to think that this article is just another way to sneer at sahms? Motherism?

[usuallyright]

www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/nov/18/sorry-but-being-a-mother-is-not-the-most-important-job-in-the-world

Whilst I agree with some of it, I don't like the sneery tone. There are many similar articles around at the moment about Mothers who choose to stay at home.
Imagine if someone wrote a similar article about working Mothers.
It's just another excuse to pour scorn on Mothers and their choices, which are often complex decisions, not a knee jerk decision to be a martyr..

Op:you say "imagine if someone wrote such an article about woring mothers ....There are LOADS of articles all the time sneering at working mothers and making them feel guilty and bad for not being able to stay at home. Most weekend s some uk paper has such an article. you can't win!

Kids dont bore me shitless, however being at home does personally.

falling, the difference is that if such an article were discussed here, a great majority would be supportive of it, have seen it happen before. And seen posters berate sahm's for criticising wohms, but then remain silent when a sahm is being badly bashed...

i don't think the article was revelant to any of the actual thread failing lol ... it had digs at both sides and was more about parenting not being a job which could be aimed at both not just one. and btw I totally agree with you

usually yes small minded people , but who gives anyone the right to attack someone on their life ?
no matter which parent you are ?

there is no need for anyone to slag of one kind of people because they feel like some people slag them off because there choices... because there is too many variables. i would defiantly defend a stahm aswell btw.

bottom line is that it's badly written, I expect better from the guardian!

I'm not allowed to have an opinion on whether I'd like to be a SAHP parent because I haven't had the baby yet?

Why exactly?

I really don't understand why some people on MN can't handle the fact that different people have different opinions on things!! Difference of opinions (pre-conceived or not) are actually allowed and it doesn't have to mean that snide/nasty comments are required

your more than entitled to your opinion writerwannabe :)

Thank you mum -that's what I thought we were all entitled to without being bashed for having one

yes of course you're entitled to an opinion, but I think having an opinion on something you've not experienced yet; well, let's just say they sometimes/often change when reality bites...

writer said:
"I don't think I'd be bored as a SAHP (I'm pretty sure that before the child starts school SAHP's are probably shattered keeping up with the children all day) but I wouldn't be satisfied either. I would feel like I was wasting years of my life and that my degree/job had all been for nothing"

Usually I presume your post at 19:19 was in response to writer?

Well I've given birth twice, so by your reasoning I'm allowed to have an opinion? I happen to agree with Writer - one of the reasons I went back to work was because I felt like it would have been a waste to give up all that I had achieved in my career.

This doesn't mean I detest or sneer at SAHMs, it just means I have a different opinion & outlook.

It doesn't have to be one or the other, everyone is different.

so now you're saying I'm allowed opinion but it is one you laugh at and then tell me I should leave the thread because why? My opinions and thoughts are cr*p as I haven't had my baby yet?

Yes my thoughts may change, I've said throughout the thread that I'm still on the fence as to what decision to make once the baby is born. That's why I'm enjoying the thread because it is giving me lots to think about - I didn't realise only parents were allowed to contribute to it though....

Of course you are entitled to your opinion writer

Jesus wept, this has gone a bit circular. I fail to see how anyone could argue that SAHPs aren't financially hobbled tbh. If you are out of the workforce for any significant time, then yes you will be financially hobbled. You may chose this, you may be delighted by it, you may feel you're doing the best for your children, you may be completely happy to accept it, but taking 5 years or whatever out of work has a financial impact. That is just a fact.

Have you read any of the boards on here?

I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks about my choice to be a SAHM.
Don't judge me and I won't judge you.
It's my choice and nothing to do with anyone else but me DD and DP.

What do you expect Chunderella,whoever reduces hours or takes time off will find themselves restricted for a while.

Both my sister and her husband reduced hours because they both wanted a day at home with their dc.Now they're both at school they're both upping their hours,careers back on track.They both knew before they had kids that it would have an impact but they wanted them so they took the temp pain.

I knew it would have an impact on my career.Dp offered but I wanted the time with the dc more.Having looked childlessness in the face for best part of 10 years my wrecked career is 100% worth it.You are only lent children for a short time,for many women that transcends a totally unblemished career.

sigh....

Oh and Wilson according to wp they're hobbled by childcare bills.Kids hobble you- but they're worth it.

Yay! We're finally agreed. Being a parent is definitely worth it, 100%. And my DH agrees too

yy Retro.

Disproportionately nope didn't miss that out.

Penalised for being with my children. I think not.

Sorry I think wp are penalised - they miss a lot.It breaks my sisters heart.

No amount of money would be worth me missing the hours I had with my dc.

I agree with you writer. I thought that before my first and still think that a couple of kids in. Some people dont like the slow pace of life and want to do it all