/2014 21:38

I would have some concerns about a man who shaved.

morethanpotatoprints · 27/02/2014 21:42

My dd is proud of hers and couldn't wait to tell me she has them Grin
She used to see me getting dressed, when she was little but not as she got older.
Our dc aren't really invited to our bedroom, have never once been in our bed, its our only sanctuary.
So, I don't think its inevitable they will see you out of the shower or getting dressed etc.
Don't get me started on swimming. Memories of that comedy sketch Smack the pony, "Do you think they'll notice a few wisps"? Therr was a full bush hanging out of her costume. Grin Please somebody tell me they remember this, it was hilarious.

gamerchick · 27/02/2014 21:44

people decide what to do with their own bushes in their own time.... they don't need their parents as a role model.

Pregnantberry · 27/02/2014 21:47

Huh, I never really thought about it, but interesting for me because I shave the lot off, and yes, I will hold my hands up and say a large reason for that is to do with sex, so I wouldn't really want my kids to get body expectations based off me wanting to look sexually appealing.

I also remember seeing my mum naked when I was little and based off that I knew to expect pubes in the future... I would be concerned it would freak my DD out if the first time she ever saw pubes was when they suddenly started sprouting out of her.

mygrandchildrenrock · 27/02/2014 21:48

Lauriefairycake Less than 2% of men remove pubic hair And 11% of women do topiary
How do you know? No-one has asked me or my dh!

bochead · 27/02/2014 21:49

helicopter parenting taken to the extreme. Show em a textbook on puberty and have a few sensible discussions while fully clothed.

rollonthesummer · 27/02/2014 21:49

DH doesn't trim his pubes and I only do when I'm sunbathing or going swimming! We're not scarily hairy ;)

purpleroses · 27/02/2014 21:55

My DD is 10 and has seen and commented on mine - she thinks it's hideous and should be kept out of sight Shock

But I do think she'd find it even more shocking to have it appear on her own body having not ever seen what it looks like on an adult woman, so yes I agree with you OP that it's not a bad thing for children to see what adult bodies look like before they develop them themselves.

Waltonswatcher1 · 27/02/2014 22:03

Initially I thought this was a weirdo post ,then after pausing I kinda see your point .
If both you and dad are baldies ,then the kids are going to have a bit of a shock coming .
YANBU
(Never seen a willy without a wig and I don't think I want to)

Mabelandmaude · 27/02/2014 22:06

Should we not dye our hair? Wear make up?

I like to keep neat and tidy thank you. Keeping well groomed makes me feel good!

TheArticFunky · 27/02/2014 22:07

I do get your point. The thing is I have mine dyed red, white and blue for the summers patriotic events and at Christmas I have a festive green and little beads that look like baubles. If I go au natural I'm worried that the children will lose sight of their cultural roots.

MrsBennetsEldest · 27/02/2014 22:13

I've just read your post to my 3 boys ( 19, 17 and 15). Oh how we laughed and laughed and then laughed some more. They told me not to bother on their account.

Joysmum · 27/02/2014 22:55

I shave now, but we now have a loft conversion and ensuite so DD doesn't see me nude anymore. This has come at the same time as trying to reach DD that now she is a young lady, rather than a child, she needs to learn about modesty and personal space etc.

Prior to that, I just did my bikini line and certainly wasn't bothered about being seen nude or her being nude.

ThatBloodyWoman · 27/02/2014 22:58

I'd like to dreadlock mine.

I would like to grow my pit hair this Summer.

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