So upset. DP and best friend have been having a little "chat" about me.

[Babybunny88]

Before my friend "A" and I met she had been friends with my DP for years. DP and I were both mutual friends with A. That is how we met, she thought we would be a good match and introduced us 7 years ago. Fantastic.

Obviously because they have been friends for so long they occasionally text which doesn't bother me in the slightest, I know they don't have any romantically inclined feelings for each other. He has often said she is like a sister to him.

Anyway, I was playing a game on DPs iPhone while he pops round to his dbs house and a message from A popped up. I accidentally pressed it (really was an accident, as I was playing the game and hit the notice), and saw my name mentioned in the text so couldn't help reading it.

It said " Lol! do you want me talk to babybunny about it? Ill make her promise not to say anything to you about it."

Anybody seeing that message would feel inclined to read previous messages, wouldn't they? So I scrolled up and saw that supposed best friend and "d"p were talking about how much weight ive apparently gained. This is word for word how the text convo went:

A: hey, thanks for coming over last night. DH and I enjoyed seeing you both and your DD has got so big!! (We went to theirs for dinner last night)

DP: babybunny and I had a nice night as well. You cook a mean curry!

A: haha I know everybody loves my curries! Maybe though a salad would have been more healthier lol!!

DP: Ahh but who wants a salad on a Saturday night? Curry goes better with Beer! Babybunny doesn't like salads anyway.

A: yes I know... Maybe we should try to get her to like them though..before she puts on any more weight...lol...

DP: yeah maybe. ( I suspect DP didn't know what to say at this point)

A: you know I love her like crazy, but she seems to have put on a bit of weight.. Not good for her health!!

DP: Yea its been since DD was born. Do you have any suggestions? I've noticed this too but for obvious reasons can't say anything.

A: tell her to put down the pies lol!! Just joking! Talk to her about it if it were me I would like DH to tell me!

DP: are you joking? She will go apeshit. Definitely not guareenteed to put down the pies then!

A: Lol! do you want me to talk to babybunny about it? Ill make her promise not to say anything to you about it.

I am sitting here half devastated half furious! I can't believe the two of them have discussed this! Ok fair enough it wasn't for my eyes and they are probably worrying about my health but I am so upset and don't know what to say to DP when he gets back. Do i say anything to A? i already have self esteem issues and this has made me feel total and utter shit.i didn't think I was that fat. And they are both wrong, I do infact like salads!

Help? :(

OP, seriously pack your partner and bag and tell him to f*ck off for the night, he is really out of order here.

I am so annoyed for you!

She forgets how sensitive you are?

You know that translates as her saying this is your fault, don't you?

Do what someone else suggested, text back "fuck off" and block her number.

I'm so sorry OP, I really feel angry for you. They are both bullies and need to grow up.

If its just banter why not text one of your DPs mates and discuss how shit he is in the sack, just cos you know, you're worried about his health and stuff. See if dp gets over sensitive about that.

Just read your last post. Don't feel
Guilty. You have done nothing wrong. Don't fall for her crocodile tears either, don't not engage with her at all ever again IMO.

Your DP sounds awful, sorry. He's behaved in an appealing manner and isn't even trying to comfort you. I'd ask him to leave for the night as he's just making it worse and doesn't understand how badly hurt you are or the gravity of the situation.

if your dp was anywhere near a decent person he would be telling her to leave you alone as you are upset, but he is telling you about her upset.
punch him in the cock and kick him out till he gets his priorities sorted. OK, maybe don't actually punch him in the cock.
you are better than those two vile individuals.

erm no. you're not sensitive.

she's INSENSITIVE.

Why the fuck is his main concern you answering the bloody phone because of how 'A' feels, and not the fact that you're sobbing your heart out after learning that your 'd'h and friend have been laughing over how fat you are (14 is NOT fat btw) and plotting a secret conversation with you to get you to slim down?! I am fucking gobsmacked at both of them, the pair of shits.

I'd also be really concerned that previous messages between them have been deleted. The relationship between them seems all wrong - and the fact he feels the need to repeatedly tell you what a 'sister' she is to him would be more concerning to me, rather than less tbh. x

'hus reply was he wasn't picking anybody over anyone'

At the start of the thread I thought A was the cunt. I am now certain that A is a cunt but I now also think your DP is a cunt. Why the fuck does he not value the feelings of the mother of his child over some random 'banter' merchant who bitches and backstabs??

I am seething on your behalf.

'Punch him in the cock'....Good advice except his clock is so tiny you can't see it. LOL, only bantering.

What Mike says.

I bet they say 'they are sorry if what they said upset you' not that they are sorry they said it.

Ignore her text.

I wonder what would happen if you said similar things to your husband about A. Eg She's gained/lost weight, looking older, wearing dodgy clothes, etc.

I bet he'd defend her.

Are you sure they are just "friends" Op? He seems very defensive...

Ditch the pair of them. They are poisonous.

And yes, you are about as sensitive as anyone else on the planet. Most people don't like the piss taken out of them for being fat, especially not when it's a friend instigating it with a husband! She knows this too - everyone on the planet does, she's just trying to blame you. Bitch.

I really hope you're alright OP, there's so many people here on your side, but do you also have someone in RL you can talk to?

What an absolute cunt your "friend" is.

Wouldn't be happy about them being friends.

I'll text the bitch for you. Fucking cow.

In a way I think it's good that you're crying, so your DP can see just how upset you are. I hope he feels like shit.

I agree with the above posters - go for a walk. Don't talk to him until he apologises properly and appears genuinely remorseful. And text that dickhead on the end of the phone saying 'Get yourself to fuck you hateful bitch and don't talk to me again. Ever'.

"You're my girl", fuck off, who says that to an adult woman anyway?? She sounds like a fucking idiot tbh, her texts are completely infantile.

And she is definitely trying to undermine you in front of your DH, who of course has not come off well either.

Fuck's sake I cannot believe her "apology". Basically turning it on you that you are over-sensitive. I'm raging on your behalf OP. Hope you feel better soon.

And yes, I wouldn't be happy with them being friends any more either

I think the motives of friend A are sick, completely and utterly sick and your partner is a spineless twat.

... and the fact your dp isn't grovelling with an apology to you, rather than engaging further with the bitchy mate and making you think you're in the wrong is just OUTRAGEOUS!

Ina way I suppose you could take it as a compliment. That is definitely one jealous friend.

Banter?! Oh she is such a LAD isn't she?

Twat!

Fresh air
Hot bath once dd settled

Oh Gosh he is such a COWARD.

He's never actually faced up to being a grown up man has he?

He's always had her there right beside him through your whole relationship.

It's about time he grew the fuck up and told her to back off. He won't, and I really feel for you that you're in a situation where your only choices are to leave your H or put up with utter fuckwittery from him.