to think my sister was a bit insensitive Re Holiday

[NachoAddict]

Dp was made redundant towards the end of last year. We had booked a holiday prior to this but not paid the full balance. Dp is still out of work, the balance needs paying next week so we have decided we will have to cancel it. We will loose the 800 non refundable deposit.

My sister rang me after hearing about it and asked if they can pay the outstanding balance and have the holiday.

So am I being UR to think she is being a bit insensitive cheeky or is she being wise since we will be losing the money anyway?

[SanityClause]

It's a whole different situation hare, if the OP had suggested it to her sister, rather than the other way round.

And I would still think, even if the OP had offered to her sister, that the sister should make good the £800, rather than benefitting from her sister's misfortune.

[ivykaty44]

I hope you are able to change your booking and get away on a cheaper deal

But if that happens you will have your sister to thank for being cheeky and then you posting here about it

[Joiningthegang]

I agree with hopping and darling - I would rather someone else benefits rather than an outright loss to the holiday company.

Good luck in changing your booking though

[Joiningthegang]

Japanese - they are 800 down in any case, that's why it is dead money - already gone, never to be seen again

Am I the only one wondering how much the balance is?

[Trumpton]

Balance is £1600 the info is ^^ . Good luck with ringing them today.

[Trumpton]

Ooh where did my little up-thread arrows go ?

[strawberryswing]

Yanbu!

I sincerely hope that you manage to defer your holiday or get a cheaper one another time.

I echo what has been said before. If it comes down to it you should say your sister she can have the holiday if she fronts half the deposit then win win. If she doesn't want to then I'm sorry, although petty, I'd rather lose the money than someone have a cheaper holiday at my expense.

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

I'm pretty sure you can just defer the holiday....my friend and her DH had a holiday booked and then split up......so they deferred it for a year just in case they got back together!

[DoJo]

OP - I hope you are on the phone right now with a big grin on your face because you're deferring or booking an alternative! Fingers crossed...

[BaileysOnRocks]

If it was my sister I would of course said yes! You're losing it anyway - so wouldn't you rather she and her family enjoyed a holiday?
Not 'if I can't have it, no one can'
I know it's upsetting as it should be your holiday but it is your sister

[Topaz25]

It simply wouldn't occur to me to try and profit from a loved one's misfortune in this way so I think she is being unreasonable and cheeky and grabby. It would be different if you'd offered her the holiday because you are going to lose it anyway or if she had offered to pay part of your deposit.

[Creamycoolerwithcream]

Nacho, have you had any luck changing the holiday?

[DeWe]

For me it would depend on any history of similar things.
If my dsis phoned up and asked, I would love to say yes to her. I'd much rather someone I know benefitted-even if she was asking for a friend, I;d still rather some positive came out of it. If I'm not getting the deposit back, it's no loss to me, and a gain to someone else.
I probably would even offer round my friends.

However if someone else I knew phoned and asked, then I'd fume because they have a history of being entitled and grabby. Things like a phone call "dc has taken his first step, so we need stairgates, can you bring (1hr drive) yours over now for us?" No, we still use them, we hadn't offered at any point themand I'll find someone more deserving. So I wouldn't to them, which sounds petty, but give an inch take a mile comes to mind, so I guard those inches too.

[Jess03]

But to not have said something like, we cold not afford to pay you all the 800 but we could pay x? Personally is have a low view of her character if she is just purely expecting to profit from your misfortune with nothing in it for you except the warm glow you get from thinking of her having a holiday....hope you could defer it!

[Bogeyface]

I think the difference is that she asked instead of it being offered, and didnt mention paying the OP anything to make up for losing the deposit.

Had the OP offered it then that would be entirely different, but it seems that the sister jumped on the chance to get a cheap holiday without considering how the OP would feel about this vulture like behaviour.

I hope it was simply thoughtlessness that would embarrass her when pointed out, but I rather suspect not.

[SlightlyDampWellies]

oooh! marking for update- I hope so much you can defer it and have a great holiday!

[K8Middleton]

[innisglas]

YABU I would much rather my sister or a friend got the benefit of my 800 pounds than complete strangers.

I don't see anything wrong or pushy about asking

[jendot]

Any luck op?

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

I think gaining out of a close family's misfortune is pretty low to be honest. Yes by all means ask if you can go in their place but for god sake, offer to pay what they have already forked out for....why wouldn't you?

[GhoulWithADragonTattoo]

I think OP's sister is behaving in a practical way and I'd prefer to see family take the holiday than lose the money. I do think she should have offered to pay half the deposit as well. I hope OP has managed to transfer the money to a different holiday for her family though as this would be best result :)

[Impatientismymiddlename]

I would just be glad that a relative will benefit from the deposit rather than lose it to the travel companies coffers.

[shewhowines]

If I was paying full price then I'd want to pick exactly what I want. There is certain sense in dsis asking for it, so not to waste it, but she should really offer to compensate op in some way- but not the full £800.

[gobbynorthernbird]

Maybe the sister only has a £1600 budget? It's all well and good saying she must pay the whole deposit, but what if she can't? If this were me (and no possibilty of deferring) I'd have offered it to family/friends the second I realised I couldn't go.

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

Well if she can't afford it she shouldn't bloody go - the same reason that the OP can't go!

If I phoned and offered it to my sister then fair enough but if she had the cheek to ring and ask.....and esp not offer to pay what OP had already paid......my opinion of her would really lower.