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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel that it's quite nitpicky here these days?

224 replies

SherlustHolmes · 07/01/2014 17:48

I've been a prolific poster on here for seven years under various names (Cod. Lavender. Moldies. Shitting elves. Pirates. That fucking bat.)

In the last few months I've been nipped at for so many things - posting style, choice of words, posting in the wrong place... And today I made a mistake and got pulled up quite rightly but then got pulled up again when i tried to rectify it and didn't do so exactly as one poster had suggested. Their point was valid but it kind of eclipses the issue in question.

I've always loved that Mumsnet posters don't allow inaccuracies and are quick to correct them. And I've always tried to take criticism on the chin. But it's been so frequent recently that I've committed minor infractions of unwritten rules, I feel pretty fed up and got at. In forums I've always tried to ignore or overlook errors - I suppose it's easier to ignore them than to go out of my way to correct people, and for what purpose? It feels like there are plain clothes posting police in here.

Has anyone else noticed this or have I randomly become hypersensitive?

OP posts:
BonesAndSkully · 07/01/2014 20:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ragwort · 07/01/2014 20:26

Cod - haven't seen you on here for years; surely you are the 'original' Royalty Grin - thought you had flounced.

And yes, agree it is totally nitpicky. I don't get why people post if all they are doing is nit picking. There are quite a few threads which I think are tedious beyond belief but the option is there to move on & find a more interesting thread rather than making banal comments about grammar or 'third world' type comments with the obligatory Hmm.

Mintyy · 07/01/2014 20:27

Ragwort - I don't think Cod is on the thread. Cod was mentioned as shorthand for not being a newbie.

Ragwort · 07/01/2014 20:31

Oh Blush should have realised that, what did happen to Cod?

Tweasels · 07/01/2014 20:32

People get picked apart for everything. It's awful. I've been ridiculed for using these ....... wrongly. I actually felt quite humiliated and felt I couldn't continue posting on the thread.

It's not just the spelling and grammar though it's everything. Some threads are impossible to read because 60% of the posts are from people trying to find fault with a perfectly reasonable OP.

I've said this before (and got torn apart for it) but I'll say it again. I honestly think some people thing they HAVE to be arsey/nasty/snobbish, esp in AIBU like it's some kind of MN ethos. Honestly kids it isn't you can just be reasonable and pleasant and just tut in your head about spelling and grammar mistakes. Try it, you'll win the Internet, I promise Smile

Original poster
SherlustHolmes · 07/01/2014 20:34

Oh God I'm not cod! I've just reread my post and it looks like I'm those posters - not the case! Sorry for being unclear.

OP posts:
Passmethecrisps · 07/01/2014 20:34

It's nice to be important
But it's more important to be nice

So there

scottishmummy · 07/01/2014 20:35

If your auld timer you'll remember there always been gp big Heids trying to set rules on mn
Which I fastidiously ignore
I like the simply can't read your posts,too scottish!aye but understand enough to know what you no likey...funny

Passmethecrisps · 07/01/2014 20:36

Total derailment but do you know what "fenny" means sm?

Farrowandbawl · 07/01/2014 20:36

pmsl Mummy. That always makes me laugh too.

Tweasels · 07/01/2014 20:37

That would make a great game show question SherlustHolmes.

Q. What connects the following? Cod. Lavender. Moldies. Shitting elves. Pirates and That fucking bat?

A. Mumsnet, obvs Confused

Grin
Droves · 07/01/2014 20:44

Is cod even about anymore ? I know she namechanged , but her distinctive style of posting gave her away .

The nitpickers have probably driven everyone awesome away ... its mostly newer member on here now.
Mn feels different ...used to come on to get cheered up , now its like some are trying to goad arguments .

Mintyy · 07/01/2014 20:45

Ragwort - she still posts but ncs all the time.

Mintyy · 07/01/2014 20:47

Couldn't agree more Droves. I used to come on here for amusement and entertainment. Now it just pisses me off! Got to wean self off ...

KarmaVersusGeorgeOsbourne · 07/01/2014 20:48

YANBU. I've been hovering around MN for about 5 years, and I do think it has got particularly bad recently. I still enjoy it, but also feel grumpiness rubbing off on me. Also some threads that shouldn't go sour, do, and it just makes me feel that people are a lot bitchier and judgier than I thought.

southeastastra · 07/01/2014 20:49

yep agree with op, it's becoming very hard to freely talk on here and have fun. i got a pm not long ago telling me off for a word i'd used.

it's really tedious and i don't really know why people do this

theQuibbler · 07/01/2014 20:54

Mumsnet has changed a lot which, I suppose, is only to be expected. Still, I really don't like the, "you should have known better" and the "why didn't you?" brigade who seem very prevalent nowadays. Mumsnet has always stood out to me because it's a place where you could get support and advice but I feel as though some of the tough, but ultimately fair, kind and helpful mentality that used to distinguish this place is disappearing.

BabyMummy29 · 07/01/2014 20:55

I'm fairly new on here and thought it was a place where we could discuss matters and offer opinions to help each other out.

However I'm getting fed up, when talking about badly behaved kids for example, to get shouted down by parents of kids with special needs.

Also when talking about teachers not having good standards of SPAG, to be told that people with poor abilities might make excellent teachers etc etc

There seem to be so many people jumping on the sexist, disablist, ageist bandwagons that I don't know if this is the place for me or not.

scottishmummy · 07/01/2014 20:58

Once got a pm telling me I was quite obviously having a breakdown
I get told off for spelling and composition on mn
They find it too scottish,too impudent.i must be below stairs

Sparklingbrook · 07/01/2014 21:02

Shock sm. Did you reply to the PM?

scottishmummy · 07/01/2014 21:03

Naw,made me smile though,it was long,intrusive and a big bit daft

Sparklingbrook · 07/01/2014 21:05
Grin
Passmethecrisps · 07/01/2014 21:10

I don't like the "surely you just. . . " type of post.

The kind which says 'I know you don't but I am going to ask in a sort of everyone does kind of way and make you feel terrible about it'

Generally though, I have lots of fun. I have had times when I have been left genuinely breathless though. And not in a good way.

TiggyOBE · 07/01/2014 21:14

The OP forgot to use a capital letter at the start of the thread title so all her opinions can be ignored.

ChubbyKitty · 07/01/2014 21:45

Yanbu. I've only been here since February(..or was it march?Blush) and I used to post when I thought I had a decent reply for the OP. Nowadays I think "oh, I have the answer" but don't feel confident enough to post it for fear of getting picked up on goodness knows what, or I post it and dread looking at the thread again in case loads of people have had a go at me.

Actually that's kinda sad now I think about it.