To ask my husband to stop farting?

[WhatWouldCaitlinDo]

Seriously, it's toxic. Yesterday, he was dressing DC, aged 18 months. He let a ripper go - the strong, silent type. The poor child burst into tears, pointed at her nose and flapped her arms around in total distress.

Can anyone recommend any remedies? A cork up his bottom? Nose pegs for all the famiyl? Cutting out meat, beans, dairy, alcohol, gluten and sugar, so he survives purely on fruit, vegetables and oxygen?!

Help help help.

[maras2]

ZOMBIE 6 month old thread.

[Showy]

Resurrecting threads about flatulence. Yup, just a normal guy.

[Joolsali]

Use a candle to burn off the methane. Obs not when kids are around. The naked flame burns off the methane hence no smell.

[Berryglitter]

My farts are hideous but I honestly could not hold it in, I get a one second warning of complete gut agony. If I held it in (and I have tried) the pain can cause me to have to bend forward... Therefore farts come out. I don't know if that's normal but I cannot help it, where ever I am.

[TheFirstOfHerName]

We are a family that feels free to be flatulent in each others company. None of them really smell terrible apart from DH's Crohn's farts, which have literally brought tears to my eyes.

[Runesigil]

I've leaped in here at page 7 without reading any replies because I have a solution that someone may not have already mentioned although considering everything I post on MN seems to crosspost I'm not so sure

I started a low carb diet and decided it was easier if the family low carbed along with me so for a week I removed as much sugar as possible as well as rice, pasta, potatoes and flour from the family's diet. It took a bit of forward planning but I managed it. We were all astounded that after a few days, flatulence was no longer occurring for anyone.

Whilst I've stuck with the no white fluffy carbs for quite a while, the family do want some now and again but it's patently obvious that shortly after a carby meal, the after-effects are apparent.

Going to read the rest of the thread now.

[Flipflops7]

Had to train DH to go to the correct room. Grim.

[CrohnicallyExhausted]

Ah yes, Crohn's farts. Mine can bring tears to my eyes!

[mumwhatnothing]

My Darling Brother is a serial malicious farter. I was driving him from Townsville to Cairns last year. We were in the front while his wife and children were in the back. The aircon was on full blast as it was 36 degrees and blowing straight into the back. EVERY 5 minutes SIL would yell and whack her husband for farting and letting it waft directly into her face. He is evil and I'm sure he was in danger of shitting himself just to gross her out.

My husband NEVER used to fart because his parents would get furious if he burped or farted.....then he met me. He now farts in DDs face and he and DS fart at each other all the time. I fart a lot. Not always stinky but often and I find them hilarious (except when I am sick and can't help the smell or the fact they really do leak out when I least expect it). He has been away now for 5 months and I have cut out a lot of white bread etc and have noticed a reduction in botty burps. Maybe when he gets back next week I will go to Hungry Jacks and have a burger on white bun just to make him feel at home.

[xvxvxvxvxvxvxvxv]

Actually jealous of furrydogmother as I wish I could vomit on someone's shoes after they farted.

[whois]

Wow can't believe how many people think it's ok to let rip a stinker in front of other people.

You wouldn't do it at work so why do it at home? Takes 2 seconds to nip to the bathroom or at least out of the room and do it there.

[WanderingTrolley1]

My DP makes a production out of his farting: "I almost ripped myself another arsehole!"

I find it gross, but don't give him a reaction, just inwardly rage.

[OHforDUCKScake]

mummynothing loved that post. Made me larf.

[ROUNDandROUNDINCIRCILESMORETHA]

This is hillarious :)

[UncleT]

Some bastard near me kept repeatedly farting on the plane the other day. The worst thing is that there is simply no escape - it's rank.

[okeydonkey]

I've just abandoned our cosy night on sofa bed as he keeps farting and its so gross I feel like its in my mouth

[TheFirstOfHerName]

Yes, but farting is perennial, so worth resurrecting.

[SistersOfPercy]

I like to sleep with my feet out of the bed so I sleep half way down it (short arse) sadly, this brings me level with dh's toxic arse.
It's not enough that he sounds like an angry pig but some night's he smells like one too. He's woken me up many times with a fart that could stun an elephant and I've actually had to stick my head out of the window to stop myself from heaving.

Fortunately he's pretty respectful and if he does have gut rot he will sleep in the spare room.

[He11y]

m.theweek.com/speedreads/index/264585/speedreads-study-smelling-farts-is-good-for-your-health
It's good for you! :-D

[emms1981]

My dear nan did a fart once and in a serious voice said I have had 6 children you know.
I have 2 so I'm working up to having an excuse

[bubalou]

I haven't read all the replies but I could have written that post myself OP!

I understand him farting - what I don't understand is waiting until we get in the car and then trapping me inside with it!

Men hey!

[MrWalletwithMothsonboard]

I once had a partner who would talk so openly about his toilet habits, how many times he had been that day and texture etc. In addition to burping, belching and very very long and noisy farts (which I admit could sometimes raise a laugh), he would comment on what he had eaten each time.

So it would be, oh that was the bacon sandwich, egg roll, sausages etc.
In the end this would all go through my mind when we were in bed and I just went off him in the end. He would also fart during and after sex.

While I understand it is natural to have wind, I just could not fancy him due to the descriptions of it all!

[NellyNoodle1]

I have IBS and I don't use that as an excuse to let rip whenever I want. My mum has colitis and has had most of her bowel removed but doesn't although she often has to rush out to the loo.

We never did it in front of each other as a family when I was growing up - it was considered bad manners unless someone was unwell. I hate being around families and people who find it acceptable - and who is anyone to tell me I haven't the right to be offended. I can't think of anything more mortifying than doing it in front of work colleagues.

It about being respectful to others and having some respect for yourself.

It's complete BS about not being able to stifle it - what about in job interviews, in restaurants etc would you all happily let rip then?

[MrsMook]

After DS2s birth which involved a month of laxitives and a lot of damage down below, including rather stunned nerve endings, I had no idea that I'd been releasing silent but deadlies until after the event. Taking strong probiotics made a big difference at restoring the natural balance that the laxitives had sripped away, which really helped to calm the odour. Pelvic floor exercises, and time to heal solved the other half of the problem.

I've noticed recently that sugar has a negative effect down there. My body is quite sensitive to changes in diet,