for wanting a joint account?

[Xfirefly]

Me and OH been together 7 years, lived together for 4 and have DD 3 months. we own our own home. I'm currently on maternity leave and after a discussion have decided that I will stay home with DD as it wouldnt be worth going to work after childcare costs etc. I was feeling quite guilty about it all at first feeling I was sponging but I'm past that now as OH keeps saying we're a family etc.

I brought up the idea of a joint account seeing as I'll be doing a lot of the shopping etc but OH is dead against this. he said work colleagues have told him not to do it because they argue with their wives (we never argue). I said I'm not going to take money without asking and he said its not that , he trusts me 100% but he's never agreed with joint accounts.

I'm worried that I'm going to be shopping and if I have to sign for it I'm going to be in trouble for using his card arnt I?

any other sahp not have a joint account? how do you deal with the money? did your partner send money to your account?

any advice would be great.

Joysmum no a joint account doesn't offer security in that way. It offers reassurance that the op's dp sees her as an equal partner not someone who can't be trusted with money. My protective security is in the form of a savings account containing £££ in my name only.

good morning all , thank you all for your comments.

We're planning to get married in 2015. this year had to be put off because the house needs a new fuse box and boiler and they're very expensive. they're the top of the list at the moment.

we've actually had a bit of progress, he came home from work this morning and said he'd been thinking about what I had been saying. he thought I wanted him to just have a joint account and no other separate accounts , to which I said no . he then said we'll open a joint account and he'll put a big some of his money into it every month for bills and for me. he said I can either spend it from there or i could transfer it to my bank or savings account. basically do what I wish with it. he said when I go back to work we'll both put bits of our wages into the joint account for shopping and bills etc. then have our separate accounts for us. he was afraid wed only have the one account for everything.

I'm happy hes thought this through now. he said his mum had no other accounts just the joint account and thats what put him off (surely can understand this). he's happy that we can have a joint and our own accounts now. we're going down the bank Friday

in regards to credit cards, once I've paid mine off it won't be used again unless its an extreme emergency. I only had it to get a good credit rating for the mortgage . he pays his off monthly.

Sounds like it has all worked out in the end then It took my husband a few days of silent pondering before he came round to my way of thinking. I think men just like to think things through more thoroughly before making any conclusions. I'm glad you have reached this decision and enjoy your Christmas with your new baby

thank you writer, yeah he always seems to think a lot through during a night shift. he may have had a talk with work colleagues who knows.

As someone who used to do night shifts, I used to have my most profound ideas during that time too :)

I'm a sahm. We have a joint account, dh has his own current account, we both have personal savings accounts. We both have credit cards in our own name. It's a good way to go - OP, as well as the joint account, make sure you have an account in your own name that you can access if ever the worst happens.

Personally I think that's the best solution - a single account for both of you and a joint account that he pays into and you will too when you start earning again. Bravo firefly

(Of course I would think that because that's what we do )