To be pretty uncomfortable with home circumcision

[EastofEast]

We get on very well with our neighbours and are pretty close but I was a bit shocked today, one of those moments where you find you really have opposing views on something quite fundamental.

Neighbour has a (gorgeous) two week old boy. She knocked on the door earlier to return my car keys (went to get a new battery for hers in my car) and I mentioned her new ds was unsettled for the first time ever; joking maybe he wasn't the perfect baby after all. My baby is demanding much more vocal about her needs. She said it was because he was circumcised today. I must have looked a little put off, I don't agree with it at all, as she then said 'oh he's doing really well. We were lucky the doctor came to house to do this one, all the others had to go to a clinic'. I was stunned, I'm amazed you're allowed to do such a thing at home in such an unregulated way. Frankly I wouldn't allow any deliberate harm to come to a child that wasn't medically necessary, but considering some people do do it I thought the rules would be tighter. We're both from (different) backgrounds which circumcise, although I refused to change my son, and I knew she'd do it after a related chat about whether fgm was that bad over a coffee one day but it's still upset me a bit the way it's done. The poor little thing is grumpy with loads of adults around to celebrate the event passing him round and round at 8.30pm.

I know the circumcision vs no circumcision has been done already, and not everyone shares my strong views, but at home? Should this be ok? I can't think of other similar procedures happening in a similar environment.

I don't think it's any of your business to be honest.

If there is a god I really can't imagine he'd be arsed about blokes having a foreskin. Religious/cultural circumcision - whether it's at home or in hospital is barbaric.

Here we go again..

DS was circumcised by a mohel at home and we know tonnes of family and friends who have been. All grown to be normal, sexually functioning and balanced individuals.

Hopefully these practices will die out in time.

I don't disagree with circumcision, DS is circumcised due to medical reasons and if I had another son, I would get him circumcised too at birth, but people on this thread saying that its a minor procedure that doesn't need to be done in hospitals or by a qualified professional are absolutely wrong.

It is not a minor procedure and there is a lot of potential for it to go horribly wrong. It needs to be done by someone who will know what to do if something does go wrong and can take the appropriate steps to prevent a fatality.

Appletarts - exactly. I held my son whilst the procedure was carried out (not the norm I know) and agree that his immunisations definitely caused him far more distress.

We've got on to Judaism, but no one in the OP is jewish....or probably even knows any closely socially given the area/ family and cultural backgrounds.

Outside Judaism, it may be different?

Fakebook - think it becomes more complicated the later in life it is carried out. The mohel we used would not circumcise a boy over 3 months old.

one of the main things circumcision does is lower male sexual sensitivity.

the hygiene motivations seem pretty ridiculous where people can wash.

so, all that's left is saying its "cultural", which seems a pretty poor and bizarre defence tbh, certainly in the face of the unnecessary surgery/pain/cruelty.

as I said these things will die out in time, and it will be seen for the barbaric and unnecessary practice it actually is.

can anyone who has done it (bar medical reasons) give a reason/purpose? just saying its "cultural" be it muslim, jewish or chrisitan is not really a reason or justification, exactly ...

Totally agree TrueStory.

maybe umaisha you find it tiresome, here we go again, maybe ordinary people fine it tiresomely barbaric and pointless.

regarding the immunisation comparison, for the record, I would actually question the value of some immunisations on babies, including the pain inflicted.

but even if I didn't agree, and refused immunisation for my own child, I could see the point and why some people chose to do it, IYSWIM.

I was somewhat stunned to see an ADVERT on the "Baby TV" thing they have in antenatal waiting rooms, advertising a home service for this. In amongst the usual "How to ensure baby is correctly strapped in", "How to claim SMP", "breastfeeding advice" and the Johnsons, pushchair etc adverts. I am astounded that advertising this in that way was permitted (and never mind my own personal thoughts on the matter!)

I am not seeing the comparison between an injection and the removal of the foreskin without anaesthetic. I understand that numbing cream is increasingly being used in 'home' procedures - but even so for the baby it must be terribly painful afterwards.

If I were the OP and listening to a baby in distress after home surgery I'd be on the phone to the local HV team at the very least.

If you are cruel and ignorant enough to find circumcision preferable then you are no doubt vile enough to do it at home. Stupid is as stupid does, after all.

I would feel discomforted by it op.

Unless it's for medical reasons I think it is entirely uncessary.

It boils down to this:

Causing a non-reversible change in a person's body for no good reason, is wrong. Until the baby can give some form of consent, it should be left with its foreskin firmly in place.

I don't care what your culture is, or what deity you believe in. Leave babies and children alone until they can make their own decisions!

Comparing Genital Mutilation to immunizations is bizarre!

Why not wait until they are old enough to make the decision them self.

I think you'll find this is called diversity

That depends on who is calling it. Others call it genital mutilation.

As far as the procedure itself, done by a qualified medical professional, it can be done as a minor surgery in a medical office. I used to work for a couple specialists (urologist and a general surgeon) in the states, and circumcisions were done in the office (in a suitable environment obviously). Having said that, it was literally minutes to the hospital from the office - not that it was ever needed. I believe the procedure is much more commonplace in the states than it is here though.

"How one earth to you keep proper checks on this when you do it in a home."

Checks like what?

To see the doctor doesn't don't chop half of the penis off?

I don't understand why some culture see fit to mess around with children genitals.

IMO both male and female circumcision should be banned unless there is a medical need for it to be done.

I'm pretty uncomfortable with the idea of unnecessarily slicing off a piece of skin from a baby, regardless of location. There's no reason for it. At all.

It's a barbaric practise no matter where it's done.

I just wish it was illegal unless absolutely medically necessary.

Some of the answers on this thread are like the twilight zone. It's a dreadful, dangerous, violent assault on a baby. It's barbaric.