To not understand why ex is taking paternity leave?

[marleyandme2014]

Split with my ex shortly after finding out I was pregnant.

Not had much to do with him during the pregnancy - not once had him ask me if I needed anything for the baby etc which I feel is a bit off - however all of a sudden he is contacting me asking for my mat b1 form so that he can claim paternity leave!

I thought this was for fathers who would be spending their time with the newborn - not in this case though - he said quite blatantly that he wants to use the time to catch up with friends and buy a car.

So as not to drip feed, I am with my long term partner again now - pregnancy with ex not planned of course but me and my partner are very happy and he will be fully involved in her care and upbringing. We will be getting married in the summer.

AIBU in thinking he is unreasonable, or is this OK?

Gosh what a nightmare.

So far he's not been very nice, shows no interest in providing financially or being involved. He seems only to be interested in a free holiday.

If naming him on a birth certificate gives him power over you then do not name him. If he mends his ways he can be given PR at a Later date. Just protect yourself and your baby until he grows up.

I think you need to stop being drawn into conversations with him about things that are so negative. A simple no, your not having any form as you won't be looking after us. Sorry.

You have a long road ahead with this man and It's not worth the stress, let him come forward if he wants contact.

Get some legal advice, OP.

Or, at the very least, google government websites etc to find out about PR, etc.

Or post in legal matters. You really do need some good advice, and not as much judginess.

Do not name him on the birth certificate. Get legal advice.

This man is a leech, and that's a risk to your child, who is NOT a toy to be manipulated.

TBF it does look like the OP is trying to shut the father out

Only if you make up stuff and use it to fill in the blanks.

Its just a different interpretation of the thread.

I don't disagree that the Ex is all the things that the OP says that he is.
I don't disagree about not putting him on the BC.

But IMO the OP really doesn't want him in her or the babies life at all.

From what the OP posted
"if he was a decent person i would have no problem with him being on the BC.

Sadly for me and my unborn child, he's far from decent."

On the plus side, if he isn't decent he won't be around for long.

She's invited him to all the scans though and he's chosen not to attend. All he's doing is trying to fuck with her head.

Would you want someone who was like that in your child's life?

But yep it sounds like it would be likely and on the plus side

My ex asked for this.

I gladly informed him it I was not going to help him fraudulently claim paternity leave seeing as he won't be spending the time with my DC never gave it to him

I wonder how the OP is getting on. I hope she is cuddling her lovely new baby!

Hows it going Marley ?