To insist visiting children eat their sausages?

[gruffalosmile]

Have two of DD's friends over this afternoon, their Mum is working tonight so I have done them tea, they asked for sausages chips and beans which I provided (early tea as they are being picked up soon). One got down from the table without asking, the other is still there but neither ate their (good quality) sausages. They cost me 3 quid, I am a bit cross. I have asked them to come back to the table and eat their sausages (I won't insist they eat all of them, I just want a token effort). They looked at me like I was some sort of harridan. AIBU??

I would end insist visiting children set all their dinner, but mine have to at least eat a good portion of it

What's making me laugh most about this is the 'but maybe the sausages tasted funny!' I mean...what? So once a child has tasted a type of food, they can never be offered a different brand of the same thing?

OP YANBU. I was a fussy pita as a kid but friends' mums didn't pander to me, and I still liked going over to theirs. I would never have discovered my deep and abiding love for toad in the hole if my friend's mum hadn't told me to 'come on, just eat up!'

I would not, I meant but I would be secretly pissed off they did not make an effort after asking for that particular meal

whatever'I don't think it's about teaching good manners. But if you had a play date round and they said 'oi, dc mum, I want a drink' would you just make it because it's not your place to teach manners? I won't allow other children to treat me like a Mug in my own home - I've been there as was accused of being too strict - which in fact just meant the mum expected me to allow her children to treat my home as they wanted. (And then did similar to childminders etc).

I wouldn't have expected the children to eat the sausages if full (tho don't think the op is BU) but would have expected them to at least wait at table while others finished or if they wanted to get down have the decency to ask.

6 pages!

I can understand that you are annoyed but I don't think I'd make them eat what they didn't want. Give them something cheap next time. Greggs sausage roll Don't know if they are even cheap now though. Haven't had one for years.

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it's a hide the sausage game isnt it ... dice it and disguise it as stuff in beans

Actually am laughing now at people saying they don't allow children to damage stuff, treat stuff badly but don't feel it's their ace to teach good manners. Surely it is good manners to teach children to respect others property

curious

Of xourse they can be offered a different brand. But they dont have to like it. Theres nothing wrong with liking one version if somethinh but disliking another.

Yes OP, it's your fault for buying good quality sausages with all meat content and no shite ingredients who'd want them?

Honestly, the things we can be blamed for.

Example- i like beans. I like Heinz beans. My mum gave me Heinz beans for years, then they brought out some stupid bloody plastic pot thing and they were fucking vile. Same brand, same beans, extra plastic taste. Yuck.

I have solved it. They asked for sausage, chips and beans OP?

But did they ask for it in that way OR did they ask for chips with beans and sausages hmmmm.....?

I think they wanted beans with little sausages in.

Not your scary big three quid sausage. They were probably scared of it and thought all the nice likkle sausages you find in beans had joined together to form one giant sausage of doom.

I'm like a detective. Sort of.

YANBU....if my children were refusing to eat at someone else's house, I would want the person looking after them to try to get them to eat something.

@ dawn!

youarewinning- yes I would make them a drink even if they asked for it quite rudely. I would doubt that I would have them around again though (my children would let them know why).

Putting the forcefeeding debate aside for a moment if your own DCs do have table manners and ask to get down from the table when they have finished and wait for everyone to finish eating then why should they have to see their friends do as they please and just come and go at the table as they please?

If you went out for dinner with friends would you not think it odd if they just got up after their last mouthful and stood drinking at the bar? It's a basic social norm isn't it to respect your company and especially host that has taken the trouble to cook for you even if you dont like what they serve???

Follow this onto meal times at school imagine if 150 kids all thought they could just get up and wonder off from the table whenever they fancied it would be bedlum!

Also, £3 is a tenth of my food budget for the week. I'd be gutted if I'd wasted it on nice sausages that didn't get eaten.

Actually am laughing now at people saying they don't allow children to damage stuff, treat stuff badly but don't feel it's their ace to teach good manners. Surely it is good manners to teach children to respect others property

Err no. It's not good manners to teach other people's children to respect property.

If £3 was a tenth of my weekly food budget I probably wouldn't agree to having two friends round for tea though...

I don't think UABU at all as long as you said it in a friendly enough manner.

They asked for them they can at least try them, if they then don't like them fair enough. This is the rule I apply to my DS, 8/10 he then rubs his tummy and goes 'mmm' after trying it. I'm not going to force him to eat anything he doesn't want to, I at least want him to try it though.

I agree. Visiting children have to follow the same rules as your own.

DS is three and has to ask to leave the table. He's done so for almost 6 months. He waits til we're finished til he can leave. He also had to make a reasonable attempt at tea. No tea, no dessert.

If he goes to someone else's house and they don't have these standards it's up to them. At my house they follow the status quo in absence of their parents.

Ah I get you now whatever5 I was thinking you meant you'd just allow it for a great play date

I guess I look at things differently - my ds has SN and the social side of things is somewhat delayed. He sometimes often needs reminding of what to do and so I'm happy for people to guide him. He tends to copy his peers behaviour but magnifies it ten fold.

£3 is about a tenth of my food budget and it doesnt go on expensive sausages. If £30 is all you have you spend it more wisely than that.