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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Some f**king old bag

246 replies

Mummasmurf · 15/12/2013 17:31

Is it me?

We moved towns in July and started going to the local church. I joined the choir in November (half of which can't sing). A few weeks ago one of the old bags shouted loudly that she wished my DD would stop running round. I glared at her. The "running round" was that she went to the back of the church and came back to tell the choir master it sounded "beautiful".

Tonight we were at a Christingle service (a kids service basically) and she loudly had a go again cos the DD stood up to have a look at the goings on.

I'm really pissed off at her and now I don't know whether I should bother going back. The other women said she was out of order and don't let it get to me. It's just that when it's your kids someone's having a go at it's worse than if she was having a go at me.

OP posts:
GiveItYourBestStockings · 15/12/2013 17:35

Is it generally a child-friendly church? Our vicar is making a big effort to welcome and include children, we had a wee boy running up and down the aisle at Christingle and she said maybe all the children would like to join him and come and dance at the front, which I thought was lovely.

BitOfFunWithSanta · 15/12/2013 17:38

What an overreaction on your part- and a really horrible thread title. It's such an unpleasant way to talk about an older woman- you'll be one too one day, you know.

VerySmallSqueak · 15/12/2013 17:40

I would shout loudly back that I wished she could be more tolerant of children unless she wants the church to die with her generation.

But I am a gobby non believer,so possibly not the best way forward.....

DivingBell · 15/12/2013 17:40

I think it's you.

HTH Xmas Smile

HyvaPaiva · 15/12/2013 17:40

Fucking old bag? Glared?

Shock

Horrible, just horrible. Your behaviour, not hers.

JanineStHubbins · 15/12/2013 17:40

Your OP comes across as horribly misogynstic and ageist.

Do your fellow choir-members know what nasty opinions you hold of them?

Groovee · 15/12/2013 17:42

Ignore her. There is always one in every church.

complexnumber · 15/12/2013 17:42

Mince pies at dawn!

Salmotrutta · 15/12/2013 17:42

one of the old bags Hmm

So not only have you called someone a horrible name in your title but you have classed all the older women as "old bags"

Maybe your child was being annoying or maybe she wasn't.

But you sound charming...

SecretSantaFix · 15/12/2013 17:42

How old is your dd, by the way?

usualsuspect · 15/12/2013 17:43

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Salmotrutta · 15/12/2013 17:44

Now now usual Wink

Tinks42 · 15/12/2013 17:44

Oh dear, does everyone "have" to be able to sing to join the choir? Now you're calling people old bags? really? I don't go to church very often etc. but even at a childs service I'd expect the parent not to let a child run up and down the isles etc.

paxtecum · 15/12/2013 17:45

OP: Are you happy in your new town?

Or did you prefer were you used to live?

MrsBramleyApple · 15/12/2013 17:46

I'm glad you don't come to our church!

ItsIgginningToLookALotLikeXmas · 15/12/2013 17:46

I hope you would speak in a less offensive manner when not angry about your dc being criticised. Regarding a Christingle service it should indeed be one to attract the whole family.
Which type of church is it in general - a tolerant-of-children-playing one or a keep-them-quiet-and-motionless one? If the former, then it is just one person so ignore them. If the later, I'd look for another church since you have a small child. Either way, hoping you come back on to say sorry for the language in your OP. Xmas Smile

LadyBeagleEyes · 15/12/2013 17:46

I hate the expression old bag.
Maybe they just don't like you OP, and with your attitude I can understand why.
From a fellow old bag.

maresedotes · 15/12/2013 17:47

You both sound as charming as each other. Going to church and being nice to one and all doesn't seem to be working does it?

DejaVuAllOverAgain · 15/12/2013 17:47

Well, aren't you charming Hmm

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 15/12/2013 17:47

I did not know you could go to church and say fucking. Grin

saulaboutme · 15/12/2013 17:48

Yanbu but don't seeth, tell her!

She is obviously not child friendly. There is a woman at my,church like this and I told her to NOT boss my dcs or nit pick at them in get horrible way.

She hates my guts now but I thought F you! She doesn't own the church it the choir and she sounds like a bully.

stickysausages · 15/12/2013 17:48

You sound delightful Biscuit

onlyfortonight · 15/12/2013 17:48

Let me know where the church is, and I'll bring my DDs round. They can never sit still in church, but no one has ever said anything to me about them and they are all very welcoming.

The thing is, if we don't allow children and families into church, then the church will die out. Speak to the Vicar and see what their policy is. They will probably be very supportive and might even take the women aside for a chat. Don't let it stop you going.

livinginawinterwonderland · 15/12/2013 17:49

Old bags? Hmm

stickysausages · 15/12/2013 17:49

Sorry, have a christingle one instead Xmas Biscuit