To ask my husband to stop farting?

[WhatWouldCaitlinDo]

Seriously, it's toxic. Yesterday, he was dressing DC, aged 18 months. He let a ripper go - the strong, silent type. The poor child burst into tears, pointed at her nose and flapped her arms around in total distress.

Can anyone recommend any remedies? A cork up his bottom? Nose pegs for all the famiyl? Cutting out meat, beans, dairy, alcohol, gluten and sugar, so he survives purely on fruit, vegetables and oxygen?!

Help help help.

[AloysiusBear]

Schools definitely won't tolerate children leaving the classroom every time they need to pass wind, there are also many, many jobs where you can't leave your post every time either.

Needing to do it excessively & with particularly foul smell to me indicates poor diet & should be easily addressed.

[Chloefairydust]

@Freyathecatt

Recently instituted a fart jar in our house. If he lets off a ripper in my presence he has to pay the fart jar a shiny £1 (as do i if i reciprocate). I reckon we'll be able to go on a stonking holiday come year end.

Just reading through this thread and the first sentence in this comment made me laugh… I thought you were going to say you get your DH to fart in the jar 🤣… @Freyathecatt

And my partner farts all the time, it’s funny but I hate it when it smells. The worst thing is when he farts in bed, complete turn off. 🤢 … I’m thinking of buying some of those boxers that filter fart smells for him to wear in bed, but they are expensive, and I don’t know if they work? Or how long they work for? 🤔

[Sunnytwobridges]

This. Smelly farts are sickening as I have a weak stomach. Letting one go every once in a while is fine but constantly doing it in the same space as everyone else is gross. My ex was like that and it was such a huge turn off. I always leave the room as I think it’s rude to constantly fart in front of others- no one wants to smell that shit all the time lol

[Didjesuspoop]

@OhSunnyMorning why have you resurrected an 8 year old thread just to say ‘fart’???

[Sparklesocks]

🧟🧟🧟🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️

[Topseyt123]

@AndyWarholsBanana

When I was about 5, I asked my devout Christian DM if Jesus did windy pops (her terminology). She got really angry and I still remember being baffled about what I'd done wrong.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I just love that! 🤣 If Jesus was human and ate food like the rest of us then he must have shat, piddled, puked and farted just like the rest of us. I guess there is nothing in the Bible discussing this delicate and refined subject though. 🤔🤣

This thread is hilarious. In my parents' house when we were growing up there were farting competitions. Except when the Queen was visiting, of course. DH's parents' house was the total opposite and you had to virtually pretend you didn't even have a bum. I have trained him better now. 🤣

We happily fart around our house, and I come out somewhat ahead of DH and DD.

[DoodlePug]

My farts and even poo barely smell at all.

DH and I eat pretty much the same except he eats red meat a few times a week, drinks coffee and beer and his stink so it's one of those that does it!

Or maybe it's just down to gut bacteria, which would be much more difficult to solve.

[asblindasabat]

…. and my DS!

[asblindasabat]

My dh is the same!

[LumpyandBumps]

ZOMBIE

[Orders76]

Unfortunately it's a real problem male or female. We joke that DH will soon be on a prison diet of bread and water as everything now makes him fart.
Just ask him to cut down on the big triggers and fart outside as much as possible, maybe get a dog for his exercise and outdoor relief. Not joking, moving vigorously outdoors may lead to less indoors. Cut down on sugar, not great for IBS.

[MrsMook]

After DS2s birth which involved a month of laxitives and a lot of damage down below, including rather stunned nerve endings, I had no idea that I'd been releasing silent but deadlies until after the event. Taking strong probiotics made a big difference at restoring the natural balance that the laxitives had sripped away, which really helped to calm the odour. Pelvic floor exercises, and time to heal solved the other half of the problem.

I've noticed recently that sugar has a negative effect down there. My body is quite sensitive to changes in diet,

[NellyNoodle1]

I have IBS and I don't use that as an excuse to let rip whenever I want. My mum has colitis and has had most of her bowel removed but doesn't although she often has to rush out to the loo.

We never did it in front of each other as a family when I was growing up - it was considered bad manners unless someone was unwell. I hate being around families and people who find it acceptable - and who is anyone to tell me I haven't the right to be offended. I can't think of anything more mortifying than doing it in front of work colleagues.

It about being respectful to others and having some respect for yourself.

It's complete BS about not being able to stifle it - what about in job interviews, in restaurants etc would you all happily let rip then?

[MrWalletwithMothsonboard]

I once had a partner who would talk so openly about his toilet habits, how many times he had been that day and texture etc. In addition to burping, belching and very very long and noisy farts (which I admit could sometimes raise a laugh), he would comment on what he had eaten each time.

So it would be, oh that was the bacon sandwich, egg roll, sausages etc.
In the end this would all go through my mind when we were in bed and I just went off him in the end. He would also fart during and after sex.

While I understand it is natural to have wind, I just could not fancy him due to the descriptions of it all!

[bubalou]

I haven't read all the replies but I could have written that post myself OP!

I understand him farting - what I don't understand is waiting until we get in the car and then trapping me inside with it!

Men hey!

[emms1981]

My dear nan did a fart once and in a serious voice said I have had 6 children you know.
I have 2 so I'm working up to having an excuse

[He11y]

m.theweek.com/speedreads/index/264585/speedreads-study-smelling-farts-is-good-for-your-health
It's good for you! :-D

[SistersOfPercy]

I like to sleep with my feet out of the bed so I sleep half way down it (short arse) sadly, this brings me level with dh's toxic arse.
It's not enough that he sounds like an angry pig but some night's he smells like one too. He's woken me up many times with a fart that could stun an elephant and I've actually had to stick my head out of the window to stop myself from heaving.

Fortunately he's pretty respectful and if he does have gut rot he will sleep in the spare room.

[TheFirstOfHerName]

Yes, but farting is perennial, so worth resurrecting.

[okeydonkey]

I've just abandoned our cosy night on sofa bed as he keeps farting and its so gross I feel like its in my mouth

[UncleT]

Some bastard near me kept repeatedly farting on the plane the other day. The worst thing is that there is simply no escape - it's rank.

[ROUNDandROUNDINCIRCILESMORETHA]

This is hillarious :)

[OHforDUCKScake]

mummynothing loved that post. Made me larf.