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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to want to try coke just once?

532 replies

CentreParting · 20/01/2014 22:37

I'm nearing a significant and have a bit of a bucket list.
This is one thing that I'm considering.
Sourcing it shouldn't be a problem.
I've tried softer drugs in my midtwenties, but am now just got a yearning to give it a go in a very controlled environment. But and a little bit concerned about the aftermath.
AIBU to be thinking like this?

OP posts:
thepobblewhohasnotoes · 24/01/2014 12:47

Maryz I've just seen your post. I'm so sorry for your son's loss.

Do you mind if I can ask what he was taking and how he died? I'm asking as I hope that maybe that information might help someone else.

HelloBoys · 24/01/2014 13:36

MrsPMT that's fascinating. I think I may have had psychosis too, care to share your experiences? Smile

Skunk and weed are well known for psychosis and I never smoked any of that. had some hash brownies twice.

brother's ex who smoked lots of weed and she said it made her a bit psychotic.

SomethingOnce · 24/01/2014 14:01

I often wonder during these sort of discussions, why people don't take as dim a view of those who engage in riskier sports and fuck themselves up (horseriding like Christopher Reeve, or skiing, like Schumacher).

I mean, there is no need to do either, no practical purpose; it's purely for kicks. But it's a tragedy when the worst happens. I'm not saying it's not tragic, I'm just puzzled why there's a moral difference.

I say this as a childhood horseriding obsessive who wouldn't mind another crack of the whip, but who can't justify the small but unnecessary risk as a parent.

ProfessorDent · 24/01/2014 15:37

Fair point from SomethingOnce. It could be that drugs are trad for young 'uns, so you have that whole 'life ahead of them' thing. And that they are coerced into it by propaganda, and their own youth.

But there is also the idea whether true or not that drugs are all so blissed out, there is some Protestant work ethic disapproval going on.

expatinscotland · 24/01/2014 16:44

'I'm not saying it's not tragic, I'm just puzzled why there's a moral difference.'

Because coke is covered in blood when it's sold.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 24/01/2014 17:07

expat I don't think that is true, because people still hang-wring about other people taking drugs, even when it's not a drug associated with blood money in the way coke is, and when they're unaware of those kind of issues.

expatinscotland · 24/01/2014 17:11

You don't think coke and its production is covered in blood? Really?

honeybunny14 · 24/01/2014 17:14

Yabu i dont agree with parents taking class A drugs because anything could happen i wouldnt do it but your body your choice

SomethingOnce · 25/01/2014 00:56

expat, I was setting aside the ethical issues associated with much of the drug supply in order to focus on the risk issue. I said earlier I agree that coke is by far the least ethical drug there is. You've made your point about that.

pobble is quite right, people will handwring about people risking 'doing drugs' even when it's handpicked mushrooms or homegrown weed.

SelectAUserName · 25/01/2014 06:51

It is true that the majority of social drug users will not become addicts who wreck their entire lives. The cultural landscape has changed so that there is now a couple of generations able to talk comparatively openly and from a position of personal experience about the reality of drug-taking, how it affected them or didn't affect them physically and mentally, what they see as the pros and cons, while living normal, non-drug-fuelled lives. I wouldn't want to negate their experiences or assume they're all stupid idiots, and I fully support decriminalisation and regulation of recreational drugs, along with research into potential long-term effects which is currently patchy to say the least.

For me personally though, I could never take drugs because of the horror and suffering the illegal trade causes. I can't close my mind to that or compartmentalise the "me having a (probable) good time thanks to an added illegal buzz" from the "innocent people have died / children have been orphaned to get this non-essential substance into my hands" reality.

I think any discussion about drugs with children/teenagers should include both sides - alongside the information about the wider repercussions of the trade and the risks (physical, mental and societal) and the inability to predict who will be fine and who will react adversely, there has to be an acknowledgement that drugs can make some people feel great and that the probability is most people will be fine afterwards apart from some temporary unpleasant side effects because that is the truth and to hide those facts undermines the whole debate. Only then can they make an informed choice.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 11:06

expatinscotland you misunderstood my post, sorry if I was not clear.

