Family member committing benefit fraud.

[Unsure2014]

I have named changed for this post - for obvious reasons. I'm not a troll, been a member for roughly 18 months.

A family member of mine is claiming as a single parent, living in private rented accommodation paid for by Housing Benefit, etc.

Her boyfriend of just over a year has just got a mortgage on a different property close by. She has moved in with both her children but is still claiming benefits as though she is still living alone at her old address. She goes back to the old house regularly (I'm not sure if it's daily) to open curtains, etc.

I don't have a problem with benefit claimants, so this is not a benefit bashing thread, I just think she is being massively out of order.

Her boyfriend earns quite a good wage and I think she is aware that if she told them her new situation all her benefits, except child benefit, would cease.

AIBU to be thinking of reporting her?

First AIBU.

morethan I don't see why it's . At the time, I worked in benefits; if I hadn't reported it and someone else had, and it was discovered that I had known about it and not reported it, I could have lost my job. Between a rock and a hard place, really. I wasn't willing to sacrifice my income for the sake of her having two holidays a year and being able to afford to keep three dogs and a horse! As it turns out, I think she closed her claim down before the investigation got going.

I agree with worra.

In addition I think family members who report other family members are doing it out of spite. It's possible she could go to jail. Rightly or wrongly I would not want to be the one that set that ball rolling.

i would report her because what she is doing is wrong, too many people are fleecing the taxpayer and getting away with it.

i also think its wrong she has a perfectly good house sitting empty - if she gave it back to the LL they could rent it out to someone else who may need it more than she does.

Yabu mind your own business , she needs to see if the relationship is stable for her dc before giving up her home.

speakly if she goes to jail she only has one person to blame - HERSELF - shes the one who commited fraud no one else.

speakly? i meant sparkly.

In the grand scheme Horsepetal you are likely right.
Would it not serve the same outcome (the benefit being saved) if the OP told family member she was a twat for claiming and she was thinking of reporting?
That would avoid a single mum getting a potential criminal record and family kids being put through the wringer.

I wouldn't report a family member I don't think but I certainly wouldn't without speaking to them/telling them I would if they didn't sort it out.

You're going to report her and then what? Support her through the fallout as a family would be expected to do knowing all the time you were the one that reported her...

I'd report it, its theft at the end of the day and theres little money already for schools etc.

Better to pay back why she owes now than months down the line.

SoonToBeSix - are you being serious?

OP are you willing to approach her and tell her you will report her if she doesn't stop? Give her a chance to do the right thing. Or will you just keep quiet to her face and do it behind her back?

Adora - it's not that she didn't have anywhere to go when she was with the ex. She kicked him out a dozen times but always took him back, not because she loved him or wanted him there for the kids but because she cannot be alone. She's admitted this to me on many occasions.

I know that she is unhappy with this man, she has been for many moons but I also know she will not leave him. So even if she was doing this as 'buffer' as to not leave herself with no where to go, I know she will do it indefinitely.

She will stay in his home, living with him, but will not feel happy and secure so will carry on keeping the other house rolling, just in case. I know her.

It's the family member breaking the law so she is guilty.
How many of us would take the decision to become the financial responsibility of a newish fella so eagerly though?
I would have to think long and hard before I depended completely on a new partner for my kids and myself.

Worra - I think your comments are extremely harsh. I can't wait to report her? Yes that's right, I'm so eager to cause her (and myself) distress that I've come to mumsnet to muse over it a little beforehand.

Sparkly, if I did report her I would tell her. I wouldn't want her accusing other family members and them getting the blame.

Why don't you tell her your going to report her?

Only you know what her partner is like and if her children will be fed the week they close down her claim.

Has she left her furniture? A home visit would find her out, if so.

I would speak to her, personally, I would never report someone behind their back, I'd tell them, especially in this situation were children related to me could be left vulnerable.

Is the children's father supporting them?

This thread haas gone so differently to a recent one were the OP was given lots if good advice about moving money around and putting property in family members names (the OP being one) to avoid paying death duties etc.

Yes you are eager

You've had every opportunity to try to talk her out of it

She trusted you because you're a family member. You said fuck all to try to prevent this and now you're talking about reporting her.

Just go ahead and do it, but do her a favour and don't leave it too long. Otherwise she'll have even more to pay back.

I'm not saying reporting her is wrong, but sitting and saying nothing to her face before she moved out, was wrong imo.

I wouldn't do it, report her that is.
If she really is doing it then the likelihood is she'll get caught out anyway sooner or later but I wouldn't be the one to cause her trouble whichever way it turns out.

As long as you tell her you're going to and give her the chance to stop then go ahead.

so she's unhappy with this man but doesn't have the sense to go back to her own home?

I feel for her children, stuck with this idiot who has an escape and won't use it.

OP, if you feel up to it, try to talk some sense into her. If she isn't happy in the relationship, she goes home. If she is, she stops stealing.

one or the other. Time for her to grow up.

Fontofnowt - I did say that to her several weeks back when she told me she was moving in with him. I explained that due to his income she would lose all her benefits and would be financially dependent on this man for her needs and the needs of her children. She nodded along and exclaimed that she hadn't thought of that.

Roll on Christmas and I go round to her house to drop her DC's gifts off. She wasn't there, I called her and she said they were at the new house. When I got there we had a chat and I asked if she had spoke to her boyfriend regarding finances etc. It was then that she told me 'well that doesn't matter anymore as I'm keeping my old house on so I will still have my money'.

I was at the time and left shortly after.

I'm not being a malicious bitch here, rubbing my hands in glee at the trouble I could cause. I haven't even decided if I should report her.

This just feels wrong to me. My mother has to leave her house due to her circumstances and the council said they will not help her at all, so she is effectively homeless. And then my family member is keeping a house empty and still claiming!

This just seems so morally wrong and it's put me in an awful position.

x posts,

but, I would talk to her first, she might have changed her mind and stopped claiming benefits.

It had not put you in an awful position at all. It doesn't directly affect you one bit.

at people who report benefit cheats as 'nosey' or 'spiteful'

Worra - if you read my latest post you will see that I haven't had plenty of chances to talk her out of it? And if I report her I should do it soon as to save her paying back more money? Are you serious? She's knowingly committing benefit fraud and I have to come off as a bitch in order to prevent her paying back more money she has stolen?