To think the school need to support my child

[mychildisnotnaughty]

DS turned 4 at the end of July so started in reception as one of the youngest. Hes been struggling and today I was called in because he ran out of the hall in a PE lesson then when the TA tried to get him back in, he had a tantrum. He then had to wear his PE kit the rest of the day as he refused to get changed and he had no top on as he refused to wear his t shirt.

They said he won't line up either and runs off, also had a tantrum when going to lunch. Also keeps trying to run off at the end of the day.

At the moment I feel he is not being supported, they just keep trying to put him in time out but this doesn't work, I said he needs ignoring but they said that isn't possible. To me it's all down to him being a summer born.

They also complained he's been annoying the school rabbit, this really upset me as at home he loves animals.

AIBU to think they need to do more to help than ring me, as he behaves fine at home so I can't do anything.

He doesn't even have established 'additional needs'. You may be aware (or possibly not) that 'additional needs' is a term favoured by some as an alternative to SN and in fact is the term officially adopted by Scotland in their SEN strategies.

lougle In our LA additional needs is not used in that manner (not the same as Scotland), it covers children who receive FSM and for whom English is an additional language. Also it is used to describe needs which are simply additional to the norm, where no diagnosis of SN has been given, no SEN established.

So with my working definition, additional needs do not need to be established, they are just there. If the school decides to spend some of their budget to cater for these needs, they can do, within the purposes of the new funding legislation. It is the reason why the additional funding has been delegated back to the schools.

It is a decision for the school's SMT.

To think that this is 'all down to being summer born' is bu. He is 4. Plenty of children start part time school at 3 and plenty of others at 4 and this behaviour is not shown.

I still think it is unhelpful to think of this as a funding issue or that the school 'should be spending money on this.'

The issue is that you have a child with school behaviour that either:

a)is not seen at home
or
b) is managed differently at home and therefore averted
or
c) is allowed at home and isn't seen as negative

They need to work together to find out which and decide what to do about it.

lougle I think it is a funding issue, because everything is. It determines staffing, outside support and expertise, training and resources such as nurture rooms. Schools complain when they haven't enough funding.

However also I do think parents and schools should work together. I have not disputed this at all during this thread. Only highlighted the need for an equal, mutually respectful, working partnership.

A school's "funding" isn't a bottomless pit, bramble, to be plundered for Nurture rooms for children who likely as not have simply never been expected to follow instructions or do anything they didn't fancy doing before.

The onus is on the parent to send their child to school with some understanding of what's expected of him, behaviour wise.

I not saying school's funding is a bottomless pit Floggingmolly. However schools have had more funding delegated to them for additional needs and they need to be prioritising this money appropriately.

As lougle has already explained; additional needs is the new, presumed to be less offensive term for what were called special needs before it became a term of abuse.
Children resisting the rules and rituals of school routine do not have official additional needs.

Flogging I don't mind what you want to call this particular set of needs. I have given you a working definition of my usage. It is up to the schools to make use of the extra funding available to them. It could be used to cater for needs such as the OP has described.

Bottom line is this child has a right to an education and the school has to be showing that they are doing all they can, within their power (they should be putting 6k aside for additional needs or possible SEN), to cater for his needs.

Anything less is failing their Duty of Care, their responsibilities as an education provider.

why should they throw money at this child though who as far as we know has no additional needs?

surely this early in the game the school and Mum need to work together (yes mum, including suggesting ideas, preparing at home rather than saying 'he is fine here it is your problem') to combat this first. you dont often see a problem and instantly chuck cash at it like a plaster, you need to have a good look as to why it needs a plaster in the first place and see if you can fix the problem and stop it reoccuring

But, Bramble, there might well be extra funding available but that still doesn't say they would get granted any of it. The schools still have to justify why they need it and apply for it.

They are not failing in their duty of care at all. The child has been at school for 6 weeks. Do you even realise how long it takes to arrange assessments and ed psychs? They don't just turn up the week after you've asked for them. In fact you'd be lucky to see one after a 6 month wait.

NotYoManner They should be utilising resource because not all parents are able to adequately support the school from home.

These children, with this particular set of parents, still have a right to an education.

YouTheCat they have the funding upfront, in their budget, 6k individual spend, on top of AWPU. They do not need to apply for this. I thought you said you read the new funding legislation?

The initial funding lump sum may depend on lots of factors, Prior Attainment, FSM, School Expansion, sparsity....

So you think they should use that 6k for the benefit of one child?

If it is for additional needs it will probably go towards a Lexia programme or some such thing that will benefit the whole school.

but this OP hasnt even tried to support tye school at home, she has told them to ignore him which they CAN NOT DO

lets face it, if OP is having to ignore her childs behaviour anyway then he obviously isnt as well behaved at home as she would like us to think.

she should maybe stop ignoring her child and help the school with the root cause, throwing money at this with no parental input is a recipe for failureits like when parents dont read with their kids or ensure homework is done and then get pissed at the school because 'thats what school is for'

SN or not (and my DD was like this at preschool because she had undiagnosed autism not because of my parenting. .nice to know the parents were judging my parenting as lacking) it's a bit rich to be ripping the OP apart and saying she is an ineffective parent on a thread where she is looking for support, flogging.

The school should definitely be working with the parent here and adapting their routines so that the child can learn to get used to them.

YouTheCat preventing disruption can benefit a whole class of children. Behavioural needs can be considered SEN or additional needs, which can be about supporting just one child, out of a class of 30. These needs by definition are held by a minority of children. The extra funding delegated to schools is for needs such as these.

So the short answer is yes.

A lot of the times you mention OP when he's struggling are transitions between one thing and the next. A visual schedule so he can see everything that's coming and what's happening next may help.

What does the teacher think he's communicating with the behaviour? Is there a message? Like 'I need attention' or 'I'm worried about this', or 'I don't want to do that' or no apparent trigger which might be excitement, anxiety, overstimulation? If she can get a feel for the message it might help pin down the strategies that will work.

Sorry you're handling this, must be very worrying.

Also there is a place for ignoring behaviour. .it can be a technique in itself so I wish people would stop sticking their pitchforks in OP and pillorying her as an ineffective parent.

But the child has been there 6 weeks, Bramble. Can you not see that spending 6k without trying other things first is not a sensible use of resources at this stage?

And yes, ignoring some behaviours can be effective. But I really don't think it is practical when dealing with a 'runner' in a school environment.

they have the funding upfront, in their budget, 6k individual spend, on top of AWPU. They do not need to apply for this

Are you saying that the HT has £6,000 per child already in the budget, ready to spend?

Or are you saying that the HT has a total of £6,000 for the whole school, already in the budget, ready to spend?

I'm not clear on that point.

Interesting that the OP has chosen to ignore this thread rather than come back and discuss some of these issues.

YouTheCat The child may only need extra support temporarily...supporting the child will prevent a negative association of school being acquired by the child, which would only cause further problems.

If they need the support more permanently, providing it initially, will prevent problems from escalating and will allow provision to be put in place more permanently.

Running to me is clearly a stress response and not a naughty one.

No wonder the OP has run away. .people are blaming her parenting