Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Aibu - crap staff using mental health excuses

278 replies

Joiningthegang · 22/08/2013 20:30

Aibu to think that whilst there are many many people with genuine mental health issues, I am sooo pissed off that when crap member of staff is "found out" they play the mental Health stress card, get signed off sick and you can't really do anything about it.

I am mostly pissed off because they ruin it for the genuinely ill people.

OP posts:
littlecloud · 22/08/2013 22:30

Highly strung oh god it was a joke bloody hell just because I didn't put a smiley. FFS I made a grammatical error and got pulled up on it.

Leverette · 22/08/2013 22:30

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:31

The only bit that really worries me, as surely we're all aware of discrimination and lack of empathy/ understanding in the general population, is that some of the discriminatory stuff is apparently coming from health care professionals. Fabulous. :(

Garcia10 · 22/08/2013 22:31

Just to reiterate - I think the main issue is people who fake they have MH issues to get time off work. From my experience and perspective it is relatively easy to do and unfortunately means that those with true MH issues are not afforded the understanding they undoubtedly deserve.

littlecloud · 22/08/2013 22:32

Leverette no nothing to do with me funnily enough. It's our working environment and nature of the job that sets them off how many times do I have to say the same thing ,the stress of the job not the people in it!! I wasn't even in when they left but had to come I on my day off because they chose to leave. right don't know why i'm getting sucked back into this.

TheOrchardKeeper · 22/08/2013 22:32

I don't think, after a long diatribe against MH sufferers, that a joke like that is a very good idea.

If you are that nice then maybe reconsider things like that, surely?

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:33

God, yeah, it's like all those tens of thousands who fake bad backs and whiplash isn't Italy. Except most of them don't.

Leverette · 22/08/2013 22:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:35

Isn't it, not Italy :) but I imagine mist of them are labouring or sone such in the Italian sunshine... ;)

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:35

Omg. I really can't type, as it transpires.

TheOrchardKeeper · 22/08/2013 22:36

Me either Caff2

Have a Wine and pretend you never cack up normally... Grin

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:37

:D

TheOrchardKeeper · 22/08/2013 22:37

Do agree with not taking the weight by yourself. It's up to your management to sort that out and of course you'll feel resentful if you're taking on so much because of that...

perplexedpirate · 22/08/2013 22:41

Courtney Stodden is in there!

Lakalalalalalalal!!!

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:41

This thread's just really wound me up, because I (naively, as it turned out) believed that attitudes towards mental illness had changed and become more informed. But it appears not. Like the mentally ill are still the "lepers" and should ring their bells if they're "properly" ill or "grow up" if they can manage with support. :(

littlecloud · 22/08/2013 22:41

It's not the managers fault they have been very accommodating considering this has happened on more than one occasion and is hard to manage someone when you don't know how they will be from one day to the next, they can't take away their shifts but have to be wary that they may not complete their shift. If someone leaves someone has to cover the shift or the people left behind are left in the shit and when they aren't 100% themselves it would be selfish of me to say you know what you deal with it i'm enjoying my day off. We all look out for each other cover shifts and will all go above and beyond to avoid someone working a really horrible shift short staffed if we can possibly cover it. So in short I would have rather stayed at home with my kids but but didn't want people who I consider friends to have a horrible shift. And I know they'd do the same for me.

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:42

I just wonder if "my colleague's got cancer, sometimes he has days off and it screws up our shifts, am I being unreasonable to hate him?" Would get the same response.

Ilovemypajamas · 22/08/2013 22:43

I've a history of mental health problems, diagnoses of bpd, PTSD, depression etc. I'm well now (it's bliss, never take it for granted).

I think people on both sides of this argument basically need a bit more compassion; be it compassion for the person with a 'clinical' mental health problem, compassion for the person whose just so frickin stressed they need a bit of a breather, or compassion for the person 'holding the fort' at work. It's a shit situation for all people in those scenarios. Why compare whose got it worse? Perhaps if we all were a bit kinder mental health problems wouldn't be so bloody prevalent.

Flowers
WeAreEternal · 22/08/2013 22:44

As a mental health care professional please take a Biscuit and fuck off with it

Spikeytree · 22/08/2013 22:46

WeAreEternal - thank you for being a MH professional who gives a shit.

littlecloud · 22/08/2013 22:48

Caff that's been done already up post - if someone had cancer they wouldn't work full time in my line of work and if they worked part time there would be an extra staff member available for cover this person insists on working full time and asks for extra hours and when they leave makes it hard as there is no extra cover especially at the moment at as 4 of us are ill and could be signed off but have chosen to continue to work otherwise the business would effectively collapse.

littlecloud · 22/08/2013 22:51

must learn to use full stops. I'm done shattered, I no longer feel I need to defend my feelings. I know I'm a good person and am entitled to feel erked and I haven't actually voiced this to the person in question my opinion doesn't effect them in the slightest.

Caff2 · 22/08/2013 22:52

Well done. It's so marvellous you're sacrificing your health, since you're all so ill, to carry on.

You couldn't though, if you were TOO ill, could you?

By the way, I'm not mentally ill, I have no personal axe to grind, but am close to some people who are, and it IS akin to a terminal diagnosis in some.

Boosiehs · 22/08/2013 22:57

So littlecloud, my mum who kept working and working, because if she didn't there was no one to do the work, and her bosses ignored her cries for help, was just being difficult when she tried to kill herself due to severe anxiety and depression. How awful of her to inconvenience people like that.

Oh and of course it affected her work far more than her or her family.

You have no fucking idea luv.

littlecloud · 22/08/2013 23:00

Caff2 people work through illness every day of the week. Yes we all could get signed off, I don't want to divulge the nature of our illness/ailments but at the end of the day we'd rather have a job than work for a business that effectively has to close due to no staff (yes it's very unlucky to have 5 staff members not well and no the business can't take on more people as a contingency that 60% of it's work force is off ill) we are probably working at 50% of our ability but we are there and we're all feeling pretty crappy together but we're a team so have had to pull together.