To think DH and I are like a sexy, hot couple from a Hollywood film

[catgirl1976]

Based on this exchange last night

Me: "Hey DH. DS is at DPs for the night. How nice is that. We can really relax. We could even have sex."

DH "Mm."

Me: "Mind you, I've not shaved my legs for weeks and I have a full on 70s bush so we'd have to leave the lights out."

DH: "Yes. And I've had a really bad stomach all day and been on the loo every 5 minutes."

Me: "Shall we give it a miss?"

DH: "Yeah. Ooh look Antiques Road show has got a play-along thingy"

It just doesn't get any hotter or more glamorous than that does it?

Except we are both shattered from scrubbing and need to cook dinner for DS

There's always my birthday.....in September

We might work up the energy by then

Dh had sexy time thoughts last night but then realised I'd put new covers on.
He knew better than to ask.

I can't read past the first few posts as I've just had surgery and laughing hurts

We are just like a couple from a Hollywood film actually.

Shrek.

^ that made me proper snort

"Power Shag" .

I change the sheets for sex .

This is really patronising I guess but they are a lot of the time like children.

My colleagues and I quite often (secretly) use parenting strategies we use at work with our OHs :)

Or the "while you're down there.." one when I've bent down to pick something up.

God your dh is hot.
Is he a fireman?????

I read Cilit Bang as Clit Bang.
I must put the light on.

I wish he was a fireman :)

He's a graphic designer pt and a SAHD

But I might make him dress as a fireman

We had our first night off/morning off together in 2 months on Saturday and both really really fancied getting merry and horny... Both got the stomach flu and spent all night/following day on the loo! Thank goodness for 2 toilets!

Some smooth DHs on here

Does anyone else get the 2 minutes shoulder rub as foreplay?

I sometimes get "while you're down there".......

I know if he's been using the talcum powder he has high hopes for later.

I get the shoulder rub .

I get the shoulder rub. DH is making hard done by noises about the lack of recent sex - I think the fact we've managed it once since DC2 was born 8 weeks ago is a miracle & he should be bloody grateful

I'd rather have the shoulder rub :) Not the two minute one followed by hopeful nipple fiddling

Mine asks me if he should go and have a shower. Yes but it still doesn't mean you're getting it.

Also if it may be on the cards, he expects me to wait until he's done the washing up an watched the News. I've often lost interest by then!

Do like the News at Ten on in bed.
I am very up on current affairs

Going to make DP read this. Hopefully he can see the funny side of our non existent sex life!

'fancy a shag' while licking his lips and rubbing his hands together - Hes EX!!

I love that bit in one of the Shrek movies when Shrek and Fiona just collapse exhausted onto the bed after a fun day looking after their babies.

Round this way, the way to tell what DH's intentions are is to see if he's awake.

And why do they all think "While you're down there..." is hilarious?

Now if I really was Mrs DB I would be a rampant strumpet.

Power shag? Genius!