to think that this article is just another way to sneer at sahms? Motherism?

[usuallyright]

www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/nov/18/sorry-but-being-a-mother-is-not-the-most-important-job-in-the-world

Whilst I agree with some of it, I don't like the sneery tone. There are many similar articles around at the moment about Mothers who choose to stay at home.
Imagine if someone wrote a similar article about working Mothers.
It's just another excuse to pour scorn on Mothers and their choices, which are often complex decisions, not a knee jerk decision to be a martyr..

but chunderella , that's a choice to be made.. if people decide to make that choice then that's what they got to live with

If you see it as 'family money' rather than his or her income then you account for it as work. As i said previously, although it appears to have been ignored, depending on circumstances the advantage may be greater for the family if one person stays at home. I know a few SAHP where they are not financially hobbled in any way, they are happy as they were in professional jobs - so it can be rewarding, can be mundane but they will most likely not return to their fields with the same intensity and commitment ever again.

Chunderealla - Don't worry, I didn't read it as unsympathetic, I was just taking it in for what it was, another aspect of an interesting discussion

chunderealla - all I am saying is we all make choices .. if you decide to be a stahm mum then unfortuntly yes that is a downside of it, but it is their choice no one can have it all.

and it is not only stahm that see the burden financially or even in the future with pensions.

I have to quit my job next week for different reasons to actually wanting to. I know deep down that if I reallllly did want to then I would stay working , so in theory its my choice to lose my future stability.

chundereall you know nothing about my choices, I know how it feels not to have a choice.

what I mean sorry let me clarify is that no matter who we are , what are choices are , what life throws at us .. we going to be shorted in some way . people from all diff walks of life raise children in lots of different ways it doesn't make anyone wrong.

we can all complain about our lifes, I had a conversation with a neighbour about quitting work last week ( she has 1 child ) . she asked me how I would afford to quit my job and I said I wouldn't be able to with DLA and carers allowance .. her reply was I was lucky to have that option !!

• without DLA and carers allowance

the whole SAH/WOH debate missed that fact you remain your parents child and they your parent up until the point one of you dies.

the whole precious moments/they are only children for a short time - forgets for most of your life time relationship with your children or your parents, you both are adults.

mum what a terrible thing to say (your neighbour I mean)

No matter what anyone says or how logical their argument will be, I will never be able to get my head around the fact that some SAHP's believe that staying home to look after their own child is just as much a job as what a WP has to do in order to earn money to pay the bills and buy food I just don't grasp that way of thinking.

Write that one down, writerwannabe, and look at it in a year's time. I'm a working parent, BTW...

Wilson I know I was kinda like hmm I think I would rather not be a candidate for either of those things. and if I wasn't I would quite happily stay at work as I actually love working.

I agree with you writer on all points.

I find other peoples kid much easier to look after than my own, am I alone in that?

It depends for me whereismyhat. I think its difficult 20 kids plus but my own cant be that loud as there is only a couple. [grin[ However they have annoying moments, overall though my own children at home is pretty easy going.