To think that 3 teachers shouldn't have done this to my son?

[Marn1e]

My DS is 7 and in year 2. He's been swimming with the school every week for the past two terms and enjoys it a lot.

Last week he had a flare up of his eczema. For background, he's suffered since he was 3 months old and has been involved in clinical trials/ all sorts of treatments etc. I now generally just keep him moisturised etc and only use his 10% steroid cream when need be. Last week he was covered so I immediately used his cream and gave him anti histamine etc.

It coincided with swimming so I popped into the office on the relevant morning and told them he'd had a flare up of eczema and I was going to keep him off swimming for two weeks ( necessary because the steroid immediately gets to work but further applications are needed even when the patches are gone to continue "dampening' it all down.

Today was the second week so I didn't send him in with his kit. He's still covered but on the mend so he will be back to it next week.

He came out of school today and told me that a teaching assistant had approached him and asked him why he wasn't swimming. He told her he had eczema. She then called over another teacher and a helper and between them they asked him to pull up his trousers so they could see his legs and then asked him to pull up his tops so they could look at his chest, tummy and back. He did this but was obviously a bit bothered as it was the first thing he said to me when he came out of school.

I called the school and the relevant teachers had gone home, although the teacher I spoke to said there would have been a very good reason why they did this and he " probably said his skin was hurting so they had a look".

He didn't say this. He has never once complained about it and he's never had time off school for it. Besides, he told me he was approached by a TA who specifically asked to look at it.

I've asked the school to come back to me with an explanation. They obviously don't believe me ( err not sure why?!?! ) but instead of calling me they chose for three of them to get him to pull up his clothes.

So is this a big deal? Wwyd?

In the absence of any written information, or passed on messages they should have either contacted home immediately or allowed him to sit out of the swimming session and checked with the OP later.

Some stunning posts on this thread.

'My child was uncomfortable after being asked to expose himself to 3 members of staff' (and who can blame him) response no he wasn't children aren't uncomfortable about showing a bit of leg

several posters reiterate that teachers/ta's/helpers should never ever do this, how its completely against the rules and explain the reasons why it could put a child at increased risk. response
it doesn't matter what they do it might save a child from being abused.

NO NO don't you get it, it wont? its not ok for teachers to ignore the rules put there to protect children.

I know, theres no huge harm done and yet they have ignored this fundamental rule, I think a bit of training wouldn't go amiss (as a minimum).

That's what they should have done.
But many parents get angry if the school phone home about their children feeling ill, or not wanting to do something and saying their mum told them they didn't have to. So if they thought he just didn't want to get cold and wet, they might have firmly jollied him along.
Then, as others have said happens with their own children, if the swimming had had no effect, or a beneficial effect, they might have thought it was fine.
Point being it's up to parents to notify school of medical needs, and up to the staff to follow set guidelines. Otherwise everyone makes up the rules based on gut feelings, judgement calls and the whole thing goes to pot.

When I was 7 would I have cared? No. I'm a kid. He was just confused following the pants rule chat.

I don't go swimming at work so they don't normally see my legs or belly so completely different scenario.

Storm in a teacup.

Mothra it doesn't matter whether other parents get angry or whether the staff thought he should be swimming. If a child says their mother has told them they are not to swim you don't examine the child yourself to determine whether you agree and you don't make them swim without checking with the parent.

If he had been lying and missed a session he should have done, there are appropriate behaviour management procedures they could use to deal with it.

Not getting any argument from me Goldmandra, It's why I still have a job after all these years, and why I put up with parents shrieking at me, either face to face or down the phone.
Follow procedure, get written records of everything and don't improvise.

An abused kid might care VERY MUCH btw.

Lots of people with an "I'm alright Jack" attitude on here. These rules are protect vulnerable children.

If the rules were to be skipped because "common sense" would be more likely to reveal problems, there would be a large number of holes where "common sense" wasn't quite sensible enough to look in to.

Perhaps all those posters who disagree with current child protection/safeguarding procedures should contact their local safeguarding children boards and offer to come and help them review their practice?

Parents get cross when the rules inconvenience them.
In several schools I've worked in, you can't help children tie up their hair, take their earrings out or put them in, give them medication even if the parent asks you to, let them be collected by someone you don't know without advance notification, that sort of low-level stuff.
It still comes under safeguarding.

I am being told that my son approached the teacher and said his eczema was painful and would they look at it for him.

OP, thinking back to the above explanation from the head, it would be interesting to ask what the staff had concluded after their inspection of your son's eczema. They didn't contact you to say that your son had been in pain, so did they decide, after looking, that he wasn't in pain? (which would all sound ludicrous, because they wouldn't have been been qualified/in a position to know).

Clearly, their story does not hold water - if they had been responding to your son's request for help, you would have been notified in some way.

Hmmm - fascicle has a point.

So they have a child in pain. They had a look and saw fairly severe looking eczema. And then they did what?

Confirm if he had any cream in school? Attempt to contact you to see what can be done? Attempt to contact his doctor? Check regularly throughout the day how it was feeling. Ensure you knew about it immediately on pick up?

Or just let a child be in pain and do nothing?

Nevermind about safeguarding - what about basic human decency?

I know he didn't ask them to look at his eczema. that didn't happen. it happened as he told.me

But you don't actually know that do you.It might be what you believe but that isn't the same as believing.

should hace read
'But you don't actually know that do you.It might be what you believe but that isn't the same as knowing.

As for the "they couldn't possibly suspect me of child abuse because of my job" comment by OP, I suspect that is what priests used to say.

Not that I think this was about child abuse but OP is being ridiculous to imagine that anyone is immune from being a possible suspect just because of their job/ seniority. Thank goodness that mentality has now gone. Ditto domestic abuse.

Yes, Profplum, but that is besides the point as they didn't follow safeguarding procedures anyway.

YANBU
They shouldn't have done that.
It was clumsy and inappropriate.

YANBU. I am a teacher and the only time we ask a child to do this is to check an injury.

fifi669 I am amazed at your inability to recognize the possibility that not everyone feels and thinks the same way that you do. What an absurd idea that it's impossible for any child to feel uncomfortable showing their body to someone. As it happens, my ds went through a phase (from age 8-10) of being extremely embarrassed to show his chest to anyone. We live in Los Angeles so are surrounded by bare chested beach goers, but my ds would always wear a rash guard or t-shirt at the beach. He would have been mortified if a teacher had asked him for any reason to show them his belly. Dd at around the same age had to be constantly stopped from running completely naked down the street (she really didn't like to wear clothes)...luckily she too has outgrown this phase.

Someone further up made a very good point. In general, I think that one should try to offer children the same respect you would give to the adults around you.

Your OP has raised my anxiety levels! I would be spitting feathers if they did this to my son.

I wouldn't see it in an abuse type of way but that they didn't believe him and took it upon themselves to make sure. They have no right to do that! Just because he's a child, that's what pisses me off that they think that it's acceptable because he's a child. You wouldn't do that to an adult. They should've contacted you. I would be beyond livid.

My son is only a year old but I get the impression I may be a nightmare parent when he goes to school...