to wish dh wouldn't boast about me/us?

[Hollibaloo]

I know he has good intentions of being complimentary about me and expressing his happiness about us but I feel like his 'boasting' alienates people. For example, if anyone we know is pregnant he'll go on about how much I still did when pregnant. If anyone's about to give birth he'll tell them how I did it pain relief free, was out in 5 hours. If anyone's breastfeeding and expecting their dp to help he'll say how he's never been disturbed at night. If anyone's got their mum over to help with kids he'll mention how I've never had any help, that he didn't even take paternity leave etc. He doesn't say these things in a nasty way, just in a 'recounting his experience' way but it ultimately leads to me getting daggers from whoever he's telling and I think it alienates us. AIBU to think he should stop telling everyone everything when they're going through things, only tell if specifically asked and in a more diplomatic less braggy way?

YANBU. You need to have a word, because you will end up with no friends. Why didn't he take paternity leave?

Bit weird to brag about not helping with his own child.

So he basically tells people he's an unsupportive father who leaves everything to you?
Strange.
You aren't the one who should be getting daggers.

Your Husband is a dickhead, based on this and your other most recent post about him not wanting you to breast feed if you decide to have another baby..

Yanbu. It sounds embarrassing, especially as he is effectively boasting about how crap he's been with his own kids!

Bit weird to brag about not helping with his own child.

^ Yeah that.

Even if any of this stuff was brag-worthy, it would be awkward for him to do it especially in front of you. I am a bit old fashioned or whatever but I really think you should let your accomplishments speak for themselves and I cringe when people brag about themselves or their spouses. It's just bad form!

Yeah, bit weird that he's bragging about not helping you at all, not supporting you, and not taking any paternity leave. Are you sure you're getting daggers, and not pity?

Oh.. are you the one whose other half said he would only agree to have another baby with you if you bottlefed instead of breastfed so you could not have more nights out and more sex.

The guy sounds like a top notch tool.

Yes, I should think pity would be more likely than daggers. Can you not just tell him to shut up?!

*could have .. whoops

Earth-crashing bore apart from anything else... That'll be an LTB from me

He's not boasting about you, he's putting you in your place. Which is below him. He sounds like an utter fool.

He doesn't see it as not helping he sees it as complimenting me for being 'super capable' which is super bloody annoying for everyone else I imagine! Especially when their husbands join in - when I was a few days before due date we met with his friend, wife and kids at a country park and after several miles of walking his friend asked when I was actually due then berated his wife as she was in bed for the last two months of pregnancy and actually said 'you should have been more like Holli'. Not sure if she wanted to kill him or me more. I then always try to mitigate what dh has said with 'every pregnancy is different' a

You walked several miles a few days before your before your due date?

Do you like a bit of stealth boasting yourself OP?

He doesn't see it as not helping he sees it as complimenting me for being 'super capable' which is super bloody annoying for everyone else I imagine!

No, but I think this is what he'd have you believe, because it makes it easier for him to manipulate you into doing everything and letting him be the lazy bastard that he is. I very much doubt that anyone is annoyed by it, except on your behalf, or possibly with you for allowing him to get away with it.

Ok, it's great that you managed to keep doing stuff when you were pregnant, but he does realise that not all pregnancies are the same, doesn't he? And getting a bit of help from your mum is no badge of shame, and getting a bit of help from your partner (including him taking paternity) leave is a healthy sign of his interest in his family... I don't see that he's got anything to boast about there.

He does sound a bit smug and self-satisfied, and that's irritating that other people have to put up with that, but I also think he may be building up unrealistic expectations of you. Are you planning to have more kids? What if the next pregnancy is harder work? What if you do need more help somewhere along the line? I think you should have a chat with him about it.

Sorry posted before I was finished...
And I feel that I then sound patronising.

Classy - was giving an example that's all. And was only walking miles to encourage baby to be born!

What jinsei says

Don't you feel resentful that he hasn't helped you at all?

Stealth boasting from you. This next bit is going to sound super bitchy but its meant as a genuine question: Does it make you feel better about you/your relationship to be 'superwoman' with a 'proud' husband?

Utter grade A twattery from him. Does he have any redeeming points at all?