Of course coke and its production is covered in blood. I was saying that that's not the morality issue that ProfessorDent is talking about.

I pointed out that many people act as if drugs are immoral, even when the drug (other drugs, NOT coke) are produced without harm to other people. Or also when they are totally unaware of such issues.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 11:10

honeybunny how do you feel about parents skydiving? Mountain climbing? Driving?

Should parents not engage in any kind of risky activity? Where do you draw the line?

If a drug had been proved to be as safe as - say - swimming in a swimming pool, would you be OK with people taking it?

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/01/2014 13:37

does skydiving or driving affect your brain then?

sobbingmummy · 25/01/2014 14:30

Can I just ask if any of you would do a line of coke with your son or daughter once they are over the age of 18?

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 14:51

No I wouldn't do a line of c

sobbingmummy · 25/01/2014 14:52

Sorry I should have addressed it to the ladies that think doing coke is okay.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 14:54

No I wouldn't do a line of coke with my DCs, same as I wouldn't get really drink of front of them. Does not mean I wouldn't do those things with my friends present, but I don't feel it's appropriate to do when i'm in parent mode.

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/01/2014 15:02

would you enjoy a glass of wine with your dcs once they are old enough?

sobbingmummy · 25/01/2014 15:02

Most people have said that drugs are safer than alcohol, smoking and extreme sports so I wondered how (drug taking)parents would feel about having a line of coke with their child seeing as its so safe.

sobbingmummy · 25/01/2014 15:02

would you enjoy a glass of wine with your dcs once they are old enough?

Yes of course.

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/01/2014 15:03

post was to pobbles.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 17:06

Yes Vampyre, I absolutely would drink a glass of wine with my adult child, but I wouldn't get fall-down drunk in front of them.

To me, getting drunk and taking drugs are something people do with peers. That may well be the culture and social habits surrounding the way I am used to taking them, as much as any moral judgement however.

If we lived in a society where drugs were more in the open, who knows?

I also think I feel uncomfortable with coke specifically because of the very addictive nature of it. I personally wouldn't feel comfortable doing it in the same way I wouldn't feel comfortable smoking a cigarette with my child, I really wouldn't want to encourage them to do something so potentially destructive.

I suppose however it's also partly to do with the social situation. I could imagine, at a stretch, taking a line of coke if i was with my adult child, if we were doing something totally out of the ordinary like trekking up a mountain in South America for example, perhaps. I don't know. (In RL, I have chewed cocoa leaves while trekking up a mountain in South America in RL. They didn't make me high, they just took away my fatigue and appetite, which is what they've been traditionally taken for for centuries).

But certainly not coke in a social situation.

For other drugs, it would depend on the drug. Ones which make you totally out of it, no. Ones which have a mild effect, and are not addictive, then possibly.

FWIW I do know people in their 30s whose own parents are creative types (ex hippies) and on odd occasions (like festivals) take drugs with them / in front of them. It doesn't seem too weird once you're used to it, more just a little eccentric. I've not got a problem with it. (We're talking psychedelics and hash/weed mainly, not coke).

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/01/2014 17:07

at least you acknowledge that a glass of wine is very different from one line of coke.

thepobblewhohasnotoes · 25/01/2014 17:20

Of course I do.

The way I see it, the classification of drugs into illegal and legal is relatively arbitrary, as it's based on historical and political reasons rather than evidence. (e.g. MDMA is relatively safe, no solid health reason for it to be banned IMO. I believe its banning was driven by political reasons).

I think lumping all drugs into "illegal and therefore bad" is naive.

Each substance (legal or illegal) should be treated differently according to its effects, addictiveness, production methods, etc IMO.

We should also question why they are illegal and what purpose it serves to keen them illegal; is it helping society to have such powerful substances controlled by criminals rather than official agencies? I don't think so personally.

Commander6 · 25/01/2014 20:31

Is anyone actually saying that taking drugs are a good thing?

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