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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To give the DC a day off school for this reason?

207 replies

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 05/09/2013 11:32

MIL is over from Oz...she comes once a year and she goes back on Sunday. Shall I keep the DC off school tomorrow so that they get an extra full day with her? It's only just occurred to me to suggest it...I've not mentioned it to MIL or DC yet.

She loves them so much and it's reciprocated....she misses them badly over the year. Also...if I am not being unreasonable, what shall I tell school?

OP posts:
Chattymummyhere · 05/09/2013 15:31

If they have just started reception I would not take them out, missing one day can make a huge difference when they are learning phonics which can then hold them back being given a book with words again holding back their reading..

Again if its reception children they have only just started school, just getting used to the new environment, new teacher, new friends to pull them out to have an extra day of "hey lets play with granny" when she has been here for a long time by your own admission and schools have only just gone back this week seems stupid sorry op YABU!

Also don't see two children being fit as a fiddle thursday suddenly BOTH being soo ill they cannot come in on a friday way to get off to a bad start with the school days into the new school year

luxemburgerli · 05/09/2013 15:35

Nope, I am in Switzerland, Mum in NZ. I do sympathise, and would probably do it myself. I just thought I'd mention it because there's no way my mum (or PIL, who live in a third country) would go for it.

Famzilla · 05/09/2013 16:01

Haven't read the whole thread so sorry if it's progressed and the below is irrelevant but..

When I was little my maternal grandparents lived a 5 hour drive away (I had previously lived with them for years so we were very close) and would only be able to visit rarely due to ill health. I remember having to go to school on the days they were leaving and crying all day! Therefore IMO YANBU, let your DC spend this last little bit of time with their grandparents. They will remember it a lot more than whatever they would learn in class that day.

BrokenSunglasses · 05/09/2013 16:08

YABU.

parkin2010 · 05/09/2013 16:15

Let her have a day off :) definitely. I wouldn't say anything to school , say they have had tummy upset. I really hate on here how bounded by rules some people are.

allhappyfamiliesarealike · 05/09/2013 16:21

Not read thread but my answer would be the same.

YANBU - let her have the day off and have fun. The Teaching Unions are, according to the wireless, planning more strikes so clearly they don't thinking missing the odd day damages children's education!

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 05/09/2013 16:23

I wouldn't, not this week anyway when everyone is just finding their feet in their new classes. Especially not if she's been here for a few weeks already. It's not her actual last day, they can see her off on Sunday presumably.

HerrenaHarridan · 05/09/2013 16:25

I love threads like these, they remind me why I'm so set on home ed.

It's your kids op, which do you think they would get the most long term benefit from!

AFishWithoutABicycle · 05/09/2013 16:27

As long as I felt he wasn't missing out too much. He's only five its not like he'll have exams.

stealthsquiggle · 05/09/2013 16:27

See, I would say that it would be more memorable for the DC if she were to take them to school and collect them to go somewhere special afterwards - they can show her their school/classroom and she will have a mental picture of what they are rabbiting on about for the next year on the phone.

squoosh · 05/09/2013 16:28

YANBU.

Despite what some people think, the sky will not fall in if they miss a day of school.

TartyMcTart · 05/09/2013 16:34

They have literally just gone back to school!

I cannot see any circumstances whatsoever why a child should be kept off school unless they are ill. Absolutely ridiculous.

3birthdaybunnies · 05/09/2013 16:34

stealth has a good point, maybe not at this short notice but another year why not enquire whether MIL could go in and chat to the class about Australia. Our school usually encourage parents and relatives to come in and talk to the children - they will probably be really proud to show her off.

JenaiMorris · 05/09/2013 16:54

What stealthsquiggle said.

Let her collect them from school and go off together to do something you wouldn't approve of. That's what grandparents are for.

mrsjay · 05/09/2013 17:03

och have a day off to spend with gran before she goes back I cant see the harm in it myself it is not as if she is up the road or something.

cantspel · 05/09/2013 17:05

Ok as long as you dont mind if the teacher takes a day off when her granny comes to visit and your kids are left watching video's for the day in the school hall.

squoosh · 05/09/2013 17:07

Hardly comparing like with like there cantspel unless the OP's DC are child geniuses who take class when the teacher is on a fag break.

DoctorRobert · 05/09/2013 17:12

YANBU.

An extra day with a grandparent they rarely get to see vs one day of missed school? I know which I'd choose.

I think a lot of people get hysterical over this kind of thing

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 05/09/2013 17:20

Excellent post by stealthsquiggle

CoolStoryBro · 05/09/2013 17:31

We live abroad and it wouldn't even enter my head to let the kids have time off when their Grandparents are here. That's when I get to do grown up boozy lunches with my folks!

SPBisResisting · 05/09/2013 17:40

Hve the fines come in? Would that affect your decision?

hellymelly · 05/09/2013 17:46

YANBU. I would happily keep the dcs off for something like this. One day with their Grandma who they rarely see will do them more good long term than that day in school. I never quite understand why people get so het up about children missing a day here and there. I would feel guilty taking a long holiday in term time, but a day off for good reason like this? I wouldn't worry about it.

merrymouse · 05/09/2013 17:51

I think it depends on their ages/teachers/timetable.

In general, I would prioritise a one off special day over a random day at school. However, if its the first week of a new year and, for instance, they will miss their weekend homework/feel that they are permanently behind on a new maths concept/will miss the auditions for this term's play, then it might not be worth it.

nancy75 · 05/09/2013 17:57

To all those that don't agree with the children having a day off, do your family live here in the uk? Until you have family that live thousands of miles away it is hard to understand what a difference a day with them makes. Op my dd's grandparents live in oz, I would give them the day off

LadyBeagleEyes · 05/09/2013 17:57

FFS this is why I'm going off MN.
One day off to spend the last day with a granny who she won't see again for months.
What harm can it possibly do?