To think if it's ok to use "Wendy" to describe bullying women

[sparklysilversequins]

Then we should come up with names for other characteristics including physical in people too?

Eg. Fat Women - Lisa's
Fat Men - Stephens
Men who hit women - Toms
Women who hit men - Emma's
Nasty male bosses - Gordon's
Nasty Female bosses - Gemma's
Shirty impatient teachers - Mary's
People who shoplift - Leslie/Lesley's

Do you see what I am saying? Because quite frankly I am sick to the back teeth of seeing posters whining about being "Wendied". It's hurtful and insulting to people with that name. I love someone dearly with the name Wendy and whenever I see her name used like that on here it makes me so .

Why is it ok to take someone's name, the most fundamental thing about a person and use it as a Noun to describe really awful, spiteful, manipulative people. Truthfully would you be fine seeing it if it was YOUR name or your child's name?

Never heard this before. Ever. As long as no one is going to use 'jammied' I'm happy for you to ahead

It's on here ALL the time. There's a thread in chat right now. Every couple of weeks another one pops up then everyone comes on and tells tales of their "Wendy" and what an evil bitch she is.

I have to agree OP. I have a friend called Wendy and she is the most kind, gentle, unassuming person I know. Makes me a bit sad when I see the name used this way but then I remember it isn't actually every Wendy they are referring to.

there have been a few threads on here about it, I wouldn't say "all the time.", I don't like it for same reasons as OP although I don't feel strongly about it.

I've only seen it on here. Didn't it come from a thread about a pita that op chose to call "Wendy".

Yanbu but difficult when it's caught on.

Never heard of it but it's not really very nice is it.

It started because someone happened to used Wendy when keeping a situation anonymous and from then on it was used to refer to the lady who'd been causing trouble. It wasn't just that the name Wendy is the name of someone you'd expect to mean. The Wendy I know is lovely and I appreciate it does nothing to tarnish her character when it's used on here.

But it's from a book... I don't understand why it's such a big deal.

JP

AFAIR, it came from a thread where the bully happened to be called Wendy. Happy to be corrected though. I think it's only used on here.

X post

yy headinhands

sparkly you are over thinking this. There was, once upon a time, a few months ago, I think a poster who was having trouble in her friendship circle with a bullying woman who made like a cuckoo and edged the poster out of her social group. The poster referred to this woman as Wendy. Not her real name, of course.

And Wendy stuck as a shorthand for this particular type of friendship-wrecking woman. That is the backstory, just in case you are new

I don't think anyone outside MN will know what a Wendy is....

These all link back to a thread in which the OP chose "Wendy" as the pseudonym of the woman in her story who joined her group of friends and then turned them against her. Not sure I can get too worked up about it. Think of the poor Kevins and Traceys or Tim (as in nice but dim). All names have some common baggage.

YANBU

OP

thousands of people are called Wendy. It isn't the most fundamental thing about them. My name isn't the most fundamental name about me.I don't think anyone is seriously suggesting everyone called Wendy is horrible.

"You are over thinking this"

No I am not. I've waited months to post this and then saw another one today.

Let's change it to your name then or your dd's name, or any loved family member. Yes let's use your name to describe people who are nasty spiteful and manipulative because someone wrote it in a book once.

What is the most fundamental thing about you then if not your name?

It is not a slur on all Wendys though- just an MN in-joke which is only used on MN because of a specific thread, in which the "Wendy's" behaviour seemed to strike a chord with several others.

It has become MN shorthand for that kind of situation, but it is not implying that anybody called Wendy is likely to be a stirrer, or whatever it was.

I don't think I've ever used the term myself, but I think you are being a bit over-sensitive.

(Is it a full moon?)

Leaving aside entirely the issue of Wendy, OP, do you see what you've done in your post?

You list a lot of unpleasant behaviours/types from men who hit women to shoplifters, unpleasant bosses and impatient teachers, and then you add in fat men and woman, as if their fatness was somehow equivalent to wifebeating or stealing...?

So forgive me for not minding that your sensitive soul is deeply wounded by the use of a name.

Yes, it's only used on Mn, and yes, it arose from a thread I remember, where the OP was describing some unpleasantly juvenile schoolgate friendship politics, and she chose the name Wendy at random for the ringleader. People find it a useful shorthand for 'unpleasant person who winkles her way into your social group and proceeds to alienate all your friends from you like something out of Mean Girls'.

It wouldn't bother me at all if my name was used in that way.
That's just silly.

Well like I said let's give names to all behaviour that is viewed negatively or deemed unacceptable then.

Won't anyone think of poor Billy, poor Billy-no-mates? He has a hard life too.

Loads of names have baggage. When I was growing up people used to say 'she's a bit of a Sharon' to describe a TOWIEesque type person. Rudolphs used to be associated with Rudolph Valentino before Hess and the red nosed reindeer came about. Myra used to be a nice name.