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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really exasperated at OH being mugged tonight?

124 replies

owhatashambles · 09/10/2013 00:39

He lost his wallet, his phone, cash. Second phone lost in a month. Can't help thinking he gets himself into these situations. He is not auditioning for Jeremy Kyle as far as I know but meant to be a mature professional. Guess who has to clean up the mess - cancel the card, cancel the phone, replace said cards and phone? Oh and be parent and hold down a pretty stressful job. Just want to scream rather than offer sympathy. Well I will make soothing noises as soon as he's back but am not impressed. Evil woman.

OP posts:
JaneFonda · 09/10/2013 00:41

Wow.

Sorry OP, but that was really horrible to read.

gobbynorthernbird · 09/10/2013 00:41

How bloody dare he? LTB

MrsTerryPratchett · 09/10/2013 00:44

He got mugged? And you are blaming him. Poor man.

Let him cancel his own phone and cards and be nice to him.

HardFacedCareeristBitchNigel · 09/10/2013 00:44

Please be a joke that i don't get. The alternative is that you are highly unpleasant.

everythinghippie29 · 09/10/2013 00:45

Just. I. What?

There has to be more to this? Who gets upset at someone for being mugged?

Tuonz · 09/10/2013 00:48

Are you mad about the mugging, or that you will have to sort it out.

If answer a. Yabu.

If answer b. He's a big lad, let him do it himself. You're not his ma.

PinocchiosLeftNostril · 09/10/2013 00:49

Does this happen a lot? What other 'situations' does he get himself into that are comparable to being mugged?

I hope expect this is just some lighthearted post that i'm not understanding properly so I'll express my blushes in advance. Blush

Gruntfuttock · 09/10/2013 00:49

Poor man.

ScarletLady02 · 09/10/2013 00:49

???

You're seriously blaming him for this...would you want him to do the same? He's been assaulted FFS.

Original poster
owhatashambles · 09/10/2013 00:53

Am madder at the muggers. But am being honest that it is a pain. This sort of stuff has happened before. His mate has called to say: 'er, we tried to stop a fight and then it got a bit out of control'. It only seems to happen on booze-fuelled nights. He can't control his drink. Yeah IABU but...like most of you am also knackered.

OP posts:
olgaga · 09/10/2013 00:59

Why is he going out with his mates getting pissed on a Tuesday night? No wonder you're pissed off.

ScarletLady02 · 09/10/2013 01:02

If he has some sort of drinking issue, that is separate from the mugging. Sorry, it was just your OP comes across as really harsh. Maybe you need to have a serious conversation with him about his drinking if he keeps getting in trouble because of it.

HardFacedCareeristBitchNigel · 09/10/2013 01:03

Maybe he works shifts and he doesnt start work until late or is off tomorrow. Dont think OP's DH needs to be slagged off for going out on a tuesday night. It is allowed you know Hmm

Monty27 · 09/10/2013 01:05

Don't let him have any more cash, cards, phones etc until he grows up. Send him to classes of some sort.

Sorry how old did you say he is? Angry

sugarman · 09/10/2013 01:49

Drinking too much can lead to a lot of problems, not least being vulnerable. I am not surprised you feel annoyed if he made himself vulnerable through getting drunk.

But I don't think you should cancel his card, phone etc. Why on earth can't he do that himself?

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 09/10/2013 02:01
Hmm
livinginwonderland · 09/10/2013 07:01

Gotta love a bit of victim blaming. "Yes, it's HIS fault for being drunk, not the muggers fault for breaking the law and attacking him." Hmm

MrsWolowitz · 09/10/2013 07:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFucker · 09/10/2013 07:12

I think this is more about the fact that he gets himself in such a state where he ends up in dangerous situations through drink, right ?

Has he a drink problem ? Coupled with a disrespect problem where he goes on the lash on a school night leaving you to hold everything together ?

Why are you picking up the pieces by cancelling cards etc ? Is he too pissed ?

Sirzy · 09/10/2013 07:16

How sympathetic of you. He is the victim of crime and you are blaming him for what has happened.

Finola1step · 09/10/2013 07:16

Is he regularly getting so drunk that he isn't aware if what's happening, hence the mugging? If so, then there is a major problem.

Why are you cancelling his cards etc? Is he so drunk that he can't do it or can't get home? I would have thought that even if a person had had quite a few, getting mugged would sober you up pretty quick.

Sounds like there is much more to this OP for you to be blaming your OH for getting mugged.

manticlimactic · 09/10/2013 07:22

My friends ex DH got mugged quite often on nights out. She found out years later he had never been mugged. He just kept losing his wallet and phone when he's had one too many.

BeckAndCall · 09/10/2013 07:27

If you read the OPs second post he's not such a victim is he? He was in midst of a fight which 'got a bit out if hand'...........

I think you've got bigger problems OP than the hassle of cancelling his cards....

NotYouNaanBread · 09/10/2013 07:27

Whatever the circs around the mugging, there is no earthly reason for you to act like his Mum by handling the consequences (phone, cards etc.), especially if you feel that his own fecklessness played a part.

You are enabling him, intentionally making a martyr or yourself and encouraging your own resentments if you fix it all for him.

Sirzy · 09/10/2013 07:28

Beck I read that as a separate incident.

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